OK this is the flip side of this discussion I guess.
I put a bid in on a US ebay auction a week ago did my normal thing and put in my max comfortable bid, but was pip'd in the last hours and decided to stretch my budget and upp'd my bid in the last minutes to win by $10USD (my ebay app woke me up at 4am Saturday with the 15min warning and I added a new max of $100USD on top of my previous and it basically jump up to that amount). The thing is I did not realise at the time that my new bid plus shipping took the price AUD over $1000, when I went to pay for the item immediately as I always do and Paypal had another $170USD for import and duties. This took what I had thought was going to total a little under $1400AUD to just over $1700AUD .. and I simply did not have that money available to make payment. I also honestly would not have bid had I been aware of that implication. Now when I placed my first bid I definitely saw a note with the shipping that said something like the duties and fees were included and did not see any notice when I placed the newer bid that they may then be additional. I don't blame the seller, but rather myself / eBay for not being aware .. and 4am is not a good time to spontaneously add $100USD.
I have never cancelled a bid before, and I know it is a 'contract' but I was already pushing my self financially with that last bid already, and really didn't have the money to send. I thought it over all day and then I wrote to the seller and told him that I had not expected that cost (and that I knew it was not his fault) and the options were I could not pay for it unless he waited over a week for my next paycheck or we cancel it. His reply was almost immediate and brief ' either way is fine you choose' so I emailed back and asked for it to be cancelled (said my thankyous and apologies again and pointed out there were other close bidders and he should realist and would likely get the same value) now 3 days later he has not cancelled the auction, and has not re listed another. I shot him an email last night again thanking him for offering to cancel and a link to ebays instructions on how to do it. But today still no change (remember his days are our nights so he had that email all 'day').
What should I do now? Is there a reason for the delay. Has he changed his mind and is he going to wait until it has been a week and then make me pay .. should I email PayPal before then as I have the conversation via email where he said its fine you choose?