• long running

Home Paternity Test Kit (1x Child and 1x Alleged Father) $160 + $30 Shipping ($0 Brisbane C&C) @ DNAQ

2101

Esteemed Cuckolds of Ozbargain. My client told me he only paid $160 for a DNA Q Paternity Test. I remember these things costing $700 plus the last time a client ordered one , that was about 10 years ago. Maybe the scientists are child labourers. I don't know.

SCHEDULE OF FEES
Categories:
All
Standard Paternity Test $160.00AUD
(1x Alleged Father, 1x Child)

Additional persons (each)$110.00AUD
(i.e. Additional Child, Additional Alleged Father)

I once had a client who had about 3 potential fathers tested for paternity. She never found the father and she was deported back to the UK.

Related Stores

DNA QLD Paternity & Immigration DNA Testing
DNA QLD Paternity & Immigration DNA Testing

Comments

  • +3

    Seems like this is the regular price for this product

  • +33

    Username checks out

  • +121

    No deal, could be more expensive depending on the result

    • +6

      Can save money on the child support?

      • +25

        Mate, even if the kid is not yours, you may still have to pay child support!
        I know some poor buggers paying child support for someone else's kids.

        Not sure how common it is, but he got screwed.

        • +6

          You can revoke it by contesting it. There are exclutions, such as adoption etc.

          I know some poor buggers paying child support for someone else's kids.

          your poor bugger needs a lawyer.

          If you think you’re not the biological father of a child Services Australia (Child Support) is assessing you to pay child support for, you can apply to a court for a declaration under s107 of the Child Support (Assessment) Act 1989.

          You’ll need to prove to the court you are not the biological father with DNA testing that complies with the regulations outlined in the Family Law Act 1975.

          • -1

            @boomramada: What if the guy was the legal husband?

            • +1

              @Bii: Legal husband has nothing to do with Child Support

        • +3

          Poor buggers? Buggery would not generally result in conception unless they're doing wrong.

        • +1

          he got screwed

          At least there's that, even if it's what got him into this situation.

    • +8

      Look on the bright side, you qualify for Family Tax Benefit Part A and Part B.

      But, honestly, it angers me how insignificant marriage is in our society. Cohabitate for 2 year and partner can shake you down for at least half of your assets. Illegitimate child, have to pay child support for the next 18 years. There is absolutely no reason to get married now other than some pretty photos (which you pay a fortune for).

      • -4

        get married now

        Sorry to break into you, but in Australia you don't need to get married to lose half of your assets, just living together will do :)

        • +3

          Thats what they said?

  • +3

    Ahahahahah

  • +45

    Who is your daddy and what does he do?

    • +35

      I’m a cop, you idiot! I’m Detective John Kimble.

  • +67

    My wife's boyfriend wants this post reported.

    • +20

      Can confirm this

      • +1

        So you are her boyfriend

  • +27

    Likely Elon Musk has driven the price down on these.

    • 😂 🥂👌

      • +29

        Is that how you spell his child's name?

  • +21

    Ah, thanks for this I have been doubting my partner's loyalty. Purchased 10 so I can prove to my wife's boyfriend that all the children are mine.

    • +16

      They still will call me daddy lol

      • +3

        Ok daddy

        • -2

          Username checks out

  • +20

    Cheaper just to ask Ralph
    Mrs. Krabappel and Principal Skinner were in the closet making babies and I saw one of the babies and the baby looked at me!

  • +4

    My wife does not consent for our* child to do this testing. Is this legal in Victoria?

    • +18

      And you wonder why

    • +5

      Does the child have the uncanny resemblance of the mailman or perhaps a friendly neighbor that is home during the day?

      • +1

        Or maybe the pizza delivery guy, I guess he delivered more than a pizza

        • Some side buns in the oven.

        • +7

          particularly potent pepperoni

      • Just install security cam and say its for safety ;)

      • Child is black

      • milkman, especially if his name happens to be Pat

    • -1

      My wife does not consent for our* child to do this testing.

      Do you know if she is really the mother too?

      • Mother's baby, father's maybe.

        "She was as pure as the driven snow"

        "Who was doin' the driving?"

    • +15

      Say its a Covid test, no Victorian can resist.

    • +1

      Escalate, sirens should be going off in your head, that's reasonable.

  • +1

    🍿🍿

  • Now everyone will know, I AM THE FATHER OF THE NATION.

    • Those child support payments sound very expensive.

      • It is coming out of your taxes.

    • There is only one

      M.K. Gandhi

      • Show me the Paternity Tests

  • +11

    "Esteemed Cuckolds of Ozbargain"
    Quick! We need to purchase this domain name!

  • +14

    This will be the best $160 spent for those paying child support for someone else's child

  • +1

    The last story made me sad :(

    • +5

      3 potential fathers, she had a good time.

      • +4

        Deported to the uk, boarder force are the father 😂

    • Why? If she's wrongfully accused three men of false paternity, good riddance I say.

  • +20

    how the hell would this work in Tasmania …

    • +1

      In my family history book I discovered people I went to school with were distant cousins. Small world.

      Btw did you see our historic wedding? They married a mainlander.

      • +11

        the family tree is a wreath

        • Or a telephone pole…

  • Only cost $3000 in South Park for a whole town to be tested.

  • My wife wanted to get this done for our kids. She seems to think that I just cloned my self.

    • +1

      she doesn't remember the labour?

      • +2

        Yeh, but she's convinced they are just purely my DNA.

        • but there's probably only a limited market where the identity of the mother of the child is being disputed

          • @shmahoo: There's always those babies swapped in hospital stories?

  • +5

    Hot damn those first two words had me guffawing!

  • +2

    So cheap. I paid $2,100 for one of these in 2018.

    • +1

      And no child care support?

      • +1

        Yes I send money every month.

        • +10

          My condolences

    • +2

      Do you get $80 back from Medicare? Lol

  • +6

    Fantastic! Now I can start my own version of The Maury Show!

    • +1

      I'm hoping we get a few Ozbargain forum posts out of this

  • Can we confirm if jv is infact Clippy's son

  • With two Ancestry Tests you get that too + additional info

  • +3

    Shit, are we all JV's

    • +12

      that's a bold accusation

  • people are removed not deported

    • ?

      • +2

        deportation is for permanent residents while removal is for unlawful non-citizens. Deportation requires courts and removal doesn't. So Department will cancel a lawful non-citizen's visa and then remove them under the Migration Act.

  • Luke Skywalker brought a 100 pack - just checking Chewbacker isn't the father…..

    • +2

      I wish he would have taken the test before he made out with his sister.

  • +6

    In just here for the, ahem, dad jokes

    • +3

      wrong Dad, move along.

  • +11

    "Esteemed Cuckolds of Ozbargain" that should be on a t-shirt, this is a very popular deal afterall.

  • +1

    Get 2 dna ancestry kits - less suspicious =)

  • a good piece of evidence to file a lawsuit against the IVF centre that did the embryo transfer.

  • +3

    Have a + just for the opening sentence 🙏

  • +6

    How much for maternity test kit?

  • +2

    A lot of hoes be bangin' in ten years

  • +1

    Are these regulated in Australia? How do we know this company isn't like this?

    https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/paternity-tests-dna-1.7164707

    ("Canadian DNA lab knew its paternity tests identified the wrong dads, but it kept selling them")

    • Maybe that's why they kept being purchased!

  • +4

    Jeez, highlighting this on OzB? Know your audience…

  • Good thing this is a long running tagged deal for the future progeny that will need to be tested.

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