Ozbargining My Engagement Ring! (+ Poll: "How Much Did You Spend on Your Engagement Ring?")

The Wololo Wombat on 02/11/2016 - 00:02
Last edited 02/11/2016 - 13:50

Well… if I'm honest with myself, I think my days as a single lad are numbered! I didn't really stand a chance though, she's just that kind of girl :)

My friends and family tell me not to spend too much on a ring; it's much wiser to spend $$ on a house or even a nice honeymoon! My parents think anything over 3k is excessive, my sister's husband paid just over 2k for his ring (though it's 'valued' at 7k). I know my girlfriend would just be happy to have a ring and doesn't expect anything extravagant.

But, though it's in my nature to be frugal (trust me!), I really want to make an exception for the ring! It seems a little silly, but I really want it to be something she can cherish and I want to go overboard (for once in my life!)

So I'm hoping to get her a very good quality (in terms of cut, clarity and colour) ring with a single diamond of at least 1 carat or maybe even 1.5 carats. Is that as excessive as I think it is? Maybe that's normal these days and I'm actually being stingy??

Nevertheless, I have my heart set on this (unless you can convince me otherwise!)

So, that brings me to the title of my post. How can I 'OzBargain' my engagement ring? Is there some sort of 'hack' where I can get a massive discount on a great quality ring?

So here are my thoughts, listed from worst to best (imo)

1) Generic Jeweller:
Not a good idea, retail prices, MAYBE I can get a special, but I'm skeptical.

2) Online trader:
I've heard websites like bluenile.com are pretty decent… do I have to watch out for import tax?

3) Profiting of another's misfortunes
Ok, it sounds terrible when I put it that way! But I what I mean by this is getting a second-hand ring. Or at least getting the gemstone and gold, to remelt into a custom design of my own. I figure that many gemstones from retail jewellers are recycled anyway. Gumtree or even the new 'Facebook marketplace' could be the way to go (as long as I can be sure that what I'm buying is genuine)

What's your story? What's your hack? What advice would you give to a 'young man in love' :P

P.S.
In case this matters, I'm a 26yo teacher making just over 80k p.a. when you factor in a few 'side gigs' :)

Poll Options

  • 121
    <1k
  • 241
    1-5k
  • 136
    5-10k
  • 84
    10-20k
  • 17
    20-40k
  • 41
    >40k
General Discussion

Comments

        • DKC on 03/11/2016 - 00:38
          +1

          I also bought a Tiffany ring. Yes it was expensive but no regrets. Highly recommended as it pays dividends for years after.

        • donkcat on 03/11/2016 - 11:21
          +1

          Any half reputable retailer don't sell blood diamonds, most give the conflict free guarantee. You are literally paying just for the brand at Tiffanys, they grade their own diamonds in house and won't have them GIA or AGS graded. This is such a huge conflict of interest to have the retailer grading their own diamonds. They say they do this because their standards are more strict than GIA but yet they offer no proof of that, they offer no ASET images on their diamonds which can determine performance.

    • The Wololo Wombat on 02/11/2016 - 14:02
      +3

      Haha! Thanks for the reply mate! I appreciate the passion and effort you've put into this post.

      Never in a million years would I have considered a Tiffany ring, but you make a very strong case for it (are you a salesman or a laywer?! haha). The longevity of her appreciation, the reassurance it's not a blood diamond and the absolving of her guilt for owning such an expensive product make me strongly consider it! It's probably an appreciating asset too; a family investment or heirloom.

      I'm from Brisbane, so I'll pop into the store here :) Thanks for the post!

      • ZzRice007 on 02/11/2016 - 15:55
        +3

        I can second what Skramit said. Your future self will thank your current self for taking that Tiffany investment.

        No matter what, all girls know what Tiffany is, and even when they talk to each other about where their engagement ring came from, the mention of Tiffany will earn you huge brownie points. None of them like to say mine came from online. There are other premium brands out there, eg. BVLGARI, Canturi, etc. But in terms of my personal experience, all the ladies class the Tiffany at the top of the chain.

        When I was shopping for a ring, I was also told by people that diamonds appreciate in value.(all i could think of was "blah, blah blah.. marketing..bs)

        Fast fwd 7 yrs and the Tif ring is now valued @150%. FYI, insurers will base valuations more favourably on BRANDED rings compared to other rings. Tiffany doesn't use GIA ratings but there own certification is widely accepted. I think the more important C is Clarity and Colour also, but the Cut will give you sparkle. From what i remember Tif have their own proprietary way to cut the diamonds so from what the sales guy said their final product maybe a smaller Carat compared to similar priced diamonds elsewhere, to achieve the Tif cut the original stone would have been bigger. (that I don't know if it is marketing or not, but the damn diamond sure sparkles!)

        regards,

        a guy who hates spending money on any jewellery

      • DisneyPrincess on 02/11/2016 - 22:08
        +2

        THIS IS SOO EXCITING AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU!! Haha, i LOVE how you can hear the excitement in your post…How much you really want to go against your frugal nature & ignore sane, logical advice of family and friends, so she can have something stupidly & illogically expensive but will cherish forever. This is like the stuff of movie-love!! My husband got me an engagement ring beyond our price range at the time, and I love it because I know he's the kind of person who'll buy 16kg of conditioner for 20c/packet (from an ozbargain special) but still thought it was worth spending the money to get a nice ring that I'll wear everyday, forever.

        Have you considered Canturi? They're a reputable Australian company, with all ethically sourced diamonds, and Israel Folau just proposed with a Canturi ring too!! The brisbane store is just around the corner from Tiffany's in the city. I picked my own engagement ring from Canturi in Bris and couldn't recommend them highly enough! Their after sale service really is amazing: they offer free cleans & checks as often as you want, and always offer free coffee, couch & chat each time I'm in (and before people say it's just to get more money, I've only purchased my engagement and wedding rings from there)

        My husband proposed a few years ago when we were on holidays. The week before we left he went to Tiffany's and Canturi to look at diamonds & ring designs, got info books from both & made appointments for me to pick my own ring the day we got back from holidays. He ended up proposing with a Swarovski ring, in a Tiffany's box (apparently you can just ask them and they'll give you an empty box to propose with, if you make an appointment to pick a ring together). He proposed with the whole 'down on one knee, holding out a Tiffany's box', pulled out the booklets of info and appointment times the next day, and then I had soo much fun going around to pick out my ring when we got back home.

        It definitely depends on the kind of personality of you and your soon-to-be-fiancee. Whenever I look nostalgically at my ring, I think of the time & effort spent planning, researching and physically shopping around in stores, along with the struggle of going against his frugal penny-pinching nature and that means much more than the size & physical cost of the ring…but it does help that I got a stunningly beautiful ring that I still regularly get comments on :P

        Best of luck with everything, keep us updated on the progress!!

    • FatGPT on 02/11/2016 - 17:10
      +4

      Found the Tiffany shareholder! I'm just kidding :)

    • antzz on 03/11/2016 - 18:04
      +2

      for maximum impact and minimum cost
      http://www.ebay.com/itm/Tiffany-Co-empty-black-velvet-ring-b…

      Plus your choice of ring :)

    • BargainShopaholic on 04/11/2016 - 22:58

      Upvoted! I'd love a Tiffany ring from my SO! Now how do I stealthily show him this post without being suss?

  • BigTed on 02/11/2016 - 12:40
    +3

    When I proposed I used a family heirloom ring.
    The wife had that for many years but it was getting a little fragile.
    So - eventually she nagged my tightwad defences down and I bought her a new ring.
    Got it from Cash Converters and I would definitely recommend this to others.
    The ring is beautiful, it is valued at around $3,000 - Cashies was asking $1,400 or so - negotiated them down to $999.
    Everyone was very happy.

  • slow on 02/11/2016 - 12:55
    +16

    My wife told me she would be angry if I wasted money on an engagement ring, when at that stage of our lives there were more far important things to spend money on. She chose herself a cheap $100 ring. made me love her even more.

    • edgar28 on 02/11/2016 - 13:16
      +2

      :)

    • itajac on 03/11/2016 - 17:25
      +1

      Awww,true love.

  • fruit on 02/11/2016 - 13:15
    +3

    $3.50

  • iamw0man on 02/11/2016 - 13:19
    +2

    I've had mine custom made and it was surprisingly affordable. We spent <$6k and it was a really fun process to go through each step together and see something made just how we imagined. It can be a good way to get good value for your money because you can drop or add elements that are out of your price range and select a stone within budget.

    Some good tips otherwise - select a stone a little under the carat that you want for a significant drop eg. a 1ct stone is going to be significantly more than a 0.96ct stone. Also unless she is set on diamonds, try and stay away from them for the main stone (you can still incorporate them as accents or in the band) which will drop the price too.

    • The Wololo Wombat on 02/11/2016 - 13:54

      Sweet tips! Thanks!

    • DKC on 03/11/2016 - 00:43
      +1

      I would advise the opposite. Spend a bit more to get over the 1 carat mark. If you bought 0.99 carat, it will forever be 0.99. 1.01 is always 1.01.

      • iamw0man on 03/11/2016 - 09:22
        +1

        Of course, weigh up your options and go for it what matters to you, definitely put in the extra dollars if knowing it's over a caret is what's important to you!

  • geoffs87 on 02/11/2016 - 13:20
    +9

    Yeah this is a tough one. I spent $11k, but the way i look at it, this is the one part of her life (other than me) that will be with her forever. Its nuts how when she sees a friend for the first time, every time, they squeal, hug, "show me the ring". I never realised how into it girls are… and my fiance is so immaterial its crazy!

    She wanted <$5k, i splurged - because it made me feel good, and she is VERY thankful for it. I am on a little bit more $$ than you though.

    I had it made at a family jeweller, who helped me choose and import the stone from america. I designed the ring in platinum - they had it all sorted within about 5 weeks. Insurance certificate shows the ring is almost worth twice what i paid.

    I get some people value an engagement ring low on priority - but i see it is forever, its her little statement piece to be proud about. Only been a few months, but i still catch her grinning every time she looks at it!

    Best of luck!

  • outlander on 02/11/2016 - 13:29
    +9

    Where's the option to cast it yourself? On the side of a firey mountain, pouring all your cruelty and malice into it?
    Honestly. Kids these days..

    • The Wololo Wombat on 02/11/2016 - 13:53
      +6

      I tried this a few times. But a couple of bloody Hobbits keep thwarting my efforts….

  • Donaldhump on 02/11/2016 - 13:33
    +1

    spent heaps on a ring ~12k, hopefully it is real. Did this in place of an expensive wedding, in fact never had wedding yet.

    ring should go up i assume in price…

    • hellbound on 03/11/2016 - 11:16
      +1

      Rings will go up in price, your ring will not increase in value. Resale value of rings is very low.

  • The Wololo Wombat on 02/11/2016 - 13:52
    +4

    PS. Whoever is spending over 40k on an engagement ring, please comment! What's your story and situation? Are you 'trolling the poll' or are you for real?!?

    • methdd on 03/11/2016 - 07:47
      -1

      I was 24 and this was about 15 years ago. All I owned out of uni was a Subaru WRX and it was worth about $30k. I sold the car and spent the entire amount on a diamond. I can't remember the exact specs but somewhere along the lines of VVS1, E, 1.6 carats.

      The ring was important to me as at the time I was doing a jewellery apprenticeship and was into that sort of stuff.

      15 years have past and I don't regret it at all. It was a hit back when i was young but it's easy to recover at the same time. We now live in a 1,5 mil house that's almost debt free and I've got all the cars and bikes I want, as well as two kids and a happy family.

      The engagement ring is so important for "most" girls. It's something that cannot be understated. I've read somewheee that 3-4 months salary is a good indicator for the amount one should spend on an e-ring.

      • downbythecreek on 03/11/2016 - 08:02
        +3

        Suckered in by the diamond cartels marketing I see.

        • methdd on 03/11/2016 - 12:07
          +1

          Like many luxuries in life from cars to housing and even foods you eat. It's your decision how much you want to spend.

      • stonkered on 03/11/2016 - 09:39
        +1

        3-4 months salary? Gee, I wonder where that figure would have come from!? If you don't spend 3 to 4 months salary you don't love your fiancée. Ridiculous.

  • geoffs87 on 02/11/2016 - 14:10
    +3

    would love to see the poll presented in a pie chart in a couple days.

    Note to self, present poll as a pie chart in a couple days, and post on here.

  • Calmago on 02/11/2016 - 14:20
    +2

    I'd recommend getting a ring made. The value of a custom ring vs. off the shelf is much higher. Not only that but it's a one off which makes it a little special.

    I proposed to my wife with a $20 special in Hawaii. Gave her a budget of 5 Grand and got a fantastic ring made from a Jeweler. That ring in a retail shop would have been nearly double. He also made the wedding ring, which matches the engagement.

  • Moredhel on 02/11/2016 - 14:27
    +3

    We spent $1200 each on our engagement rings, white gold and diamond.
    We chose the design together and went to a jeweller who could make it for us then paid for both and split the bill.

    Personally I dislike genuine diamonds and would rather go with a synthetic diamond or a different stone altogether.

    I think spending more than $2k is ludicrous and would rather save the money on the ring in order to spend it on something more useful like the house,
    or something more memorable like an international holiday.
    Thankfully my partner completely agrees :D

    Statistical analysis also highly correlates expensive rings and weddings with shorter marriages,
    basically if your priorities are jewellery and clothing then the relationship is going to suffer.

    I'd recommend going to a non-chain jeweller and getting something unique custom made at a reasonable price,
    don't let them convince you that "these materials are premium and much better than mass produced items" to justify their cost,
    just leave and find a jeweller who isn't looking to screw you.

    • stonkered on 03/11/2016 - 09:42
      +1

      So men get engagement rings nowadays? (Granted, could be lesos).

  • Tech and cars on 02/11/2016 - 14:28
    +2

    If you're in Brisbane:

    Diamonds international have 40% off their entire range twice a year. It's an actual sale. Not one of those "rugs a million closing down sales"… It's worth looking at.

    Couple things to consider:

    -How the ring makes her feel. If it's an online store, I feel like it loses that 'special' ness.

    If it's from a nice store (Tiffany is a bit excessive) but when you are walking together past the shops, it's always nice to talk about, "I went there to get your ring"…

    -I really liked diamonds international - it has a really nice premium feel to the store. Every time I'm in the shopping centre with my wife, we can just pop in and get it cleaned for free. Cleaning/taking care of the ring is very important. Rings get dirty very easily and keeping them professionally cleaned makes a HUGE difference to the diamond. If you don't take care of it, you may as well not bother with a high clarity diamond. They always happy to clean it for you, and it's nice to be able to go back to a store where they take care of it for you.

    -Blue nile etc while you may be getting the best 'value for money' with the clearest/lowest imperfections/biggest diamond, part of the experience is getting the service afterwards to take care of it and choosing something that you really like. I don't know about you, but I just instantly think "cheap/bargain" when it comes to online purchases, and I feel personally that an engagement ring should not have any connotations remotely related to that (even if it's something technically better value for money).

    All the best with the proposal. You sound like a great guy mate! I'm sure regardless of what you do, your partner will appreciate it.

  • ExtraSalt on 02/11/2016 - 14:43
    +1

    After doing a bit of research, i found that a lot of the commeccial jewelers like Prouds all th eway to Angus and Coote use pretty basic and dirty diamonds. i ended up buying the actual ring at one of those stores and found a smaller jeweler to install a diamond which was a VVS1 D Colour diamond….it was quite a bit considering the size, but the clarity was awesome and it came out very well.'

    When the time comes…It really doesn't matter how much you spend.

  • CLoSeR on 02/11/2016 - 14:56
    +2

    I used Whiteflash who are based in Texas, excellent high quality diamonds.

    http://www.whiteflash.com

    You won't pay import duties, only GST.

  • donkcat on 02/11/2016 - 15:11
    +2

    Like you I wanted to go overboard on this for once, it took a lot of convincing myself to make the purchase for a diamond that cost me 8k (10k with the ring) but it's what she wanted and I wanted to ensure I got a quality diamond. Yes it could go towards a honeymoon etc but then she doesn't question me if I purchase a car I don't really need (V8) that I would lose 10k on in resale in a few years anyway, if this is her luxury to have for life then I'm happy to pay that price.

    I have just bought a diamond from whiteflash online, they offer 30 day returns, lifetime buyback (they will buy back the diamond for 70% of what you paid) and lifetime upgrade where they will buy the diamond of you for 100% of the price paid if you decide to upgrade to a diamond of greater value).

    You need to figure out what she is after though, what cut is she after and what ring setting? Go into a few jewelers and see what she likes, ask the jeweler to show you a D colored diamond and then get them to show you a H and see if she can tell the difference because you will save quite a bit having a near-colorless diamond than a colorless diamond. Educate yourself and learn the 4cs and what is most important to your SO and where to sacrifice. Try and stick to GIA or AGS certified as they're the two most reputable grading labs in the world.

    A lot of people recommend BlueNile but the more you learn about diamonds you realize that they don't provide enough information to determine if the diamond is a dud or not, they don't offer 360º videos like jamesallen and others.

    Everyone loves going on about how they bought a diamond for X amount and had it valued for a lot more as though they got some great deal when the truth is there aren't really many bargains to have in the diamond world, on most occasions you get what you pay for and with the exception of being ripped off by a bricks and mortar store there is normally a very good reason one diamond costs more than another. It's not in your interest to have a diamond valued for more than you paid as it just means your insurance will cost more.

  • jellykingdom on 02/11/2016 - 15:18
    +1

    I would suggest a manufacturing jeweller. They will be able to customise you a nice ring from their collections and you have the benefit of saying you hand-crafted a ring for her. Mine had about 200 different moulds available to choose from, so fairly unique. Then they will adjust to suit band width, stone sizes, etc, and you can pick colours, gem types to make it something special. They'll give you a full GIA certifiation as well for your insurance purposes

    DO NOT goto a generic Zamels etc type of jeweller. Do a quick visit and you'll find the diamonds are smaller and worse quality (4C's) and the same price . Absolute rip off

    Stores like Tiffanys will absolutely ream you because of the exclusivity. A friend roughly told me the "designer ring" was going to be the equivalent of 20% more than the identical generic ring

    This is a slightly harder one - if you know anyone who works for Rio Tinto, you can get the fancy pink diamonds etc for cheap. I had a friend who offered, and its literally wholesale price. I just wasn't sure about the whole process with the jeweller so decided against it

    • jellykingdom on 02/11/2016 - 15:19
      +2

      And the manufacturing jeweller will then also usually do you a deal for matching wedding band and one for you too….though my wedding band is literally a $12 stainless ring from ebay so I ozbargained the shit out of that

  • FunkyChunky1 on 02/11/2016 - 15:24
    +7

    Hi ! I'm a single lad too, but when I get propose I've heard of this idea. It's not traditional, but i've heard plenty of people do it.

    Propose with a cheap ring like $10 from diva or something; she'll get the surprise and whatnot, but then you two can pick out a ring later together. This isn't a small investment and like all couples I guess you should discuss this together. Also this way it guarantees she'll like her ring as well! It shows you care about her opinion and you want to make your future decisions together ! :D

    best of luck with the proposal!

    • ahara on 03/11/2016 - 00:48

      Did something similar. She was happy and afterwards was able to choose exactly what she wanted based on a budget we set together.

      Some girls like to be 'surprised' while others will prefer to chose themselves. That may be the best research you can do and then take it from there.

      So many options in cut to start with, btw.

  • Bonsaichop on 02/11/2016 - 15:26
    +2

    Used BlueNile and it was a fantastic experience. Learnt a lot of about diamonds in the process and bought something that everyone compliments my Fiancée on. She loves it too (well at least that's what she tells me ;) )

    Super fast delivery, was received within 4 days. Also rang and confirmed what I had wanted, the diamond I had chosen was particularly cheap for what it was, was explained that the prices were determined by the wholesale price of the original diamond, so if one was cut and it was of better quality than the rest it still gets priced against the original price of the diamond.

    They also change in AUD so there's no conversion fees.

    • buckster on 02/11/2016 - 16:25
      +1

      Can also vouch for BlueNile - value was better back ~3+ years ago when the dollar as around parity but you certainly get good value. Online you can also specify and pick between multiple different diamonds - gives you an option to know what you're getting vs. just a carat size.

  • curryblender on 02/11/2016 - 15:31
    +3

    Spent $250

    Rest of the money went towards house Mortgage.

  • 0p on 02/11/2016 - 15:54
    +1

    Is shipping free and where exactly from?
    Tell me the city because apparently My address can't receive parcels from Taiwan… :(

    • 0p on 02/11/2016 - 16:00
      +1

      Also how long does it take to ship to tullara regionaL AUstralia?

  • le3lee on 02/11/2016 - 15:54
    +1

    Go to a wholesaler. I have a contact in Sydney who distributes nationwide. PM for details. Someone from OB has bought from him before.

  • matthewli88 on 02/11/2016 - 16:08
    +1

    I bought my engagement ring from James Allen. It was a happy medium between what I saw was three options:

    1) Local Jewellers: the most expensive by far but are also the most convenient. The ability to go and physically inspect the product and speak to somebody in person would have been valuable, but personally these factors did not trump the others.

    2) Online: ultimately the option I chose. It was much, much cheaper than option 1 but I ran the risk of things going wrong without being able to physically inspect the product. James Allen was great though - they have amazing photos online and their live chat system is very helpful. Watch out for conversion and taxes though. Also, Blue Nile is on CashRewards :O

    3) Overseas Jewellers: I looked into this one the least because it was by far the most cumbersome in terms of effort. Some of my friends bought theirs this way though (they are originally from Asia so they combined it with visiting family) and they got really good deals. You'll likely save the most money this way but there are the obvious drawbacks.

    Good luck mate!

  • [Deactivated] on 02/11/2016 - 16:10
    +1

    Had enough money for my car to get a full bare metal body respray in candy apple red.

    Project car still unpainted.

    Now im happily married and been given the luck to purchase my fav muscle car now…. cant wait to find the right one.

  • Make it so on 02/11/2016 - 16:13
    +2

    I doubt any girl wants a second-hand ring.
    I agree not to go to a "generic" jeweller.

    But have you considered a non-generic jeweller?

    I was in the market for an anniversary ring not long ago. I did not like anything I saw in the "generic jeweller" stores, and the fancy jewellers were way too expensive. In the end, I googled around for old-school jewellers who actually make their own jewellery. I went to this traditional jewellery/watchmaker shop (in Perth). I had seen a ring online which I liked, and I asked whether he could do something similar, with some minor tweaks (incl. different precious metal). The quote I got surprised me a lot, not to mention the workmanship. Based on the specs for this ring, I am convinced it would have cost me 2 times as much had it been on display at a normal jeweller.

    So maybe consider what you are after, check online rings for inspiration, and walk into a real jewellery store (not a jewellery big-brand bulk retailer selling the same stuff in 300 stores around the country). At least it won't be a mass-produced product, and you could potentially save a bit of money in the process.

  • ballsofsteel on 02/11/2016 - 16:13
    +7

    Wololo

    • buckster on 02/11/2016 - 16:27
      +5

      Might work in AoE but not sure that'd make up for no ring!

    • The Wololo Wombat on 02/11/2016 - 17:33
      +2

      Haha I was waiting for that!

      OR should I say '11' (now that's an inside joke!)

      • ballsofsteel on 02/11/2016 - 18:50
        +1

        30 30 30 30 30 30

        *Colour changing intensitfies

  • klonky on 02/11/2016 - 16:36
    +1

    Both my partner and I hate the idea of spending lots of money on weddings so I went on a hunt for awhile. In the end I went with this one: http://www.michaelhill.com.au/ring-with-ruby-diamonds-in-10c… I think at the time it was on sale for half price. The wedding band was about the same price.

  • [Deactivated] on 02/11/2016 - 16:37
    +5

    Every dollar spent on a diamond is a dollar too much IMO. It has no inherent value - it's price is entirely determined by diamond holding moguls. It has no real world use (industrial diamonds are synthetic or dirt cheap anyway).

    Having said that, I spent >10k because of expectation and would do it again because of the joy and meaning it brings to my wife.

  • Biance on 02/11/2016 - 16:38
    +4

    A lot of people are moving away from diamonds and I would highly encourage you to get an idea of what your girlfriend is in to.

    My then-boyfriend started asking questions about stones and then ring designs and then eventually he just let me in on the planning process. We spent ages looking online and I ended up becoming obsessed with a particular picture I had saved. A reverse-google image search showed it was actually designed by Solid Gold in Perth (we are in Perth), so we went in to try it on. It was perfect, but $18,000!! Even without the centre diamond it was still $5000.

    My then-boyfriend bought a 7mm aquamarine (what I wanted rather than I diamond) from Ebay for $400 and arranged for Moi Moi to make the same ring (just sent them the picture) for $2,900.

    I was originally convinced I didn't want anything worth over $1,000, but 1.5 years on I am glad he made me get the exact one I wanted (albeit $3,300) and I love it every day. I then got a $100 plain wedding band from Etsy to go with it (rather than the $2,000 matching band Moi Moi suggested) and I love that too.

  • jamiroquai on 02/11/2016 - 16:41
    +4

    Haribo ring

  • Pizdets on 02/11/2016 - 16:48
    +1

    Ring was about $500 bucks and the whole wedding was about $3,000.

  • akastyl13 on 02/11/2016 - 16:52
    +1

    hi mate,

    Been through that process 2 months ago and I am now engaged :)

    Not sure how much you want to spend, but 1 carat is a big deal and out of your league if you want to go for a Round Diamond.
    If you got for a Princess Cut, you might be able to get something around 1 ct. I went for Antique Cushion Cut as it's between round and princess but different brillance.

    Also, if it is a surprise - proposal + ring I would definitely go for a real diamond. It is a one off thing and you want her to appreciate the ring, and cherish it. And also you want her to keep it as long as she can before you have to replace it.

    If she knows about the ring, then maybe you can discuss with her about the fact she does or doesn't want a real diamond.

    For the setting, go for 14K white gold which will be the cheapest you can get. 18K or Platinium are more expensive.

    Few advices:
    1. Do not buy the diamond in Australia, they are very expensive and not good quality
    2. Look for help on Pricescope but do not go too much in the diamond characteristics otherwise you will end up spending so much money.
    3. Look at pre-owned worn or even pre-owned but never worn (yes it happens) - you can save tonnes of money if you get a good deal.

    I have been browsing for about 1 month before I made the decision to buy from the US and I do not regret it.
    I had made comparaison of gsdiamonds (australia) vs US based stores and for the same quality of diamond, I was getting between 20-40% cheaper for the diamond cost from the US, including tax.

    If you happen to buy from the US, you can avoid the 5% Duty by adding a letter to the shipment, but you will have to pay +10% GST.

  • chumlee on 02/11/2016 - 16:52
    +2

    Get a credit card with an interest free period on purchases (eg Coles MasterCard) buy the ring your partner is happy with and pay it off before the period expires. The risk if you go cheap is your wife will want an upgrade in the future.

    Also pay no attention to the value insurance companies place on jewelry. For whatever reason it's always way more than you pay. Probably low risk in terms of claims on jewelry.

  • donkey12 on 02/11/2016 - 16:58
    +2

    I got engaged last year. He is on $135k and I'm on $160k. I wouldn't let him spend big money despite him believing he had to. Much rather spend the money on investments and travel. We compromised and he bought a man made diamond. Rather than spend $10k on a 2ct, he spent $1k on it! No one knows it is a man made one but us. There are stores in most Oz cities. http://www.secrets-shhh.com/products/category/wedding-sets Just organising the wedding and and we are going to do the same thing again. I suppose it depends on your girl and your priorities.

  • ranmalynx on 02/11/2016 - 17:39
    +1

    Don't go for a diamond. Watch this informational video -> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N5kWu1ifBGU

  • Guybrush57 on 02/11/2016 - 17:51
    +1

    I know a guy who had a beautiful ring that would've made any girl blush. Unfortunately he threw it into a volcano.

  • ozeebee on 02/11/2016 - 17:59
    +2

    First of all congrats! I had the exact same question on this site a few years ago now. I received extremely helpful advice then, hopefully I can help you out now too.

    I personally went with www.jamesallen.com to buy the diamond and the ring because no retail store could come near the value I was able to get it for. We went to a jeweller after buying the ring to get it resized because I guessed the incorrect size for my wife. Even the jeweller made a comment on how beautiful and sparkly the diamond was.

    Make sure you read up on the Four C's (http://4cs.gia.edu/EN-US/the-diamond-4-cs.htm), as this will determine the quality of your diamond. TBH the carat is not the most important part when choosing a diamond. You should focus first on the cut and clarity. Followed by carat and colour. The better the cut and clarity the more it will sparkle. You will see some big carat diamond which looks a lot less impressive than smaller better quality ones. To this day my wife prefers to wear her engagement ring on one hand and the wedding ring on another hand, so that the engagement ring can stand out more and she can stare at it.. haha.

    Goodluck on your search, take your time, set your budget and look for that ring.

  • chocoteddy on 02/11/2016 - 18:06
    +4

    Advice from my mum when I asked her a looooong time ago.

    Mom: Dad sat down with me over dinner date one day, and casually brought up the topic of registering for marriage.
    Me: No flowers? No getting down on one knee?
    Mom: No he kinda just brought it up.
    Me: What about the ring?
    Mom: He took me to the jewellers one day and we both chose our rings together.
    Me: He should have surprised you with the one-knee thing and chose a ring himself :3
    Mom: No, if its a ring I'm wearing for the rest of my life, I want to choose it.
    Me: But then the proposal just gets boring.
    Mom: You're going to spend the rest of your life making decisions together; it's a place to start.

    There you go. Tell her you want to marry her; and tell her you want only whats best for her which she can perfectly decide for herself.
    idk if it matters, but I'm girl and I perfectly agree with mom.

  • Plug on 02/11/2016 - 18:07
    +1

    I spent GBP£300 back in 1989.

  • banana365 on 02/11/2016 - 18:12
    +2

    Don't spend too much, like I did (or rather she did, I just opened the wallet wiiiiiiiide). Get something you both like that's not too flashy and you can see her wearing for the rest of her life without being worried about damaging or losing it. We ended up designing a solitaire with a robust but elegant setting (I'm an engineer, I'll be damned if I'm spending that much for the bloody thing to fall out due to shitty design). We've got a fairly active outdoor lifestyle (mountain bikes, climbing etc.) and my wife was so worried about the ring that she took it off so often and we now just have it in a drawer somewhere. I know a few people who have lost either their entire ring or a major part of the setting whilst gardening. Flash might be the name of the game to show off to her friends, but in a few years time that'll be irrelevant.

  • mbck on 02/11/2016 - 18:26
    +6

    Hi @DCO90,

    In terms of how much, it really depends. It's such a personal thing. Someone would say that's crazy to spend so and so, while others want to spend up big.

    I think you know her best. Has she given any hints as to which type of ring, or from a specific store? Does she prefer a bigger size or more of a quality kind of girl? Does she care about 'branding'? I know some girls want specifically a ring from so and so. I can't answer these for you (obviously).

    However I can give you some advice on what to look for in a diamond. I've done a CRAP load of research when I was buying the other half her ring. Like I've wasted too much time on this.

    Here goes.

    Always choose those with the proper documentation; by that I mean via GIA or AGS. This is quite strict for me and I'll tell you why a little down later. In regards to the 4 C's; the most important is the CUT. COLOUR comes next. CLARITY and CARAT is interchangeable depending on personal preference.

    CUT is important because, no matter how high your COLOUR/CLARITY/CARAT is, if the cut is not EXCELLENT, it won't look like a diamond. It will look dull. No brilliance, no shine, no blink. CUT is super important.

    COLOUR is also important. COLOUR is organised in 3. D,E,F. This is almost pure white. G,H,I has a very very slight tint of yellow (EXTREMELY SLIGHT). J,K,L has a bit more yellowish tint. I wouldn't go below this to be honest. The best values, are F and G. Actually, G is the best value. It's almost pure white and has the least amount of yellow tint. But because it's not at the 'pure white' level, you're not paying through the roof! Best of both worlds.

    CLARITY is important (somewhat). You have FL and IFL = Flawless and Internally Flawless. Don't bother, these are super expensive and does not present good value. VVS1, VVS2 (Very very slightly included) basically means there are imperfections, but you need a 10* magnification loupe to see them. Plus they are very very extremely small, usually only a trained eye can see. VS1, VS2, there are more imperfections and some of them are larger, but again, you will need a 10* mag loupe to see. SI1, SI2 (Slightly included), the inclusions/imperfections are more observeable with the 10* (actually quite observable). I1, I2, I3, these has inclusions that are visible to the naked eye. Don't get these! The best value would be SI1. Yes there are imperfections, BUT you can't see them with the naked eye. ONLY via a 10* loupe. PLUS, when you are cleaning these, you can use those imperfections as a 'fingerprint'; that way dodgy jewelers can't swap and change your diamond!

    CARAT is important for certain girls. Some girls just want a big diamond, then you'll have to choose a bigger one. The sweet spot for these are just below 1 carat. The price for diamonds jump when it's 1 carat vs 0.99 carat because of that word "1Carat". 0.95 Carat doesn't sound sexy apparently. But hey if you can get anything around that region, you're a winner.

    So the next question would be, how do you know the diamond has a certain specification? The ones i've suggested: Excellent CUT, G COLOUR, SI1, 0.95 CARAT. How would you know that you really are paying for these? Well that's why you get a GIA or AGS certified diamond. They are extremely strict on the conditions. If a diamond is borderline between two specification, they will choose the lower one.

    DO NOT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD BUY TIFFANY AND CO. They have their own in-house certification. They don't look at the diamond until after it is in the settings. Note the classic Tiffany and CO has 6 PRONGS (the thing that hold the diamond together). This allows the jeweler to set the diamond such that any blemishes are hidden by these prongs. They then certify the diamond AFTER it's been set. NO BULLSH*T here.

    Fake diamonds/mossanite, I'm not a huge fan of. Partly because if you want to reset the ring size, you can't because they're brittle with heat.

    I've got things to say about platinum/paladium/gold/silver ring settings but I'll leave you all alone for now XD

    Hope that helped someone!

    • mbck on 02/11/2016 - 18:37
      +1

      Ps, I would not buy from local jewellers. We got our wedding band from James Allen. It was either that or Blue Nile. We had an issue with sizing (our fault), but it was a painless process getting the correct size (frustrating coz it happened, but not going through 100 hoops!).

    • The Wololo Wombat on 02/11/2016 - 20:42

      Huge help mate! Thanks for spelling all of that out clearly! I will refer back to this when choosing a stone :) PS, what are your thoughts on the metal? I was thinking Platinum?

      • mbck on 02/11/2016 - 21:46
        +2

        No Problem! I personally would go with platinum, thats what we've got. It's much denser than palladium. This means it feels heavier and I link that with quality (that's how you can differentiate the two, weight). In saying that, both platinum and palladium, when scratched, does not lose metal. They're simply, pushed away.

        Gold, on the other hand if scratched will result in some of the metal taken away. Over time you 'lose' your gold. If you want to shine a gold ring, you'll also lose some metal. Hence don't shine your ring too many times.

        Other metals also requires you to do annual rhodium plating. This protects the metal to a certain extent. It wears off over time. Not too sure how much it is, but that's another chore I cbf about.

        Palladium looks like platinum though, so for the characteristic and price, it's a good metal to choose.

        I also find platinum/Palladium to be more of a classic look. Rose gold feels like it's a seasonal trend. (Just imo!)

        You also have to consider what your partner like.

    • activ8newbs on 13/09/2020 - 17:49

      Wow, can't upvote this because greater than 30 days but as someone who's going through this daunting process atm, THANKYOU! You have no idea how much this has helped me.

      I have no idea who you are, but your way of writing, coupled with your clarity has instilled so much confidence for me, into your research.

      Thankyou so much!!! This is truly invaluable, and relevant advice for me!

  • GourmetFoodie on 02/11/2016 - 18:28
    +2

    Offering a female perspective here…The most important thing I can suggest is that you take her to a few quality stores (Tiffany, Charles Rose, Hardy Brothers etc) to try things on and get a sense of what she likes. Make sure you take photos of what she likes and note the prices. The reason it is so important to try it on is that she may think she likes a particular style but on the hand it can look very different. Also are you 100% sure she wants a diamond. Not all women do. Also 1.5ct diamond is not as big as you think….for some women "big" is important but it may then mean she needs to sacrifice on stone type or quality so make sure she tries different grades and stone types.

    Once you have a sense of style, colour and stone size in an ideal world, I would find a private jeweler you can trust through your personal network and get it custom designed and made. My husband did this and from what he told me, the process was so personalized - they spent 6 months alone just sourcing the stone.

    If you prefer the ease of a retail store (and let's face it, putting your trust in a one-man private jeweler you don't know can be hard), Tiffany, Charles Rose, Hardy Brothers ect will give you a quality item but yes, you will pay the retail markup. However you also get the guarantees behind the brand and some women want a Tiffany ring no matter what.

    Plenty of people buy online too but have heard mixed reports on BlueNile so do your research - PriceScope is a great forum for info…but I think it's too stressful for such a significant purchase - you want the personal touch.

    Whatever you do, avoid the shopping center jewlers like Prouds….they are scum.

    Lastly, I think spend what you can afford. Don't go into debt for it no matter what. Any of those rules like 3 months salary ect are BS. If I was on your income I would spend 8-10k absolute max if I was going to go "all out". Remember, average wedding costs 30k and house prices are insane. You can always upgrade her ring later.

    • iamw0man on 03/11/2016 - 09:50

      Yes, you make a great first point. Most rings look great online or in a store window but you don't really know what you want until you wear it. My thoughts on what I was looking for changed entirely after trying a few on.

  • chumlee on 02/11/2016 - 18:53
    +2

    I proposed to my now wife with a $20 ring from Bevilles as I knew she would want to pick her own ring. Went to a jewelry store she likes and just like George Costanza with the wedding invitations, I started at one end of the store (cheap end) and my wife of course started at the other end. Lucky she slowly made her towards my side and both happy with the choice and price

  • Saga on 02/11/2016 - 19:03
    +2

    I did option three and bought from a Melbourne auction house (Leonard Joel, I think). Ended up with a designer engagement ring and wedding band for about 2.5k that came with a valuation report for 9k. We're both big into reusing and recycling so there wasn't any issues with it not being new and neither of us are superstitious The trickiest part was getting the size right but I borrowed one of her rings a few months earlier and got a jeweller to tell me what size it was. It could have been resized but luckily everything fitted.

  • iSamurai on 02/11/2016 - 19:08
    +2

    Side question - your initials don't happen to be SM right? I've got a mate, also 26 in Brisbane who's a teacher about to get married!

    • The Wololo Wombat on 02/11/2016 - 20:25
      +1

      Haha nope! That's cool though :)

      • The Wololo Wombat on 02/11/2016 - 20:49
        +3

        Wait, something's fishy… is this a trap? Are you a girl, trying to find out if you boyfriend is about to propose? :O haha

        • iSamurai on 02/11/2016 - 21:07
          +2

          LOL definitely not! I'm also a guy and 26 as well (except I'm single haha)! I wish you and your other half all the best. I thought I was about to find friends who are also on OzBargain (only three close friends know I browse this site).

  • prinsenhof on 02/11/2016 - 19:24
    +5

    I bought a super cheap ring for the engagement. I surprised her on Gokyo Ri overlooking mount everest and the ranges. I just told her afterwards its a shit ring and i want her to choose one.

    We bought both ours from bluenile. You have to pay import tax of course and a processing fee, but its still cheaper.
    Hers cost $2500, my wedding ring cost $1000. Our wedding cost $1800 including the registration and a dinner.

    We then quit our jobs and went overseas for a year as the honeymoon (that cost about $40000 not including lost wages).

    • The Wololo Wombat on 02/11/2016 - 20:47

      Haha bloody brilliant mate! 1 year honeymoon for the win!

  • [Deactivated] on 02/11/2016 - 19:33
    +1

    First piece advice, don't go to any chain jewellers. For example Michael Hill diamonds are junk and have junk certificates.

    Find out if you need a diamond. If she's out to impress others a synthetic one will do. If she REALLY wants one, then consider it as an entertainment expense (e.g. going out to the movies, blowing $50 on tickets and popcorn etc.) but a long term one :)

    Blue Nile is the lower end of online Jewellers, use the pricescope forum to get a better deal (e.g. James Allen, Brian Gavin, Whiteflash etc.). 3 smaller diamonds are cheaper than 1 big one AND you get more diamond, but she might not like the style.

    And while Tiffany usually gets pretty nice stones, they sure charge you for it (and also certify their own diamonds instead of AGS/GIA certified. And don't believe the no blood diamond crap, it's not that hard for blood diamonds to get forged/bought certificates anyway so only get a Tiffany if she REALLY wants it, but you'll get a lot less stone. Don't hang up too much on it though, that's her choice. You are pretty much buying happiness regardless of size :)

  • moza on 02/11/2016 - 19:58
    +1

    I went through diamondexchange.com for the diamond and then bluenile.com for the ring to be made around it. Was very, very happy with the online purchasing. Spent about 2.5k but I reckon I got over 5k value if I'd purchased from jeweller.

    I had an issue with my platinum man-wedding-ring, where it was too big, and I needed a resize, but had issues with postage insurance for a ring… So try and get it correct size. It's a pain to resize platinum as well in Australia… Takes a higher heater than most jewellers have… Or something like that.

  • decr on 02/11/2016 - 20:05
    +1

    Don't have time to wade through all the comments, but keep in mind if things escalate there's another ring coming so splurge on that instead. Antique shops can have great buys and most decent ones seem to come with a certificate of authenticity.

    What I did was got one off one of them, it was vintage which she liked, and had 2 custom made gold/diamond rings made to fit the engagement ring as the wedding ring. The engagement ring was around $300, very pretty though, all up around 4k. And no, I'm not coming from money so that was a big investment.

    Might not be her cup of tea but that was my experience. All the best!

  • BargainCowboy on 02/11/2016 - 20:17
    +2

    You need to add to the survey "No engagement ring was given"…

    • Lunatic on 02/11/2016 - 20:32
      +4

      I want there to be a "Forever Alone :(" Option as well

  • euk on 02/11/2016 - 20:24
    +2

    Just got engaged last weekend :)

    My advice: get it custom made. Getting the diamond separate from the setting saves you a lot of money, as the markup is mainly around those who have preset diamonds.
    I personally used GS diamonds, who had a shitload of diamonds on their database that was very competitively priced. It's around the same price as Blue Nile, based in Sydney, and when comparing to others with similar GIA specc'd diamonds, was around 30-40% cheaper for the diamond alone.

    In regards to the setting, I went with platinum. The advantages are that it is less likely to fracture than gold, has a natural silver shine to it so that it doesn't need to be rhodium plated every so often. The disadvantage is that it is more prone to 'bending' rather than 'cracking' like gold, but this has the added advantage you're not likely to lose a diamond from a loose setting you don't realise.

    When getting the ring made, try get an idea with your partner what they like. Be sneaky about it! I had to ask her many questions that didn't seem that related to get an idea of what she didn't like. From there you can work towards finding a suitable design, or if you can't find one, go get a custom made ring to your specifications. It'll take longer to custom make a ring from a base design.

    For those curious, I paid just over 13k for a GIA cert. 1.54 carat diamond TripleEx on a platinum pave setting. Of course, you don't need to get this, but that price was from an Australian company, which tbh for just under 2 carats of high quality diamond is very competitive. It looks simply amazing to me at least. You don't need to necessarily shop outside Aus to get good value.

    The most important part was she said yes!

    • The Wololo Wombat on 02/11/2016 - 20:55

      Congratulations mate! Stoked for you :)

      13k for that rings sounds like a great price! I'm looking at getting a similar setting too.

      I will check out GS diamonds, as you are the second person to recommend them to me!

      • euk on 02/11/2016 - 22:15
        +1

        Here's a pic of it for your reference

        https://www.dropbox.com/s/dpyvgjvxu9cebwm/20161030_123843.jp…

        Really high quality craftsmanship, they followed up all my emails, and with some pushing I was able to get them to make it all in the space of just 3 weeks!
        Even the engraving was high quality cursive. Have nothing but good words to say about them

        • The Wololo Wombat on 02/11/2016 - 22:29

          That does look good :) Thanks for sharing, it's good to be able to see it for a proper comparison

  • FittyFitty on 02/11/2016 - 20:50
    +2

    Have you considered deceased estate auctions? Some cracker bargains to be had on jewellery…

  • Tigi on 02/11/2016 - 21:00
    +1

    In my opinion, the type/style of ring that she likes matter so much more than the price range.

    If you're not planning on surprising her, picking one together would be nice.

    If you are planning for a surprise, please ask her best fried (rather than assume). Her bestie would certainly know what she wants. Make sure you ask these specific questions:

    a) Platinum or white gold or rose gold or yellow gold
    b) Diamond or coloured stone (the latter popularised by the royal wedding)
    c) Is she a Tiffany girl? If so, go for if it's within your budget (brand trumps rationale choice if she has a strong preference)
    d) If diamond: everything else equal would she prefer Carat over the other Cs?
    e) Before you ask any of these your first question to the bestie should be "do you know what type of engagement ring she wants?" (don't drop hints, just be straight up). Her answer for what your gf would like as a normal ring might be different to an engagement ring
    f) It would be a good idea to validate the answer with her other best friend/mum/rellos

    Please make sure you get the style that she likes, it will be for life after all. Good luck, all the best!

  • [Deactivated] on 02/11/2016 - 21:03
    +8

    100k income
    1k (euro) ring bought in Germany. Much better quality

    Things to bear in mind
    1. Girls are not rational
    My Mrs is not materialistic but unfortunately her friends often are. This can be awkward. Depends how many Fs you give
    2. No diamond is worth what they tell you
    3. A diamond is a useless depreciating asset
    4. Expensive diamonds need to be insured, adding to the cost
    5. White gold needs to be replated every few years
    6. If she wants you to irresponsibly spend 1/3 of your income on a rock, or worse take debt, is she really a keeper?
    7. Depending on her job and other reasons, not everyone wears their engagement ring all the time especially after getting the wedding ring
    8. Don't surprise her. Make sure she's happy with whatever you both decide. Surprise her with something else

    Good luck
    At the end of the day, a ring is a ring. You can always trade up in a few years. And don't forget the equivalent "engagement watch"

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