the stress,
the cost,
the stress,
the stress
why do we do this every year?
also to be actually productive: how do you keep costs down? and do you have any strategies for giving and receiving gifts without having or inflicting a mental breakdown?
Is your aluminium pole up? Tinsel is very distracting.
Yup. "Very high strength-to-weight ratio"
I believe in Festivus.
Is that you Octavius ?
for the rest of us!
I hate the family drama and all the nightmares that having horrid in-laws bring, that unfortunately comes out during Christmas.
I do enjoy the idea of sharing things and enjoying things with others though, I am planning on volunteering on Christmas.
I feel the exact same way. If it weren’t for the in laws (one in particular) I would love Christmas.
I just want to enjoy the holidays like a normal sane person.
Free of stress, full of food, and lots of rest. Not, a lot of stress, stress eating and a lot of agitation.
If it weren’t for the in laws (one in particular) I would love Christmas.
They are in laws, you can always change them…
I am rather fond of my husband though.
@loulou1: Try going away for either Christmas or Easter each year. It doesn't have to be expensive, but far enough that you can't travel back for the day.
One of my friends does this and she finds it a real relief.
@Lastchancetosee: thank you. It is difficult because hubby's a shift worker 365 days a year and I hate going away without him because I feel like we should be together as a family.
@jv: In some ways we might present that way. However we have been married for approximately 20 years.
@loulou1: It's also not a bad idea to volunteer. Normally people see it as a noble thing to do, and Christmas is one of the busiest time for many charities especially those that rely on volunteers.
Whatever the motives are, I think :P
@loulou1: Lie and say that you’re going away and then stay home?
Alternatively, just say that you’ll go to their house one year and the next you’ll be choosing to celebrate it with your own family unit? Doesn’t fix the problem but cuts it in half? :p.
My in laws aren’t horrid, but one person can be antagonistic and it’s just stressful trying to cater for everyone’s schedule and preferences.
We only do our family unit on Christmas Day and much prefer it. Used to just be me and hubby. Now me, hubby and Bub. It’s so much less stressful. We still make delicious food. We can stay in our pjs as long as we like. We usually have a swim either at the beach or in our pool.
We then see any family we’re going to sometime around that period and just do a normal catch up.
I highly recommend it if you can.
Needs a poll.
But I like Christmas because I get to see all my family over those few days without interruption, and its nice to see the kids all happy playing with the things you got them.
it would probably be more fun if i could work out how to get some children in my life. i don't seem to be able to.
Kids are Reason for season. with kids in our day and ages It Gift next Gift next Gift next (repeat for 30 plus time) kids never really get joy of just one gift like our grandparent day
Three only thing I don't like about it is spoilt relatives children that are impossible to buy for.
If they don't appreciate it, and they've already got too much crap, I can see an easy solution to the problem…
Yep. What SHOULD you buy the people who have everything?
Perhaps a hint could be a donation in their name to a charity?
Drowning?
'pends on the cost.
Mystery boxes! I’ve found that’s the best present because it’s a bunch of random crap they probably don’t have without your having to spend any effort in putting it together. Alternatively, pile them in the “don’t care” pile and don’t stress. Spoiled behaviour shouldn’t be rewarded.
i love mariah carey. i love Christmas.
Don't mind the occasion itself, really really hate the financial cost of it.
I just avoid Christmas. All the family are adults now and we all agreed there's no point giving gifts to each other. If we had children then yes, we would do the whole Christmas tree/presents/etc thing. But otherwise, what's the point?
A few years ago when the family got together it took a whole 30 seconds around Christmas lunch for the mother of all arguments to erupt. I just don't care any more and avoid all the stress, hassle and time wasting.
We roll from Christmas lunch to Christmas dinner, with the expectation that you'll stuff yourself full of food every time. Feasts made sense in old times in the northern hemisphere winter, where people could enjoy great food because it was a rare occasion. Now almost everyone can afford to eat well all year round.
Have you seen the way people drive in car parks near Christmas time? It's manic, and some people are just a moment away from boiling over.
so you don't go to a christmas party anymore?
I ignore it and it goes away.
I like Christmas, but absolutely hate the commercial aspect. I prefer to buy my kids stuff through the year as they express an interest in things, rather than buying things "just because" at Christmas. It's a waste of money, and a waste of resources, and a source of waste.
Mine are younger, but my big presents this year are annual passes to the zoo and scitech
The gift that keeps on giving through the year :)
How old are yours? Mine are 3 and 15 (I highly recommend against this by the way).
Man I used to love scitech! Do they still have the IMAX theatre there?
Oh wow! Mine are 6 and 8.5 :)
Yes but it's used as a planetarium, but it's included in your Scitech pass :)
@spackbace: Ah, you are much smarter than I then.
Might have to drop in and see the planearium next time I'm over.
Jesus christ, that age difference. I can't imagine dealing with a new born, and a puberty riddled kid at the same time.
LOL
Can't stand it ….best way out of the mayhem is to go overseas, did this one year and it was great, just wife & I and not bugged with large family gatherings!!. Only problem now is our global COVID pandemic has stuffed that up for a while!. Presents should only be applicable for the youngsters up to around 15!, and a gift for the significant other, or none IF by mutual agreement!!!.
We have never been a gift giving household and I always hated in social events where you "chip" in to a gift, and when it's your turn you just end up getting crappy junk. I just slowly tapered off contributing in my social circle. In regards to my husband, we just buy stuff as we need, he has a ban on buying stuff as he's the "buy the first link that pops up on Google" instead of searching for the best price.
Now that we have a kid, I don't think we will be starting the Christmas gift giving tradition, why not just reward them when they deserve it instead of leveraging the prospect of gifts at the end of the year. Also, I want them to be grateful to us for buying the gift not thanking some imaginary figure!
Imagination and stories are a great part of being a kid with no responsibilities imo.
Because kids love the excitement of what’s hidden under the tree? The anticipation to waiting for the event and the fact that the gifts are wrapped and they have to open them. There’s also a bit of social “pressure” when every other kid gets to celebrate Christmas and they don’t.
Definitely a decision for your family and the right answer is the one that works for you guys. But there’s definitely a bit to consider!
You don’t have to be a lemming to be like “everyone” else, cherry pick what is ok with you.
A few years ago my family moved to Kris Kringle (KK). We put all names in a lucky dip and pick one person each to buy for. We have a maximum spend per present of $50. We have some little kids in the family so we can l buy additional gifts for them if we want to. It’s like an extra $20 gift for them and it’s optional. This works great to reduce the cost and stress of Christmas. Making one trip to a shopping centre is usually enough to get gift giving sorted. As others have mentioned you can do a lot online. Additionally we all bring a plate/food to lunch together. Divide up the responsibilities - someone do dessert, someone do vegetables, maybe a couple of people coordinate on meats, etc. share the costs, share the responsibilities and share the stress. Christmas is a time about sharing and coming together. It’s nice to give and receive gifts but no need to go overboard. Don’t leave things to the last minute. Get things organised early and then no stress in the last weeks of December when things are often busy at work due to the coming shutdown period.
I've been trying to convince my family to move to a KK for years but they wont budge. So frustrating.
Get sick of all the jingles and advertising.
Don't do gift giving, don't accept gifts. Will just buy someone something if I want to. But that could happen anytime if year.
Nice to see people getting together with their families (even if it's also a source of stress and frustration).
Nice to think that some people ignore all the consumerism and social comparisons and find a way to just turn their attention towards home and their loved ones.
PS bargain huntress just in case someone forgets to say it: Happy Christmas to you, thanks for all the effort, you're a star :)
aw how nice thank you ozbjunkie :) merry christmas to you too and double ditto
I’m an atheist so I don’t celebrate Xmas
I also don’t celebrate Australia Day, a.k.a Invasion Day
I don’t believe Jesus Christ was the saviour from God but that’s not relevant to those things. I’m an atheist but I celebrate getting together with my family and sharing stories, memories, food and even gift giving. I also celebrate Australia Day because I’m proud to live in Australia. I can acknowledge and celebrate Aborigines were the first people here and still celebrate the wonderful multicultural successful democracy we live in today. My point is that being an atheist doesn’t mean you have to reject Christmas and Australia Day. I accept Australia Day as the day Captain Cook landed on Australian shores and bought western values to this country. I’m thankful it wasn’t the Chinese or another culture because I expect the outcome would have been far worse.
By atheist, do you mean you believe there is no god or you know there is no god?
I Personally almost ‘know’ because God is a human mental construct. Similar to Santa Claus, religious ideas like heaven, reincarnation, Jesus Christ, Mohammed, Moses, etc are all just fairy tales in my opinion. I don’t have a problem if others believe as long as they don’t force their views on me too much then each to their own. I understand religion fills a void for some people. I accept that following must bring them some pleasure so that’s cool.
Australia Day is when Captain Phillip and the 1st fleet landed at Botany Bay. Nothing to do with Cook.
My 2c worth. We should have a Cook day instead and a separate day for all Aussies.
Fair enough. Thanks. I was mistaken.
Then you are an intelligent individual who can see through the BS. These religious nutters who think their god is male, have no idea that all "creator" gods are androgynous - meaning they are essentially Yin and Yang.
Stay true to the atheist enlightened road. You are not alone.
You don't have to reject things like Christmas Day, but you don't have to wait for one specific day in the calendar to do things like getting together with family and enjoy their company. These days all holidays are commercialised; everyone is convinced they have to buy, buy, buy. People spending money they don't have on things they don't need to impress people they don't like.
Celebrate Summer solstice. Winter solstice is where Xmas is derived from anyway.
i feel that very few people that celebrate christmas in the modern world are doing it for religious purposes nowadays lol. which is why i dont endorse banning it from schools.
Religious teaching should be banned from schools because it teaches false equivalence thinking & anti-intellectualism
i dont disagree but that doesnt really come up with christmas-time unless youre at a catholic school. that was my point. its more like 'lets make tree ornaments' yay.
the most confusing thing to me about this australia day vs invasion day ruckus and bull, is that i don't know a single person who actually celebrates australia day. it's just another public holiday and possibly a long weekend to just about everyone as far as i can tell. so who gives a f?
Why do I have to be subjected to someone else's FABLE religion, both visually, with idiotic and entirely plagiarised Ded Moroz as Santa, and some plagiarised Hindu Krishna as their Jesus, and Hindu Maya, as their Mary… they thought they burnt all the books! Then there is the insult to my ears with ridiculous Xmas jingles not of our region or climate.
All churches should have their crosses torn down and the FABLE HALLS closed down.
Do i need to call the police, are you OK?
Dad go bed you're drunk.
I'm not crazy for it but I do like seeing my little cousins enjoy their gifts.
Just sucks that I can't be with them this Christmas
If you don't want presents a nice thing to do is pick a charity that means something to you and suggest a donation to that :)
And yes, can understand why so many people hate christmas. but i more feel for people always during this time who don't have enough because it is a reminder to them of their lack of basics / food / stuff for their kids - at a time where advertising and shopping is shoved in everyones faces. Must be horrible.
Also feel for isolated people of which there are many in australia, not just the elderly or ill or people with disabilities who struggle to leave the house.
you could always volunteer this time to make it a positive experience for you and others.
The Human Fund: Money for People.
And I suppose the thing would be to identify whats most stressful and combat that head on which you havent mentioned . Is it because you are hosting? Is there a way to share that respnosibility? True family should be willing to come together to bring a plate or support. Soo many people go way overboard on christmas meals (not saying that's you) and we all have fridges and freezers - stuff can be done in advance, or shareed out.
In terms of cost - budgeting, looking for deals on ozbargain, figuring out what you would actually be happy to spend and can afford without the pressure of everything else. Buying ferrero rochers when they're half price at coles which seems to be most of december lol . I used etsy to find some unique and locally crafted gifts that were actually great value for money.
and of course focussing on what you have to be grateful for <3
good luck <3
Be the force for change!
We roster people to buy gifts for kids(0 stress), and for the adults, we buy a heap of 20 dollar presents and then play a stealing game, take turns opening up a present and give everyone an option to either open a present, or steal a present, makes fun little game and takes the tress out of it.
Christmas is the most stressful time of year. It's not really the $ or gift-giving, and in fact, I do enjoy giving nice gifts, but it's all the pressure to be at so many places and also all the pressure and stress from wives, mothers and mothers-in-law (not trying to be sexist, but this is where it comes from) regarding food preparation and big meals. It's all angst and stress emanating from them. I say why not just have something simple? We don't need British-style roasts on a hot summer's day but I get told off because this is the tradition.
I don't hate it but it has turned into an orgy of consumerism.
I am not religious at all but very little regard is given these days to the real reason people celebrate Christmas. Mostly it seems its just about buying/selling as many goods and services as possible.
I personally do not celebrate Christmas for various reasons and as the years have gone by, I've become more and more jaded - especially after having worked a retail job during uni and having heard the news about people being trampled to death etc in USA.
My partner spends the whole month stressing about gifts, worrying that her family and friends will judge her if she doesn't match the dollar value previously spent on her. It's all so disheartening watching something that should be fuelled by kindness turning into a completely materialistic event.
Also, as a side note, if I was Catholic (I'm not) I'd be kinda pissed that someone has taken my religious milestone and turned it into some consumer BS in which a bunch of people who don't even believe in God are celebrating the birthday of Jesus lol
To keep costs and stress down, on my side we have Kris kringle which sometimes end up quite hollow - giving each other the same amount of money in a card so we can buy something in the sales. My in laws side decided to stop giving presents to adults when the youngest adults bought houses.
From an overeating point of view, my side celebrates on Christmas Eve, with seafood. The in laws do the traditional roasts on Christmas Day. It will still be stressful on both days for various reasons, but I do look forward to Christmas night when we're back home.
The thing that irritates me about marketing around Christmas time is everyone telling you to have a happy Christmas, a joyous Christmas, or even a magical Christmas. How do I have a magical Christmas without resorting to spells and sorcery?
So much pressure to make sure you give the right gifts, and don't miss anyone, and to match the retail value of gifts so I don't give someone a $50 gift and they gave me $500. We're so desperate that retailers resorted to flogging gift cards, a form of money that can only be used in one store and eventually expires or is worthless if the store goes bust. It's like cash, but much worse.
Wholeheartedly agree
is that you Grinch?
no
I've had a mixed experience with my last few Christmases
Two years ago I really got into it, back to basics, wreath on the door, lights strung up, I nailed giving people gifts and bought really thoughtful presents. None of the gifts I received really had a lot of thought put into them, they either bought what I asked them for or gave me garbage, but I was surprisingly okay with it, I found the act of gift giving really rewarding.
Last year I spent Christmas in Morocco - not a single carol to be heard, zero Santa's! I highly recommend.
This year I find myself buying garbage to give as presents, which is very disappointing.
Now I've got a newborn - I'm taking this year easy, in the knowledge that future Christmases are going to be full of consumerist junk
Christmas truce
Just a lunch and thats it. Except the kids but get for them on black friday deals, so all set and avoid the shops.
That said I hate Xmas, time to unwind not wind up, American consumerism at it worst.
Just tell them you only celebrate Festivus!
Do secret santa style gift exchanges. Heaps of fun, little stress.
Xmas is only as expensive and stressful as you want it to be. We don't bother with presents for anyone but kids, some adults give gifts but it is not expected or required and about the only thing we do is swim, BBQ and relax. So I like xmas as it is basically a restful time off to do bugger all and I tend to save a lot of money as I don't shop before xmas (some of the after xmas sales cost me a bomb though)
Yes
Best time of the year, hand down. It's for celebrating Christ's birth, so of course it's awesome.
You will feel better when you get Max to accompany you for christmas.
But I do only have 1 complaint on Christmas in Australia….its freakin summer.
If only I could build a snowman….or snow olaf with the kids.
I dont have any friends. No friends, no gift exchange.
I've been living in Japan for over 5 years now, and they don't celebrate Christmas they way its done in Australia.
I'll be working Christmas Day, my apartment is very cold, and cake and KFC is the tradition.
Always hated Christmas growing up, but now that I'm living in a country that doesn't care much/thesame about Christmas, I'm liking it more and more.
It's the people and environment that makes or breaks Christmas.
Gave up on buying presents long ago, as online shopping makes it feel like Christmas once or twice a week.
Happy festivus
how unchristian
I fear we are all becoming cows, grazing in the endless farm of consumerism. Endlessly buying stuff we don't need instead of using our minds and learning more the way evolution intended.
Moooo! 🐮
For the stress part, it is why gift card exists, problem solve?
For the cost part, welcome to ozbargain, we are here for you (ish).
I know an entire region that doesn't like Xmas, guess which one is it? Hahaha
I believe in Festivus.