How to Cope with Pet Loss

ireadtermsofuse on 23/04/2017 - 00:03

Today was the day when we had to put our 5 month kitten to rest.

Back in January, we adopted a kitten from an adoption foundation. My partner was brought up with animals, whereas I wasn't.

However, understanding how the bonding of pets throughout the months has changed my love of animals.

Today, we had one option and that was the euthanise her as she has contracted the deadly FIP disease.

My partner is in a mess right now. She can't forget the moment as the kitten was on her lap during the last seconds of life - or how the house feels empty (we live together in our own home).

I've been consoling her throughout the night - which is around the time when she sleeps on the couch and the kitten is there curled up beside her. All of that is now non existent.

So, I'm just asking for advice from pet lovers how they have dealt with situations like this

Home & Garden

Comments

  • pfpozbargain on 23/04/2017 - 00:21
    -8

    Buy another one.

  • xoom on 23/04/2017 - 00:31
    +5

    i lost our beloved dog after 12 years. you ball your eyes out. they become part of the family.

    in time you will be able to move on.

  • Pantone on 23/04/2017 - 00:32
    +3

    Just cry and take your time before getting a new one, not too long though as clearly you are an animal person. And never let any try to make your grief less than this or that, that's dumb, the loss can only be determined from the person grieving. Animals fly right underneath our barriers to protect ourselves, for many people it is the only love they have, so I'm sorry it will hurt bad for a few weeks then it lessen a little, a month after that think about getting a new family member, though always treating it as a separate animal and not merely a replacement. Hope this helps.

  • Sage on 23/04/2017 - 00:45
    -7

    You had it for 2 months? That's not very long at all.
    I'm sure she'll get over it in a few days, it's normal to mourn for a little while and it helps in the long term to get the emotions out.

  • Zaenille on 23/04/2017 - 00:46

    Hey, I'm sorry you have to go through this. It's okay to be down for a while.

    You just have to be with your SO throughout the process. Watch movies with her, eat out or cook, do normal everyday stuff. When she breaks down, just be there for her.

  • hell0 on 23/04/2017 - 00:57
    +1

    So sorry for your loss, there isn't much to be done except support your partner and maybe read her this poem which always makes me cry, called 'The Rainbow Bridge'

    There is a bridge connecting Heaven and Earth. It is called the Rainbow Bridge because of its many splendid colors. Just this side of Rainbow Bridge there is a land of meadows, hills and valleys with lush, green grass. When beloved pets die, they are carried to this place.

    There is always food and water and warm spring weather. The old and frail animals are young again. Those who are maimed are made whole again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days gone by.

    They are happy and content except for one thing… they each miss their special people who loved them on Earth. So each day they all run and play together, until the day comes when one suddenly stops playing and looks up! The nose twitches. The ears are up! The eager body quivers, the bright eyes intent… and this one suddenly runs from the group, flying across the green grass. You have been seen!

    And when you and your special friend meet, you take her in your arms and embrace. Your face is kissed again and again, your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the eyes are your trusting pet.

    And at last, you cross the Rainbow Bridge together…
    Never again to be apart.

  • altomic on 23/04/2017 - 01:48
    -3

    You're on ozbargain so….think of how you'll now save on pet food, worming, flea collars, vet fees , etc

  • Diji1 on 23/04/2017 - 02:50

    Don't try to fight the feelings of grief, try to experience them.

    Things will feel a lot worse briefly but if you persist you will start to feel better quickly.

    This is practicing self acceptance.

    • Kangal on 23/04/2017 - 10:30

      …and lot's of sad music, romantic movies, and ice cream!
      At least that's what the media says.

      I believe having great friends and a good lifestyle (food, exercise, stress minimisation) are the key ingredients.

  • John Kimble on 23/04/2017 - 03:26
    +2

    Unfortunate user name checks out

  • garffi on 23/04/2017 - 07:47
    +1

    There's nothing you can do but cry for a few days, feel down for a few weeks, and after a few months it gets better. Take your time before adopting another, make sure you're ready for a new family member and not just a mere substitute. Good luck, there's no easy way out unfortunately.

  • fruit on 23/04/2017 - 11:51
    +1

    hugs it's bloody hard.

  • MeesusEff on 23/04/2017 - 14:30

    I lost my first pet rabbit last year, due to someone's cat entering our yard and tearing him to pieces. Made me feel so angry and heartbroken that irresponsible cat owners think its alright to do so. Nonetheless, we buried him in our yard, bawled our eyes out. Took us a few months but we adopted another one who has overfilled the hole left behind :)

  • whooah1979 on 23/04/2017 - 14:40

    So, I'm just asking for advice from pet lovers how they have dealt with situations like this

    The only way is to have a cry (or not) and move on.

    We couldn't keep ours, so they were of to the rspca.

  • ireadtermsofuse on 23/04/2017 - 18:31
    +4

    Thank you everyone for their advice.

    I thought it would be nice to set up a small shrine with the picture of our kitten, her old toys placed infront of the photo frame with a lit up candle as well. It made my partner feel a lot better :)

  • billy3000 on 23/04/2017 - 19:26
    +1

    I kinda like the Buddhist philosophy about rebirth.. I also take some solace in that I made very day of my dogs life safe and worthwhile.

  • FirstNameLastName on 23/04/2017 - 19:38

    It's tough. Wondering if it's partly why there is such a high suicide rate with vets. Could also be easy access to drugs required and maybe many vets being in isolated rural areas.. Don't know.

    This situation is one of the reasons I could never work at the death camp that is Rspca

  • Biance on 24/04/2017 - 00:25

    I was hit really hard by the loss of my dog when I was 13 (15 years ago!) and I became obsessed with an online pet loss community. It was just what I needed then, to be able to talk with like-minded people. I just did a quick google and the community is still going strong, although it looks like the website hasn't changed at all in 15 years! http://www.petlossmessageboard.com/ http://www.petloss.com/

    More generally for dealing with grief (I'm dealing with a human loss at the moment), the only advice I can give is to take some time off if you at all can. Working and pretending to be fine in front of people can be the worst thing, especially in the first week(s).

    I don't know if it's necessarily the right thing to do, but I think it helps to get all your favourite pictures into one place and you can look through them while listening to music and bawling (or even make a video set to music).

    If you/your partner still feel really affected in a month or so there are plenty of ways to see a counsellor for free - usually through your work (called EAP) or uni, for any reason and fully confidential from your employer.

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