[April Fools] Uranium Ore US $39.95 (was $59.95) + $41.23 Shipping - AU ~$81 @ Amazon

OldBugger on 01/04/2015 - 14:04

Moved to Forum: Original Link

  • Radioactive Ore Sample (NORM)
  • License Exempt
  • Useful for testing Geiger counters and performing nuclear experiments
  • Radioactive minerals are for educational and scientific use only.

I have been using this product for a while now in my experiments and it is now at around $81 delivered. I would prefer a higher CPM, however these samples vary wildly and it is possible to receive a substantially higher grade. This is where the Nuclear Radiation Detector Meter comes in handy.

3.8 out of 5 star reviews. You have to weed your way through the joke reviews but some honest and helpful examples are below (which also reflect the product's varied uses):

Magic stuff. Been taking 1 spoon a day for 3 weeks.

Wow! all I can say is, my teeth have never been cleaner!

Mixed this in with rose fertilizer and have blooms nearly one foot in diameter!

But it is only appropriate to show some cautions too:

I thought I was ordering Uranium 235. This stuff is not fissionable

No warning on the label.

I was very disappointed to have my uranium confiscated at the airport. It was a gift for my son for his birthday.

My daughter got a hold of this and accidentally dropped it in the cemetery down the street from us

General Discussion April Fool's Day

Related Stores

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closed Comments

  • homersyd on 01/04/2015 - 14:07
    +11

    But is it made in Japan?!

    • Kossac on 01/04/2015 - 14:34
      +1

      Godzilla

      • scrimshaw on 01/04/2015 - 14:36
        +12

        Do you want Godzilla? Because this is how you get Godzilla.

    • Vortex99 on 01/04/2015 - 14:36
      -1

      Sushi anyone?

    • suchis on 01/04/2015 - 15:17

      I think you will find this is The Made in China Eneloop Uranium

    • daydream on 01/04/2015 - 15:25
      +8

      Surely we should learn our lessons from the frozen berry saga and buy our uranium locally?! Let's try and keep jobs in Australia too. I don't want hep A or e.coli in my uranium.

    • [Deactivated] on 01/04/2015 - 19:38

      I'm kinda confused since the listing has been running for years and there are verified purchase reviews that claim it's real. A few mention it's not quite as highly radioactive as claimed.

      • DreadEmperor on 02/04/2015 - 02:15
        +1

        The april fools is that whilst it's perfectly legal within the USA to buy Uranium off Amazon, it's illegal for Aussies to like-wise.

  • btiltman on 01/04/2015 - 14:08
    +1

    HMMM…. what date is it today?

  • Mobe1969 on 01/04/2015 - 14:09
    +42

    LOL, funny feedback.
    "I purchased this product 4.47 Billion Years ago and when I opened it today, it was half empty."

    Nearly as good as that male hair removal product at Amazon UK. Don't read at work. I end up crying reading it.
    http://www.amazon.co.uk/product-reviews/B000KKNQBK

    • stingy-oz on 01/04/2015 - 14:16
      +6

      I almost died laughing……….. OMG…I should have taken this advise of not reading it at work…

      • Overtime2000 on 01/04/2015 - 14:29
        +3

        oh crap, omg, i just died coz internet.
        damn that is funny

        • vinc on 01/04/2015 - 14:47
          +4

          “DO NOT PUT ON KNOB AND BOLLOCKS.”
          hahaha…LMAO..

    • AlexD on 01/04/2015 - 15:09
      +3

      Almost as good as one of our own's soup review a bit over a year ago…

      • cannedhams on 01/04/2015 - 21:35
        +3

        None of my posts have ever gotten many recs since. I must have peaked with the soup.

        • AlexD on 02/04/2015 - 08:47

          In fairness, everyone probably thought you'd died afterwards, from severe flatulence or otherwise…

    • strangeloops66 on 01/04/2015 - 15:10
      +3

      This was probably and hopefully the only time in my life I was going to wish there was a gay snowman in the kitchen which should give you some idea of the depths I was willing to sink to in order to ease the pain.

      John W Osborne Jr., take a bow. I think my tear ducts exploded.

  • vincesuarez on 01/04/2015 - 14:12

    So… can you build something in particular with it?

  • nocure on 01/04/2015 - 14:13
    -1

    Does it come with a free diamond pickaxe?

  • Nilfunds on 01/04/2015 - 14:17
    +4

    do the ship to Iraq?

  • [Deactivated] on 01/04/2015 - 14:17
    +3

    Had a tin for lunch. Didnt taste bad.

    • OldBugger on 01/04/2015 - 14:46
      +1

      What does it taste like? I know it doesn't any allergens like nuts though and is gluten free.

      • [Deactivated] on 01/04/2015 - 15:33
        +4

        Didnt taste like anything whilst eating it. But all my senses were significantly amplified as a result.
        Eyes - I can usually only see people inside the buildings a block a way, but now able to see people inside buildings within a radius of 10kms.
        Smell - My colleague on a different floor is definitely hiding big chocolate egg in her bag, i can smell it from my desk
        Hearing - Heard the crickets from the garden screaming!
        Taste - I can taste every single mineral from the tap water
        Touch - Just manage touched a few metal plates and dented all of them

        Not sure if these are side effects.

        • [Deactivated] on 01/04/2015 - 15:37

          Update: been farting out green gas since i've had it

        • btiltman on 01/04/2015 - 15:54
          +3

          @googleyahoo69: are you sure that's only been since you ate the product. I have heard rumours….

  • geremyfarr on 01/04/2015 - 14:17
    +4

    Just be careful guys.. it's past its expiration date!… oh wait.. it indicates your expiration date…

  • Ry009 on 01/04/2015 - 14:21
    +4

    Are you telling me…this sucker is nuclear?!

  • btiltman on 01/04/2015 - 14:22
    +1

    I am looking for a good price on the optional "Handling Pack"

    http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyclopedia/images/a/ae…

  • zappa on 01/04/2015 - 14:24

    Perfect for Tasmanians.

  • Vortex99 on 01/04/2015 - 14:31
    +1

    Speaking of things radioactive.. Half Life update is available for free

  • TheDoctor on 01/04/2015 - 14:34
    +1

    I am more interested in what experiments OP is conducting…

  • hollykryten on 01/04/2015 - 14:36

    Not sure how safe this is. The tin says radioactive content. The certificate says if it's crushed it can become hazardous.

    Surely this is not legal for a consumer person to import this into Australia.

    • Happy501 on 01/04/2015 - 14:43

      Kitchen knives, petrol filled jerry cans and Roundup are pretty dangerous too.

      • hollykryten on 01/04/2015 - 14:44

        Except there is a radioactive substances restriction in Australian Customs. No import permit for this = potential large fine.

        So don't be silly and try to import this into Australia through customs without an import permit.

        • mskeggs on 01/04/2015 - 14:55

          This is a sample used to test and calibrate instruments. If you ingested it, it possibly could give you a cancer if it lodged in your body.
          It isn't dangerous if you keep it outside your body, much like a bread knife.
          If you are concerned about this level of radiation, I recommend you remove your smoke alarms and forego any x-rays.

        • hollykryten on 01/04/2015 - 14:56

          @mskeggs:

          Says on the certificate that if the substance gets crushed it may become hazardous.

          Also it says on the Australian Customs web site restricted import list that any substance that has radioactivity is banned without an import permit for it. This has a measured level of radioactivity. In other words banned from import without permit. I don't think a lot of people here would have an import permit.

        • mskeggs on 01/04/2015 - 14:59
          +1

          @hollykryten:
          Yes, because if it is in a fine particulate it could be inhaled or ingested. As a lump of rock it is easy to keep track of. This is literally a little lump of uranium ore just like that found in the ground in various parts of Australia.
          It's value is that somebody has counted the radioactivity of this particular sample, allowing it to be used to check your geiger counter is working.
          Like the odometer check signs along the motorway, which could also be dangerous it you crashed into one.

        • Happy501 on 01/04/2015 - 14:59

          Yeah thats a fair point. I don't know exactly what the custom laws are regarding this pretty cool item. I don't find much dangerous in the country and when i do it is generally some government rule.

        • hollykryten on 01/04/2015 - 15:02
          -1

          @Happy501:

          Iron ore would be classed by Australian Customs as a substance with a level of measured radioactivity. Need an import permit for some thing in that class. It's spelled out under the Radioactive substances under the Australian Customs Prohibited and restricted imports web page. You can't just import some thing which says Radioactive content on the package no matter what it is.

        • mskeggs on 01/04/2015 - 15:29
          +1

          @hollykryten:
          Looking at the customs site is does ban radioactives and doesn't specify a lower limit. The issue is, that means you can't import any physical item, as all metals (for example) are ever so slightly radioactive. As is the air we breathe or water we drink if we were to follow the letter of the law.
          This item is pretty harmless. You can see the photo of somebody handling the rock to test the radioactivity. They are touching it with bare hands.
          Since they allow the import of smoke detectors without permit, it is a bit inconsistent if they stopped this rock.

        • hollykryten on 01/04/2015 - 16:10

          @mskeggs:

          It means you can't import a substance that contains any radioactivity. I mean the fact that it has radioactive content written on the package may get red flagged by customs and ceased.

        • mskeggs on 01/04/2015 - 16:19
          +2

          @hollykryten:
          I think you are missing the nuance.
          Everything is mildly radioactive, it is just a question of how carefully you measure

    • fattyboombatty on 01/04/2015 - 14:45
      +12

      I bet you're heaps of fun at parties

  • hollykryten on 01/04/2015 - 14:40

    Yes. I would believe this is a restricted import would fall under the Customs radiative substances restriction. Since this does have radioactivity. Don't try and import this through Australian customs, people. It's a prohibited import without a permit. I mean geez it says on the tin Radioactive content. Would be a huge red flag to customs. Be a good way to get Australian Customs into a real panic coming across some thing saying Radioactive with the radioactive symbol on it and in return a potential huge fine.

    "Radioactive substances (restricted import)
    Description:

    Radioactive substances including any radioactive material or substance including radium, any radioactive isotope or any article containing radioactive material or substance."

    http://www.customs.gov.au/site/page4369.asp

    • eug on 01/04/2015 - 14:52
      +2

      I wonder if we can import ionization smoke alarms.

      • mskeggs on 01/04/2015 - 15:30

        The rules don't appear to make an exception for them, but there is a tariff listed, so I bet they wouldn't stop them

  • mapleice on 01/04/2015 - 14:40
    +4

    Anyone got a link for a Delorean? I need one to order along with this.

  • Black Hole on 01/04/2015 - 14:42
    +1

    This is so cheap. Must be the surplus coming out from the US defense nuclear program. Many use for it. Help to sterilised your house - gems and pests.

  • hollykryten on 01/04/2015 - 14:48
    +3

    Oh i see it's april fools day. haha

    • btiltman on 01/04/2015 - 14:49
      +1

      Yep…. haha

      • hollykryten on 01/04/2015 - 14:51
        +1

        Yep, they got me. I thought this thread was actually serious!.

  • smartazz104 on 01/04/2015 - 14:49
    +2

    Finally and at a good price too; was getting tiresome having to use shoddy bomb casings filled with used pinball machine parts to get a hold of uranium ore.

    • Ry009 on 01/04/2015 - 15:34
      +1

      Who did you supply?

      • smartazz104 on 01/04/2015 - 15:36
        +2

        Who do you think? The Libyans!

        • Ry009 on 01/04/2015 - 15:45
          +1

          This is heavy.

        • smartazz104 on 01/04/2015 - 16:09
          +1

          @chiefer:

          Weight has nothing to do with it…

  • joeno on 01/04/2015 - 14:54
    +5

    Ukrainian women? Where?

    • Ry009 on 02/04/2015 - 11:46

      Took me a while…but underrated post :)

  • tc4101 on 01/04/2015 - 15:01
    +1

    the price is where the Aprils fool joke is

  • Make it so on 01/04/2015 - 15:02
    +6

    All these world leaders wasting their time negotiating on whether Iran can have Uranium when they could have just ordered from Amazon.

  • captbollocks on 01/04/2015 - 15:03
    +3

    Adds a little oooomph to that peanut butter sandwich.

    Highly recommended.

  • Cluster on 01/04/2015 - 15:05

    Funny thing is you can buy real uranium ore online, from ebay and other sites. It's called Autunite (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Autunite) and is about 50% uranium by weight. Makes a geiger counter sing rather nicely and looks pretty under UV light.

  • OG Puppy Banana on 01/04/2015 - 15:07
    +1

    So… If I buy some of this product then rub some on a pidgon I find on a park bench, will I get a Pidgey and can I evolve it to a Pidgeotte?

    If it can't eveolve… this isn't even remotely a bargain…

  • scrimshaw on 01/04/2015 - 15:07
    +1

    A camera lens infused with thorium is just as, if not more, radioactive than this uranium ore sample.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=FW…

  • siggy213 on 01/04/2015 - 15:13
    +3

    Has anyone looked at the 'Customer Questions & Answers' section for this product?

    If I opt for air mail does it get delivered by Amazone Prime Air or CIA drones?

    A:
    No sir, just give us your coordinate and we will deliver it via intercontinental missile in less than an hour, guaranteed speed.

  • Herbse on 01/04/2015 - 15:31

    Was hoping for the depleted model. Damn

    • eug on 01/04/2015 - 17:21
      +1

      Just wait till the Uranium Ore S comes out next year.

  • mostlygordon on 01/04/2015 - 15:31

    Shame all my reactors are fusion otherwise I'd buy tonnes of this…

    • btiltman on 01/04/2015 - 15:51

      If you buy this you get a coupon for 20% off a fusion reactor from Japan

      • scrimshaw on 01/04/2015 - 16:03

        I don't want refurbished products..

  • watwatwat on 01/04/2015 - 15:43

    Bonus points if you try to carry this into an airport.

  • roseyhead on 01/04/2015 - 16:06
    +1

    Customers Who Viewed This Item Also Viewed:
    Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 Gallon
    The 2009-2014 Outlook for Wood Toilet Seats in Greater China (ebook)
    How to Avoid Huge Ships (Paperback)

    • OldBugger on 01/04/2015 - 16:41
      +2

      How to Avoid Huge Ships is an excellent and gripping read! Some reviews:

      • As the father of two teenagers, I found this book invaluable. I'm sure other parents here can empathize when I say I shudder at the thought of the increasing presence of huge ships in the lives my children.

      • I make a living by hitting things with my Huge Ship. This book is absolutely DESTROYING my business! Please do not buy this!

      • This book was "written by an old captain who was tired of running over fools in their pleasure boats, and wanted to educate those same fools in a futile effort to save their lives".

      • Mobe1969 on 01/04/2015 - 16:48
        +1

        LOL. I love this one:

        "I live near a park and frequently walk around the local area. Given the amount of dog mess that is on the pavements I thought this book would be the ideal read to stop me having to scrape my shoes on the grass before going home. It was only after it arrived that I looked closely at the title and realised it said 'How to Avoid Huge SHIPS'. A simple error that means I am still treading on massive examples of canine excrement. Having said that, I read the book anyway, and I'm pleased to say I'm not even having near misses with huge ships anymore. No sir, they aint getting anywhere near me!"

  • Black Hole on 01/04/2015 - 16:22
    +1

    I am an ozbargain by nature. I have bought a few cans so to setup a mini-reactor at home to power my house for life. The saving from the electric/gas billed will do me well to fund for my ozbargain habit.

  • Clementt on 01/04/2015 - 16:57

    This product caused me to attend anger management class.
    First, I just use this as a hair gel, then I start to glow like a green light bulbs in the dark.
    Then I started to fall unconscious most of the time when I am angry.
    I woke up naked, I realised I have smashed whatever around me and my clothes is torn.
    So I bought a camera to monitor what happened. Turn out when I am angry, I turn into a green monster.
    Soon, I was advice to attend anger management class. Also, I always tell people who try to pissed me off "Don't make me angry, you wouldn't like me when I'm angry."

    At less, now I am busy filming somewhere and am still using this product.
    Give it a try.. You might like it..

  • mister_snrub on 01/04/2015 - 18:23
    -1

    What a useless product. Activity is measured in becquerels or curies. A reading in counts per minute means nothing without knowing the efficiency of the detector used to measure it.

    All this will do is tell you if your detector is working or not, but not how accurate it is. But you could do that by simply turning it on and measuring the background radiation!

  • echelon6 on 01/04/2015 - 18:33

    i actually bought this

    what now

    • buckster on 01/04/2015 - 19:30
      +1

      Grow a third testicle by putting it in your pocket?

  • NeggerOfDeals on 01/04/2015 - 19:02
    +4

    Customs seized it and the AFP busted down my door. I'm typing this from a holding cell. Please send help.

    • eug on 01/04/2015 - 19:05

      You shouldn't be holding cell. Aren't you afraid of radiation?

    • Serapis on 01/04/2015 - 21:40

      By the power of Ozbargain… Unite!

      We shall begin with a pre-emptive strike on their Facebook page, that should teach them

  • ceebee on 01/04/2015 - 19:03
    +1

    I'm on my all natural minerals kick ('cause I like to be healthy) and I got this last month and all I can say is ugh! Don't buy this. I thought it was Uranium 238, which has a 4.7 billion year half life, but it's Uranium 235!!! It only has a half-life of 700 million years. I hate buying stuff so close to expiry! Bad deal!

  • Neatoboy on 01/04/2015 - 21:10
    +2

    I like this review:

    "I purchased this along with 4 turtles and a rat. 18 years worth of karate lessons later, I finally feel safe to leave my house at night."

  • DEvok on 02/04/2015 - 00:19
    -1

    Wouldn't risk it, having cops waiting at the front door.

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