I have been looking after my child since birth. My wife is the one working. She took off work for a year, returned to work part time. Then off completely until our child turned 3. Since then I have been a full time carer. No pre-school, yet but that is changing in few weeks.
Meanwhile I had been in academia and graduated with a doctorate a year ago after over a decade of on/off/away/part time. Life happened.
Located in inner Sydney having moved from Canberra last year. Ask away!
I don't see parenting a job so yes. I am enjoying many parts of it, such as time spent with my child, having not to think or worry about a job.
Have people, especially your wife, treated you with less respect since you became SAHD?
How do you keep yourself occupied when the baby is asleep or with her mum?
That was then, my child is almost 5 soon. Back then it was on the thesis. I've had almost no social life in the last 5 years come to think of it.
Why have you not had a social life?
Which streaming service is best for kids shows?
ABC iView (ABC Kids)
We noticed earlier on that any screen time results in tension and poor sleep.
So we minimised it to almost elimination. We don't have a TV. There were periods where we'd play Franklin and Friends, Kipper the dog, Pingu all off Youtube. We also had Netflix for a couple of shows. But never a movie, never a TV show until about she's 3 when we introduced ABC Play School occasionally.
In a week she'll probably have no more than an hour of screen time and that's until now.
BTW no smart device given.
You worried that by delaying the introduction of technology that they are missing out on hardwiring all the relevant synapses or whatever that give other babies and toddlers an advantage when they grow up? Or do you kinda want that, for them to be more like old fashioned humans who don't experience technology as a natural extension of themselves.
Screen time isn’t really going to benefit a child/toddlers brain development…quite the opposite actually
@Dlw: I'd imagine it's a mix of benefits and negatives. There must be a lot of research on it by now too, you'd think. Unless you can deprive a control child of technology then I don't think it's really possible to do a full experiment.
What activities do you do with you child if there’s no screen time? I can’t survive without it.
But on the plus side, we do know my kids vocabulary is way ahead of others his age, might due to the screen. Hard to tell.
What's your favourite pizza topping?
It better not be pineapple
It varies. I make my own pizzas BTW (worked in the industry way back). Salami I guess? There was a butcher in Brunswick /VIC who made sensational beef salami. I think he passed away many years ago and did not pass on his spice recipe to anyone.
Located in inner Sydney having moved from Canberra last year
Do you own a house or mortgage?
Thankfully renting in Sydney and got my landlord to accept a 25% reduction for resigning another year.
Mortgage for our place in Canberra which is rented out.
Did you go to bed straight after starting this thread?
I feel fortunate to also be a stay at home dad for last 15 months, but with three teens (15,16,18) and a wife who has been FT WFH since March I haven't been on my own as much as last year. Makes it harder to do surprise stuff
.
Yes I did!
Teens would be great to have. Few years ago, before I had a child, I looked after my nephews/nieces, it's like having best friends and good times (house chores become easy too!).
Do you do all the cooking and cleaning?
Where do you go for morning coffee with the SHD?
How do you fit in your golf day while the missus is at work?
Yes, all cooking, cleaning, shopping, etc. The works.
Morning coffee has always been at home with my wife. Haven't met any SHD.
I don't play golf. But I have few things to keep me occupied. A bit into photography I guess?
How big is your active wear collection?
Not sure if you consider casual tshirts and shorts as active wear? I have nothing but that except for a Boss suite somewhere and a couple business shirts. My wardrobe is 2 dozens of Esprit tshirts (some are polo).
How many Mum friends have you made?
One. I have met many. But I think the reluctance by some to engage in anything more than chit-chat makes it hard to establish a connection. I have gone to so many meetups/events where I would be the odd dad
Congrats on the doctorate. Thesis title?
That would definitely identify me :) Think of industrial policy, qualitative methods combined with System Dynamics modelling, and a specific Australian industry as case-study.
Googling the above will not show any of my published work/thesis.
What field was your thesis in (business, economics, law)? Was it a PhD? What career opportunities were there after you completed the doctorate?
Been doing the same for the last 15 years.
Turns out my wife is much better at making money than me and I'm better at running the homestead than she is. :)
That sounds amazing!
Yeah it's worked out pretty well and I do as much as possible so the Mrs doesn't have to worry about anything after she gets home from work. Equal division of labour and all that.
Do mothers flirt with you? Wait till school starts.
Will keep you posted. But I doubt any mother will want to flirt with me
Is there a daddy’s group, like you see moms hang out during the day?
Or just hang out at OzB forums?
stay at home dad, the new catch phrase trending today on the internets best describe a male like this is a SIMP?
Wow. Rare to see someone with such fragile self esteem post in public.
I was the stay at home dad for the first 6 months but it drove me mad. I’m a bit of a socialite, needed someone to talk to, ended up putting my kid into daycare and went back to work full time. I feel my kid is learning a lot more being at daycare and I appreciate the time we get together a lot more.
Kids certainly learn more watching others do.
Do you find your kid will not be as socially outgoing when they finally get around other kids?
Actually my child is more outgoing that most kids we meet. Once she establishes a connection with a person (whether adult or child) she's talkative, interactive.
Do you like Canberra more than Sydney?
Yes I prefer Canberra over any other city. Although with a child, Sydney is far more versatile.
If you could go back ten years and do it all over again, would you do anything different?
Hindsight is such a beautiful thing. Not getting married until after finishing my research. Everything else wold have fallen into place.
How do I convince my wife to let me be a stay at home dad?
If you must to convince your wife then you might want to think your options
Do you have hots for Yellow Wiggles or Purple Wiggles?
How are the "mothers" groups now?
I did Mr Mum for 3months in 1998 & 2002.
1998 was Glebe / Balmain and there was 1 other guy there occasionally and the women were inclusive and welcoming.
2002 was near Hurstville and I was shut out. One woman even told me that if her husband saw her talking to me he would want to fight me (WTF?). It was a very lonely period.
On the plus side, I bonded with my 2 girls really well. I'd recommend it to any dad.
Well done good on you guys! nice to see when families can effectively structure things, without being chained by standards.
Mandatory question I guess - are you actually enjoying this arrangement, or just OK with it because it's better for the family?