How do I attain the motivation to become a macho macho man?

I am a member to my local gym for over half a year now and I find that it is difficult to go there consistently possibly due to motivational issues. How do I stop my spontaneity?

closed Comments

  • +1

    Man up.

    • I always seem to hear that as 'man the f up'.

  • +8

    get a goal. work towards something. see results. profit

    u can't force someone to give u motivation. u gotta find it in yourself

  • +4

    cell-tech

  • +4

    Just imagine what you will look like at the bath house.

  • I'm in the same boat. I'd recommend getting a PT for 4-5 sessions

    • +6

      PTs are quite expensive though, but then they motivate you to do these things.

      Another alternative is to get a friend who is motivated at it and help you out.


      For me, I like to exercise to music(edm), and try to out-do others at my gym(a bad type of motivation, but it works lol)

      Don't expect results overnight, work on it over a few months and yourself and others will notice.

    • +14

      Do it the ozbargain way, have a work out NEXT to a personal trainer

  • +3

    terahammer is right, goals are brilliant eg: My Goal is powerlifting comp in November :)

    Once you get into the routine of going it becomes, well.. for myself, the most enjoyable part of the day

    • +1 once you get into the swing of things, you'll find that it is such a therapeutic thing that its almost addictive. Only benefits and no side-effects. :)

      Be careful, start slow and don't overdo things.

  • +5

    Routine. Make it a non-negotiable part of your daily life…it will soon become entrenched.

    Balance that with some simple behavioural modification, token economies work great towards the goal setting others have rightly suggested.

  • +17

    Just wait for a Kindle book to be posted on this topic. :)

  • +1

    I find watching this gives me inspiration

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AO43p2Wqc08

  • +1

    What is it about going to the gym that you actually like? I mean, if you don't like going, why do you go?

    • Follow the Zyzz ideology, think about the bitches mirin and guys getting jelly.

      • +9

        Eat clen, Tren hard, die in sauna.

        • +2

          Think you forgot 'pump roids'.

      • +1

        Zyzz idealogy:

        Pump roids, post videos of yourself talking like a dipshit, pump roids, troll on bb misc forum, die young.

        /meh

        • +1

          YOLO

  • +12

    Everything helps:

    • Train with friends who are motivated and will push you to work harder
    • Set a goal, I wanted to lose weight for my girlfriend and that was a huge motivator for me.
    • Take it easy, don't rush in. A lot of people power charge the first month and then never go again. Slow and steady and work yourself up to the big guns.
    • Make it a part of your daily habit where it's Accessible; don't force yourself to get up at hours of the morning you hate when you won't enjoy it.
    • Eat better, a healthier diet is more motivating and gives you more energy. I found when I cut back on the quantity of food I was eating I had More energy.
    • Mix up your workouts; exercise to music, exercise outside, find what feel the most rewarding.
    • +1

      Some damn good advice right there…

      • +2

        Take advice from the Doc ;)

  • +2

    So many wasted words here.

    Use steroids.

    • Seven wasted words up there.

      Steroids won't help you unless you work out HARD!

      • +6

        They'll still help; shrivelled nuts, mega zits & mood swings count as gains don't they? :p

        • Take it you have never taken gear before?

        • +3

          do you even lift?

  • Find some other sport that will keep you fit or interested on its own, or which will benefit from gym sessions.

  • If you want to get stronger, you need to lift heavy. And eat more too. Best part of my day is lunch. Eating carbs!

    • that is not true. You can still get strong without lifting heavy weights. If you want to bulk up, then you need to lift heavy weights. There is a big difference.

      • +5

        No dude, you eat more to bulk up. You lift heavy to get stronger

        • -3

          +1 gotbean.

          High reps lower weights increase muscle endurance and recovery. Lifting heavy makes you strong.

  • +1

    The serious answer for you is reading Tom Venuto's "Burn the fat, feed the muscle" thank me in a years time ;)

  • +5

    Are you single? If so (or even if not lol), find the hottest chick in the gym - do some research to find out when she works out during the week and head over at the same time. You don't want to be standing behind her and drooling like a total perve, but just use it as your benchmark for when to work out.

    Some other perhaps less exciting ones ways to motivate might be: set a specific goal; find a partner to train with; concentrate on things at the gym you are GOOD at. Nothing worse than setting or following a workout that has lifts/movements you aren't really good at. Eventually you'll want to hit those weaknesses, but to get you into a rhythm and feeling good, enjoy your strengths.

    • +7

      Well that's the creepiest thing I've read on OB today.

      • +1

        You're not trying hard enough ;)

  • +11

    I'm going to reinforce some of the things others have said and give examples from my own experience

    1. Train with someone else. In my case I belong to a running club. I know that these guys (and women!) will be waiting at the start point 5 days a week, and they'll be happy to see me. I think about the training when I'm there, but the thought of seeing my friends is what gets me there

    2. Have a goal. I started fairly small, decided I could do a half marathon and trained for that. My mate beat me by 1 minute which kept me going. Then I started setting ridiculous goals just to see if I could.

    3. Don't change too much too soon. Get the training happening, then make small changes to diet. I still eat KFC, but only when I've done a major race. After a while your diet will get better by itself because you won't want to undo the good training you are doing. Training first, put down the pie later.

    4. Do you want to look big to pick up chicks, or do you want it for yourself? Changing your body will make you feel better, and that confidence will help you with the ladies (or guys). If you just do it for the roots, you may get into a relationship with a hottie, let yourself go, then get dumped. Do it for the right reasons. I had good success with the ladeez even when I was fat. A fit dickhead is still a dickhead. If you're one of these 'I'm a nice guy why can't the women see that' then your problem is self confidence not lack of guns. But guns will help a bit, or a lot if you get your head right.

    I'm a runner, I don't have massive muscles. But I'm so happy because I've lost 25kg, I'm happily married with a great kid. I am super fit, just completed my 3rd 100km race and prepping for a 175km race later this year. Fitness is responsible for a lot of my happiness. You can do the same. I wish you luck on your journey

    • +3

      Bloody hell, 100km? You must have good knees.

    • +1

      Great encouraging post Kaos. Good on you!

    • +7

      … just completed my 3rd 100km race and prepping for a 175km race later this year.

      That's it, i'm off to get a pizza.

  • +2

    Look at pictures of other guys that you'd like to look like and use that to be your motivation. You might think this is gay, but it works for many.

    Buying supplements also helps because it increases your determination to work out and get results.

    • absolutely not gay.

  • +3

    OK, you're a member at a local gym.

    You'll find that your member stays pretty much the same size, regardless of how big you are. This means that if you're a fat bastard, your member will appear relatively small. If you're ripped & lean, and not too bulky, your member will appear relatively large. That is the wonder of science in action.

    If that's not enough to motivate you, i don't think i can help you, except to suggest that you perhaps kick sand in your own face and declare "i'll show him!".

    Good luck!

    • *edit,

      NVM

  • +4

    Here's my serious answer.

    1. Gym's are batshit boring. Simple as that, except when there's some fit chicks to look at. I say 'chicks' as i'm not long out of the cave. So it helps to mix it up a bit - not all gym, but pool training (doesn't have to be swimming - perhaps a flotation device & jog in the pool), speed walking, etc.

    2. It helps to know that you're getting somewhere to maintain motivation, so keep a diary to keep track of where you're at. For example if you're going for a certain weight, monitor your weight & keep a chart if you think it will help.

    3. Diet is critical depending on what you are seeking to achieve. 7 cubic whatevers of sugar has about the same energy content as 1 cubic whatevers of fat. The takeaway message: avoid fat. The really lean looking guys got that way by being very careful with their diet - exercise is important but is secondary, if that's what you're seeking.

    But then wtf would i know - i'm wholly unqualified.

    • +1

      yeah.. 100% agree especially about the diet part. Tried chicken breast with bit of salt and some salads for 3 weeks for lunch & dinner, eggs for breaky. Seriously, I never knew chicken breast can be so disgusting.

      • surely spices are not calorific!!! i've been on and off chicken breast for the past 6 months, majority of the time ON. the only reason i find it disgusting is towards the end of the week, when the cooked chicken is about 4-5 days old…

  • +1

    I bought Protein and Creatine and so to not waste my money, I used that as motivation to gym 3 days/wk.

    Also them mirror shots when you see gradual improvement. I am the most aesthetic being in the world, but you can use being second as motivation.

  • +4

    I heard about similar stories thousands of times. My humble opinion is that if you are not a gym junkie, don't bother. It is almost certain to be a waste of money. How many people actually ever go to gym after even paying the annual fee?

    The trick is go and find a sport you enjoy. Before you say that you are not into sports, you might want to think about how many sports you can name. I am sure everyone of us can name several dozens of sports. Are you sure none of them strikes your fancy? Did you try them? I bet if you spend one month or two seriously looking, you are set to find one you like.

    Great advantages of participating sports are:
    1) Because that is something you like, you are motivated. You don't need all of those tricks to motivate you. You just cannot have enough. In fact, if you find a sport you like, you would be more worried about how to fit that sport as much as possible in your spare time!
    2) People you do sports with, sporting club managers/organisers, etc sincerely care about you making progress. They are not after your money. They often go out of their way to help you because they care about the sport. It is possible that they might even waive your fees if you are financially stressed. This is fundamentally different from gym and your personal trainers. It is a business for them. Their goal is to profit from you.
    3) Participating in sports is a great way to meet new friends and widen your social circle.

    I never passed any PE test when I was in school. I blame the PE course was not properly instructed. It should be about helping people exploring sports and find the right sport for each one of us. About ten years ago, I found this obscure sport - squash. I have been hooked since. I simply cannot have enough. No need to seek motivation etc. I have to instead remind myself that I need to take rest and it is not healthy to over do it. Although I could not pass any PE test when I was in school, I am very confident that I can now out run 99% of people of my age group. I am 100% fat free and I can eat anything I like because I know I will burn them off. Trust me. Give it go. Find a sport you like. It works.

    • -1

      Dat Wall o' Text.

    • +5

      Yeah, i'll buy most of that, but then again depends what the OPs objectives are - he hasn't exactly spelt that out, not to mention that i've assumed he's a bloke.

      I played squash once. Other guy hit me in the head with his racket once when he was going for the rubber thingy. I suggested he might want to avoid that, but his position was that if my head was in the way, then too bad. That made me feel like putting him in a horizontal position and stepping on his head, but instead decided to preserve my awesome rack of teeth and try something different.

      Just my invaluable contribution's worth.

    • +2

      100% fat free? Lies

      • +1

        0% body fat….that would be disgusting. not to mention dead.

  • +1

    loving the suggestions here, maybe OP can let us know if we're on the right track? Just a word about diet and supplements. You might think that FreckleNuts and I would be opposed on diet- he says get diet right first, I say don't worry about it. You have to figure out what works for you. I am an eater, I if given a choice between pizza and a run, these days I would roll that pizza up and take it for a run and end up with a very greasy face.

    My caution about changing too much at once has its roots in Alcoholics Anonymous. They recognise that if you focus on changing one thing at a time it is more likely to be sustainable. Rather than giving up ciggies, booze, coffee, soft drink and doughnuts and becoming a monk. They believe that cutting out the booze and THEN working on the other stuff is more likely to bring long term success. That's the way it worked for me, but you may be different.

    Supplements. The general consensus is that you should have some carbs and protein after a workout. And this does seem to aid recovery. BUT- I spoke to a guy at a party (university researcher in some form of athletic nutrition studies) who said that if you want to lose weight you should do your work out, then eat nothing for 1-2 hours. Makes sense- this way your body has no choice but to burn fat. And you're training your system to burn fat more efficiently. Anyway I tried it and it seems to work, and did not seem to hinder recovery much if at all. Try exercising without supplements- you don't need them, and they might make you fat if you use them incorrectly.

    Abs- if you want a 6 pack, you'll have to diet. These aren't very big muscles, and working them hard won't make them stand out much. They key to seeing them is body fat- I'm told that 12% body fat you can start to see them, I start to see a 4 pack at 8% body fat. That was hard work!

    Thanks for the upvotes people- I was a fat unhealthy 36 year old, not a runner until 3 years ago. Last week aged 45 I ran from the Opera House to Gosford. Didn't make it to Gosford (24km short) but to be honest, I'm amazed that my body can do these things. You can too. But you need to start!

    • You might think that FreckleNuts and I would be opposed on diet- he says get diet right first, I say don't worry about it.

      Not quite.

      I said, depending on his aims, diet can be more critical cf exercise. In my experience if i am seeking to achieve a certain weight, diet has most influence - don't get the diet right and you can train all day and still be a fat slob. But nor do i underestimate the value of exercise - it can help with motivation in relation to diet. But hey, i'm not too sure what the OP's trying to achieve…

      But yes, a gradual transformation is what works, and knowing how to recover quickly from the inevitable setbacks.

      If you're really serious, and want to fast-track the whole show, Bamboozle is probably on the right track - talk to the professionals, not unidentifiable dicks like me on OB.

  • +3

    Most of the body building blokes I know have virtually no time for anything else. At any given moment during the day they are thinking about their next workout, or next meal of chicken breasts and egg whites. Ironically, a former flatmate of mine who was in top nick physically had trouble keeping a girl because they get sick of having to accommodate their dietary restrictions and workout schedule.

    I could never bother with that sort of effort. For me, I try and eat well and keep my weight around the 83 kg mark which is within the normal BMI range. I think its a case of setting goals for yourself that are realistic and reasonable.

    • "Most of the body building blokes I know have virtually no time for anything else. At any given moment during the day they are thinking about their next workout, or next meal of chicken breasts and egg whites. Ironically, a former flatmate of mine who was in top nick physically had trouble keeping a girl because they get sick of having to accommodate their dietary restrictions and workout schedule."

      That describes so many dounut people i know

    • +1

      fyi BMI means nothing when you take into account muscle

    • +1

      You are everything i hate about gym culture

    • +1

      I assume this is a gimmick account (the gimmick being a severe head injury)

    • +2

      Jyzz is that you?

    • I have not idea what that means, but my personal view is if someone can't construct a decent intelligible sentence, then there's a good chance the content (if decipherable) has limited value.

  • +2

    I was going to post some golden nuggets, completely based on hard science that are nothing like what's been posted here, but have now chosen not to elaborate. This is because I started to see the retard gym types post nonsensical and risky BS, that should be enough to make anyone flip the bird at building muscle and do something else.

    All I'm going to say is, make an appointment with a psychologist and get a referral to a psychiatrist. The psychologist (which will be free under medicare for 6 visits) will help you work on your thinking, give you homework etc, and the psychiatrist will likely give you something to help with your motivation, if you really feel it is an issue.

    All the best.

    • Yeah, that could work given the OP's express concerns relate to motivation.

  • first rule - You cannot out-exercise mcdonalds or Hungry Jack or KFC.

    Self motivation is easier said than done. I find group exercise helps in such cases. some people I met swear by crossfit. I would like to but personally I have not tried it. Those who do seem to be in good shape. However they rave on about it exhibiting cult like behaviour so I was hesitant to try it, plus I am tightarse about paying for it plus my normal gym. and there is no crossfit gym near me.

    • IIFYM - if it fits your macros. anything can work IIFYM. i have peanut butter and curry chicken every workout day as part of lunch. it's the tastiest thing in the world. i also have icecream, cheesecake etc. not fat

      • lucky you with the awesome metabolism ;)

        • not quite. it's just as easy as knowing how much protein/carbs/fat you should be eating per day and eating food that suits your ratios!

          you could eat a pack of tim tams a day and not gain weight!

  • Check out this video from Eliott Hulse

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UR5hchS1gSA

  • i prefer a swimmer's body over gym junkie's body.

    • What if the swimmer spent more time on his body than the 'gym Junkie'?

      • +1

        Not sure what u mean exactly by 'spending more time on his body', but swimmer's physique is generally lean and toned, athletic looking. They can't have too much rock hard muscles as it adds resistance in water. Body builders on the other hand look rather scary. I'm sure if you do a poll asking women which they prefer, most would say swimmer's body.

        • +1

          If you're doing it for girls, you are doing it for the wrong reasons. That is all.

  • +3

    One word : Commitment!

    Motivation can come and go so it's useless

    You have to be committed to go to the gym no matter what happens, unless if there's an Earthquake, meteor strike, or zombie plague which preventing you from going to the gym. You also need a program to get where you wanna be, and you need a goal - something that you can measure such as "I want to increase my upper arm size to 18 inches" or something like that.

    • +2

      Prepare the night before: food, alarm times in phone for when to eat. If you are finding it boring to do your workout at the gym check out the class timetable. Pick a pump class or whatever and put an alarm in your phone an hour before to get to this class. Have a mantra that you can lean on. Mine is "it's a mental game". For me this means no matter how sore, how tired, whatever better options come along; you need this for a good life and everything will be better if you do it. Those 3 words get my head right. Pick your own words that work for you and lean on them. Talk to yourself. If you are sore pick an easier class and work at your own pace. Congratulate yourself for turning up. Most people don't.

  • Quit facebook, hit the gym, get a lawyer

  • Now, i'm just going out on a limb here, but i reckon we're talking amongst ourselves as the OP has split.

    • +2

      We've motivated him… ;)

  • +2

    I don't really get your question "How do I stop my spontaneity".

    I assume you are a man, and nothing is more motivating for straight men then the opposite sex.

    I suggest you buy 2 full size life-like blow up dolls - whether they be sexual or not is up to you. One should be a size 6 or so, the other a size 16-20.
    On days which you have gone to the gym and eaten fairly cleanly, you go to bed with the size 6 doll.
    On the days which you do not, you sleep with the massive doll.

    It is a metaphor for life…

    • +2

      I may be somewhat naive, but wasn't the purpose of the exercise to actually decrease the OP's reliance on blow-up dolls??? ;)

      • +2

        Aah… Master Stewball… you are putting the cart before the whores… The real women will come once the student becomes the master.

        If a bear shits in the woods and no one's around, does it still make a sound?

        You are now enlightened my son…

  • I am motivated by the fact that I've paid for the membership. I always make sure to go at least 4 times a week. I go even in the rain, heatwave, storm, etc. LOL

    Another motivation is by looking at other girl with fit looking body and think to myself " I can definitely have that body too if I work hard every week". I think sometimes I stare too much at those girls they starting to think that I am gay and interested in them :D

    • +2

      …by looking at other girl with fit looking body and think to myself " I can definitely have that body …

      Yeah. I know what you mean. I often think that i can definitely have a fit looking girls body, but then it turns out they don't like my jokes & the prospect is dead as a Dodo.

  • +2

    I had trouble motivating myself to get to the gym, especially after I started working full-time because there aren't any near me that have decent weight setups and I'm usually too tired to travel to one anyway.

    So I ended up buying a home gym set from Rebel Sport and for a few hundred dollars I got one with an adjustable bench with barbell holder (allowing for bench-press, incline bench press, and squats), lateral pulldown and preacher curl accessories, and a leg press. I managed to fit this thing in the 1.5m x 1.5m space at the foot of my bed.

    I based a routine around this set incorporating barbell and dumbbells and put it into an iPhone app called iFitness which provides fancy graphs displaying weights, sets, reps etc as you go. Being at home means I can chuck on a documentary or TV show on my laptop to semi-watch while I workout which makes things less boring.

    So taking this route is worth thinking about if you have the space and money (though it's probably cheaper than a few years of gym membership).

  • +1

    A lot of misinformed information here, many advising 100% fat free, I won't bother to get involved though. People making steroid jokes? Its funny because the average person doesn't even know a naturals potential before dismissing others hardwork for 'steroids'. This is where it will really kick your butt because all you are saying is their goals aren't within your reach when infact they are natural. /brb 99% of guys in my gym are big and I will never obtain such a physique because they all use steriods. I have a couple of words for you but Shirley I'd get banned.

    Only tips I can give.(bodybuilders + fitness fanatics)
    Only champions will make it to the top.
    I am a firm believer you should keep to a routine for at least 21 days because that's what they believe the mindset of a new routine kicks in.
    Do not do it for the opposite sex, I see girls at my gym always there scouting potential, a.k.a (aerona) and guys who do it potentially become vain and pretentious but that's a given as you get addicted to getting size the longer you are in the gym because all you want is to self-improve from there.

    Next biggest tip is diet. Just worry about eating enough clean or not, living long is overrated anyways.

    In response to finding motivation for the gym, I honestly believe there had to be an underlying reason. Whether that's the satisfaction of sporting achievements(fun) + hate (kai Greene documentary Google this) or rivalry (not so good but works) find your reasons and take it to the next level you light weight..

  • There are a lot of silly comments in response to a serious question. Everyone's different, but I found group fitness classes to be highly motivating. Find out if your gym does Les Mills Bodypump - you might think its a bit girly, but trust me, it's not. There are few things more motivating than seeing someone who looks weaker than you make an exercise look easy.

    As an added bonus, a certain number of the women who do these classes are smokin' hot.

    Give it a go for about 5 sessions and see if you're motivated to go back.

  • Are you overweight or a skinny dude? Which direction you're going have different challenges. I went through the same journey from the overweight side. It was tough and hard, 8 years a still counting. I only really made progress in the last 4 years of that. I've managed to keep the fat off in that last 4 years and started to slowly put on muscle mass in the last 2.

    I've made a lot of mistakes, which would account for such a long journey. All I can say is it is not just about the gym, it is about your lifestyle as well, i.e. how you eat, how much you let your body rest and de-stress, etc.

  • Why do you want to be a "macho man"? What would be different if you were a "macho man"?

    • getting hot chicks

      • +2

        For you: getting hot fembots

      • bahahaha this is not the case any more… the hot chicks want the guy who is weaker than them so they dont feel threatened… Well this is what my friends say and 98% of my friends are female, and its true they all have partners who have a hard time lifting a loaf of bread

        • Not True! I broke up with my ex mainly because he was weaker than me. He couldn't even run a kilometre without stopping few times to catch his breath :D

      • Cuddling up to a buff guy is like cuddling up to a warm slab of concrete:( If u want to get chicks (hot or otherwise), develop a sense of humour. Funny is irresistibly sexy!!!

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