Too Scared to Use My Expensive Wallet

So my girlfriend purchased me a Burberry wallet for my 21st birthday. This was 6 months ago and to this day I haven't gone further than opening the box and inspecting the wallet. I've considered using it multiple times but I just can't bring myself to the fact that I could potentially lose, damage or just drop food/liquid on a ~$600 wallet. I feel bad not using it but I'd also feel bad using it.

What should I do?

Conclusion:

Wow, I did not expect this to get this many responses. Many are ignorant and reek of jealousy but the majority are genuinely helpful responses that helped me make up my mind. I've decided that I will start using the wallet. Thank you to all for your help, I knew I could count on OzB!

Comments

  • +3

    Your girlfriend is an idiot for buying a $600 wallet TBH, dump her sell the wallet and buy a new one (girlfriend).

  • +1

    How much longer will one need a wallet for is what I am starting to think now. As soon as CBA gets Apple pay and Opal is on Iphone I think I will be walletless. I have a nice Tumi wallet but a lot of the time prefer to just carry the few cards for those that don't take amex and therefore amex apple pay and any cash I may have on me. All loyalty cards are on stocard. The longer you hold that Gucci wallet the less resell valua there may be or it may just forever stay in the box if everything goes digital.

  • +2

    I still have a Burberry wallet bought a few years ago, I did use it everyday as my main wallet in the UK as British wallet sizes can fully fit £20 notes inside it as they're larger than Australian currency notes. Most Australian wallets will leave parts of the pound sterling notes hanging outside of the wallet and it's never a good thing to show other people in public how much cash you're carrying about.

    A few posts above allude to this but I've previously discussed with friends the point of buying protective cases for phones/tablets/cameras/etc to protect it from scratches. The main reasons why people take protective care:

    1. Selling the item second-hand at some point in the future, so keeping it close to pristine condition enhances it's re-sale value.

    2. Personal pride in carefully maintaining their possessions. Nobody wants to drive around in a dented/scratched car if it can be avoided by taking preventative measures. Some people take pride for themselves knowing they take good care of their personal property. Other people take pride from what other people think of you when they see your device/camera in good condition or bad condition.

    Designer goods also adhere to this (except maybe designer check-in luggage which goes through plenty of wear-and-tear, but that's a separate discussion). If you're not planning to sell the wallet in the future, are you worried if you scratch/tear the wallet what you'll think of yourself, what your GF thinks of you or what other people will think of you? An example to think about - if you were given a Ferrari would you keep it in the garage the whole time or would you want to take it for a spin every now and again?

    If you do end up using the wallet instead of storing it in your closet for the rest of it's future lifetime, just be sure to treat it well. Burberry wallet stitching is very good and the material is quite strong so the wallet should last you many years. That said, only people who worked in the fashion industry or attend London Fashion Week have ever commented on my wallet in Europe and nobody in Australia has ever noticed the Burberry pattern on my wallet.

    Some tips for taking good care of it:

    • Don't put it in your rear trouser/jeans pockets as you'll often end up sitting on it and placing undue stress on the wallet.
    • If you wear a suit to work or jacket in the evenings put the wallet inside the inner jacket pocket as the pocket lining is usually made of a softer material.
    • Don't put anything else in your wallet pocket like keys or a phone - movement will generate friction between the items and usually end up scratching the outside of the wallet. Most scratches on wallets and phones are usually the result of metal keys in your pocket.
    • Also be sure to check the surface of anything you put your wallet on, beer garden/picnic table surfaces can sometimes be rough on wallets.
    • How can you put a phone in your wallet ?

  • -1

    Some people just have too much time to think…

    • -1

      Of course. It's a nasty side effect of being privileged first world society.

  • +1

    ultimately a thing is just a thing. think why she bought it. feel the love. use it. karma tends to work without your ability to control everything in the world so that you are always safe and secure. be balanced if you get good karma [wallet] and then stay the same if something you don't like happens. meditate on impermanace, the lack of soul for things, and the relative suffering which follows pleasure inevitably.
    anicca anatta dukka as the mindfulness mantra from the Buddha says.

  • +2

    Real man don't "scare" of anything, lol

  • +2

    Use it for rare occasions if you want but she bought it so you could use it. My sister bought me an expensive wallet and it lasted 10 years, reminding me every time I used it that it was a gift from her

  • +1

    LOL $600 is about my monthly living expenses

  • +1

    its just "stuff". we are here to live our lives, not to just buy and adore "stuff". in 10 years time when that wallet is old\no longer in fashion, you wont care for it at all, and will wonder why you were scared to use it in the first place.

  • +2

    Be careful storing your wallet for another day. I bought two pairs of shoes, each about $130 down from $250. I stored the second pair in the cupboard for 2 years before it came time to use them. When i used them, the leather cracked up and they basically fell apart within the first week.

    Lesson learned, dont store things, just use them.

    The exception is eneloop batteries because of their extremely low self discharge rate. I recommended buying up on these at any opportunity.

  • It comes down to how you high you judge yourself and being comfortable with it.
    It takes time but you'll get there and start using it eventually.

    I was purchasing cheap wallets before (non branded but good looking ones) until wife bought me a LV 2 yrs ago.
    Was bit hesitant at start but now absolute love it - the quality of material makes it look good and last a lot longer.

    If you are worry about loosing it, just put it into real life scenario, i.e. have you actually lost your wallet before? Does changing it to Burberry significantly increases your chance of loosing your wallet? I guess both is no.

    Definitely suggest you use it day in day out so there's less chance of you forgetting or loosing it.
    Also put minimal cards/cash in it so it keeps its shape and will last longer.

    Good luck.

  • How often do you lose your wallet?

  • +1

    If you can't look past the price point of an item then don't use it, and see how she feels about it.

    You're a man FFS so act like it. The lady has given you a gift of a wallet, then make the proper use of it. To hell with what if BS scenarios, and long list of do's / don't other pedantic fools adhere to.

    It may last you 1 day or 10 years, so instead of worry about it just use it.

  • +3

    LOL normal reaction to first luxury item. Giving time and buying more, you will be more comfortable. 😜

  • +1

    items are meant to be used. Luxury or not. My first "luxury" wallet was a Bally which I purchased for $450 bucks in 2011.

    I'm still using it today and although it's old. I still love it because it has been with me for 6 years! The scratches add character.

    Make sure you're happy with the purchase and you'll never have a second thought of replacing it.

  • Ask yourself - have you every lost or damaged a wallet previously? I'd say use it and enjoy the quality.

  • +1

    its called patina

  • I always say.

    Why spend big money on a wallet when you can fill a cheap one.

  • +1

    All of the comments of why spend a lot of money on wallet are ignorant. You buy quality. The same can be said about most things. Why buy a rolex when you can buy a casio watch, why buy hugo boss shoes when yoy can buy hush puppies etc. Just use the wallet and enjoy it. Btw i have a bvlgari wallet and i love it. Men dont have many accessories they spend money on so why not spoil yourself. My previous bvlgari wallet lasted well over 10 years and I just changed it because i wanted a new one. Don't less these tight arses spoil your fun. Also your girlfriend obviously has good taste so she is a keeper.

    • +3

      Or maybe the girlfriend is a huge spender which might be warning signs to what is to come with marriage.

    • +1

      True words. Quality & it makes you feel good - why not? Same with watches.

    • What's the point in spending all that money on something that is never seen?

      When you wear a $10K watch, nice shoes or an expensive tailored suit - it is on display 100% of the time you're wearing it.

      A wallet lives in your pocket. The only time you pull it out is when you pay for something.

      I can understand if you're a millionaire, rockin' it in Monaco, driving Bentley and you need the best of everything, but the OP is a wage earning pleb whose girlfriend has wasted $600 on a wallet that none of his friends will even realise is worth a pretty penny. And this wallet hasn't made the OP 'feel good'. In fact, the opposite. He's too scared to use it because it may get damaged!

      • +1

        Yeah but at the end if the day a rolex just tells thd time like a casio watch. What about women who spend thousands on a wedding dress. Are they also wasting their money because it will be only worn once. My brother in law spent 25k on engagement ring which i thought was a waste of money. The most important thing is to spend your money on whatever you think is worth it.

      • +1

        It's not always about being seen for everyone. Like a woman who buys lingerie from Victoria's Secret - not KMart. It doesn't matter what his friends think. My LV's going on 7 years this year and looks new, will probably go another 7. Unlike the crappy leather wallet that I bought year-after-year, and admire the craftsmanship and quality of my LV. OP came looking for advice knowing the crowd on here are most likely older and wiser. When he is more mature he won't care so much.

  • +4

    I think that you need to use it.

    From your description, it sounds like the moral dilemma is about you and how you feel about using an object worth so much, but functionally so little. To this point I agree, but it's not about the wallet, it's about your girlfriend and making sure that you appreciate her generosity more than your frugal morals.

    Frugal people like talking returns so I'll have a go.

    She outlayed a $600 investment in your happiness. happiness is not entirely tangible to people who talk dollars, but it means a lot to her. Clearly, she will measure the success on her investment based on your appreciation of the wallet and its use. Clearly, for as long as it's in the wardrobe, she will be feeling disappointing on both you and herself (most likely covertly). As someone you presumably love, is it fair to disappoint your missus because you think $600 is too much for an everyday device that doesn't even need to cost $20 to serve its function.

    Use it, mate. Be grateful for the gift and return the gratitude by using it. The longer it sits in the wardrobe, the more damage than good it'll do.

    • Wise words. Keep the girl happy.

  • Honestly I'd tell her you haven't used it because you cherish it so much and it's from her. So you just want to keep it in peak condition. Up to you if you use it. LV goods retain value. I would use it though, life if short and here to be enjoyed.

  • It's expensive but not classy so you might as well use it.

    Burberry should be reserved for their signature trench coats only. The same as purchasing leather goods (luggage) from LV.

  • You should use it, you might be worried about 'wasting' it by using it and subjecting it to normal wear and tear, but you're wasting it even more by not using it for it's intended purpose. What else could you do with it, put it in a display case? Hardly.

    I was in a similar situation when my fiance bought me $600 pair of Tom Ford prescriptions glasses to replace the 7 year old no name brand ones I got when I was still a teen, but I didn't give it a second thought, they're for wearing. Though I do limit the Tom Ford $360 perfumes to one spray a day, I never had a problem with Brut spray on from Coles lol

  • Use it and enjoy it, life is too short not to.

  • +1

    3 words…

    just use it

  • +3

    Man up and use it. I'm sure she'd like to see you using it. She possibly thinks you are tight so she thought she spoil you.

  • Think about your cost per use. If you use it every day for 10 years, it cost the same as a cheap wallet you used for a few months. So better start using it! And if you're really paranoid add it to your contents insurance (portable goods).

  • Chill Down, it's only a wallet there could be other more pressing matters to worry about in life rather than an expensive wallet.

    ~chant 3 times "hero appears!, Hero Appears! HERO APPEARS!" and your problems will go away.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgH0yHz-Hs

    *ANIME 2015 of the year

  • +1

    Put two or three crisp $100 bills in there and just use the wallet. Look after it the same as you would any wallet - it has your cash, cards and ID in there after all.

    Don't spend the $100's unless it's an emergency. You'll feel rich every time you take it out of your pocket.

  • +1

    Your poor gf is probably sad that you never use it

  • Let me look after it for you and when you want to start using it I will send it back. Out of sight, out of mind.

  • +2

    Be a man and decide this for yourself.

    Your gf should dump you just for asking this on Ozbargain.

  • Many mobile phones are more expensive than $600. Just use the wallet.

    If you are worried, just check online for care instructions before using it for first time.

  • -4

    Wow, I did not expect this to get this many responses. Many are ignorant and reek of jealousy but the majority are genuinely helpful responses that helped me make up my mind. I've decided that I will start using the wallet. Thank you to all for your help, I knew I could count on OzB!

    • +2

      LOL reek of jealousy?
      To be honest, I think you're just fishing for responses.

      We're just laughing at you for asking such a stupid question.
      This a trivial matter and you should learn how to be a man and decide this for yourself.
      It's just a wallet and like many have said, a mobile phone is probably worth more than $600.
      Yet you have no trouble carrying that around, why is that?

      Your girlfriend should really dump you for being such an indecisive little boy.
      You're 21, but you act like a teenage girl.

      • -5

        Once again, I can smell it from here :) I can also smell the neck beard.

      • What's 9 + 10 ?

    • Good decision.

  • +2

    It's only a burbery dude…just use it. Thats the whole point of having a wallet. You remind me of one of those blokes who buys a nice car but lets it sit in the garage the whole time.

  • I bought my other half a Bally wallet (~$500). He understands that it's just a wallet and uses it everyday. I wish he would look after it just a bit better though (he wanted a brightly coloured wallet).

  • If she bought you an iPhone would you use it? of course you would so use it.

    It's like having a nice car, watch, etc. but not using it.

    She did not buy it for you to do nothing with it.

    Also if you want to be in the good books for a long time show her that the first thing you are putting in it is a photo of both of you together… you can thank me later~

  • ffs just use it! Its not going to appreciate in value in a few years, nor is it going to be a heirloom in the family. Here's hoping by virtue of just being an expensive wallet you will take care of it more than any other cheapie.

    • You do know he's just looking for the right responses?

      He wants us to tell him how jealous we are because he got a $600 wallet from his gf.

      • Oh i see, i should have deleted the first word from my comment then.

  • This is the very definition of a first world problem. I'm glad you decided to use it though. Nice things are meant to be appreciated by using them, not hiding them away.

  • I am in quite opposite situation. I got a LV wallet as a gift six years back and it reached end of its life span a couple of years ago. I bought new wallets couple of times to replace it. Each time I took out the money and thought of thowing it away I decide to keep it for few more months and end up gifting the new wallet to a friend of cousin.

  • +1

    See it the other way. If you get 5 years out of it, it's worth 30c per day. If you don't use it, you just lose the whole $600 value collecting dust.
    I've got a cheaper Burberry (~$200 at sale) used for >6 years now, showing only very slight wearing.

  • +2

    I hope your fancy wallet matches your hand bag..

  • -1

    Maybe wrap up the outside in clear contact to keep it nice and pristine.

  • get a cheaper wallet for everyday use and only bring out the burberry wallet to special occasions like weddings, formal dinners, company dinners etc..?
    def dont sell a birthday gift especially from your GF mate.

  • +5

    I am an avid saver of money, a frugal miser. However, people often think that I won't spend money on something expensive. This is not the case at all, for me, its all about VALUE FOR MONEY.

    Its for this reason I use my good Royal Doulton dinner set and formal boxed Tablekraft cutlery set to eat EVERY DAY - I can't stand the thought of not getting good value out of them.

    They are good quality and I like using them, and of course, I got the dinner set on clearance at the factory outlet and the cutlery on a big end of financial year stocktake sale (+ other combined card savings)! ….I'm on OzB for a reason.

    Its a similar concept I've never understood to permanently using a "car bra" or putting sheets on your car seats &/or sofa full time to protect them, or people who leave ugly protective plastic on their tech gear and appliances - who are you preserving them looking good for if you never see them!? Get the value out of your purchases or they were actually not a good buy at all!

    Bottom Line - Its a gift, you aren't going to sell it, use it (but look after it)!

  • First world problem.

  • +2

    Life is short, and precarious. Someone has bought you a lovely gift. Use it. If it gets, lost, damaged so be it.

    There is no point having been given something beautiful and then not using it.

    And if I was your girlfriend having purchased this said beautiful item. Deep down I'd be extremely hurt that it was being left in a draw to just gather dust.

    People have the attitude that they should be saving all their good things to only use on special occasions. Every day is special. Every day you have on earth is special. It's over in the blink of an eye. And, it stands to reason that you should use all your 'good' things. Otherwise it's best to just pack it all and give it to a poor person who'll be grateful for it and use it, every single day.

    And a little tip here…. don't sell it. You're very likely to become an ex-boyfriend. That's just my personal opinion though.

  • You're not waiting incase you and the lass break up, and can then ebay it for $400 are you laddy? LOL

  • For some brand like LV, gucci prada hermes there is an active second hand market. Not sure about burberry though. Anyway my wife always sell the items she has there and if you calculate it actually a pretty cheap hobby.

    My friend wife have make good money buying hermes birkin bag over the year from different countries and sell it once back home and the items design replaced. She knows her stuff ofcourse and already known as avid collector in hermes shop so can buy limited edition. The price of these things will make mercedez cry.

  • For some brand like LV, gucci prada hermes there is an active second hand market. Not sure about burberry though. Anyway my wife always sell the items she has there and if you calculate it actually a pretty cheap hobby.

    My friend wife have make good money buying hermes birkin bag over the year from different countries and sell it once back home and the items design replaced. She knows her stuff ofcourse and already known as avid collector in hermes shop so can buy limited edition. The price of these things will make mercedez cry.

  • reminds me of this quote "Not driving your car to keep the resale value high Is like not banging your Girlfriend to keep her fresh for the next guy"

    life's too short, just use the damm wallet

  • -1

    Don't you have anything else to worry about beside "scare" of using you $600 gift wallet ? Typical Asian kid ?

  • Use it dude. Beautiful things are meant to be used/worn.

    I'm assuming it's leather, pick yourself up a decent leather conditioner & apply it when the leather feels dry. It's a wallet so it's not going to get scuffed up like shoes. If you're worried about wet damage from sweat/rain/spilled drinks I guess you could try a water resistant spray, but I wouldn't be too fussed about that.

  • I've got a plain LV too - I use the ex girlfriends burberry though as it has a coin section with zip, whereas the new LV is sleek and name engraved - all nice but not as practical on holidays.

    While locally in Aus i've gotten accustomed to a card wallet of just my cards, i guess any cash i slip into the notes section and empty it promptly after arriving home - so coins are never an issue locally. I just won't use it on holidays.

    TO each their own - but agreed, if you never use it, unless it's your wedding gift or something really sentimental, IMO even a 21st bday is still, one day going to be a birthday, and so a wallet is going to degrade anyway. Might as well whip it out in the future for special events , i.e. weddings?

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