Where Can I Buy Scott Morrison Toilet Paper? or Donald Trump Toilet Paper

I am wanting to buy some Scott Morrison toilet paper as a gift, if not Donald Trump will do. I just need it by this weekend which is the problem. Does anyone know of any physical stores that might sell this?


  • LOL, there are no such products for sale in Australia hombre. Soz.


    You could be making 'sh#t loads' of cash before you could say 'Jack Robinson hates pinkos'.

  • I never understood the whole face printed on TP thing. Never in my life have I thought "I wish Trump or Morrison's face was on my arse".

    • 'WHOOOOSH'….

      • I get that people want to buy it as a gag gift, but at least Sudoku TP makes sense. Especially for the times you forget to take your mobile in.

        • You'd use a pen that was sitting beside the toilet…?

          • @spackbace: Don't you keep a toilet pen?

            • @AdosHouse: A) how long do you spend in the loo? Get in, do the necessary, clean up and get out. I hope there is more than one toilet in your household. The banging on the door is not poltergeists.
              B) the toilet pen is “fine” until you put the end of the pen, in your mouth, whilst you concentrate.
              C) you waste a lot of Soduko puzzles without seeing them. I would get a bunch of Sudokus, from the paper, and leave them in there. Which is an interesting variant on using newsprint as TP.

              • @try2bhelpful: A) 100% is poltergeists.
                B) Honestly, have never put a pen in my mouth when concentrating.
                C) It's not really waste if it still wipes your arse.

                • @AdosHouse: A) did make me LOL.

                  B) you may not notice. Most people do though. If I went to someone’s house and saw a pen in the loo, the “ewww” factor would kick in.
                  Reminds me of an old joke.
                  Did you hear about the constipated mathematician?
                  He worked it out with a pencil.

                  C) these novelty toilet papers tend to be expensive, per sheet. They are usually just a “joke” purchase. I prefer cheaper, and softer for “that end” of me.
                  Although expensive, and full of crap, is an apt description for Trump.

                  • @try2bhelpful: B) Yeah I agree, I wouldn't have anything in the toilet apart from some toilet cleaner.

                    • @AdosHouse: I was talking about the “loo” as a room, rather than the actual porcelain receptacle itself; but you might want some water and the “poo” and “wee”, as the Bowel cancer screening people so quaintly call it, going in the receptacle as well. I wondered who those graphic images, on the back of public loos, were aimed at :).

                      • @try2bhelpful: Sorry, I meant toilet as in the room. My toilet has it's own room, and it's not part of the bathroom. So I am used to calling that room the toilet.

                        • @AdosHouse: My downstairs toilet is a separate room, as well. I just find the concept of spending any second longer, than the requisite amount of time, somewhat bizarre. People who use their phones or iPads sitting on the loo is just “ick”.

          • @spackbace: You could always improvise with brown ink

    • Had a roll of Santa TP in a bathroom at our place, and held a party for about 20 people.
      Plenty of people used the bathroom; no-one said a thing.

  • Got some over Christmas at catch of the day store in highpoint victoria

  • Wife bought me a Trump toilet brush from a discount store. Orange bristles and all. Toilet is now cleaned very frequently.

  • From graffiti when at uni, above a roll of toilet paper:
    "Free photo of ****. Instructions, tear off sheet, to develop, wipe".
    If you are unable to get the required TP, print this on a sticker, add to a roll of plain white.