Ask for Your Opinion When in This Situation Teaching Your Kids

codinghelloworld on 28/05/2018 - 14:05
Last edited 28/05/2018 - 14:24 by 1 other user

Hi everyone,

Yesterday went to supermarket to buy stuff, but involve into this situation.

My kid has the bad habit that biting his finger nail. I reminded him a lot of times at that times but he seemed did not hear me, or listen to his father. Then I flapped on his hand to stop it.
Then about 3-4 second later I was hit by a ball threw by another kid to my head, the age is similar to my kid (6 years old), he approached me and stared at me and said "you should not hit your kid, you are deserve to be hit by this ball". Then the kid walked away but continue stare at me.

I was totally speechless. In my opinion, as a parent we do everything we can to make our kid better, in this case to prevent him bite his finger nail, he is old enough that to know this behaviour is bad. But about the other kid, what I see is he try to put his point of view to change my point of view. His point of view is to let kid do whatever they want and he can involve to other problem and make it aggressively. I saw many kids yelling or kick at their parents, but I never put my point of view to change them, or force them (like throwing a ball to an adult's head)

So if you are parents, what should you do? Thanks

Toys & Kids

closed Comments

  • dasher86 on 28/05/2018 - 14:08
    +18

    throw the ball back.

    • codinghelloworld on 28/05/2018 - 14:14
      +1

      then I would be aggressive like him. Funny thing is his parent did not do something when kid acted thing like that.

      • Scrooge McDuck on 28/05/2018 - 22:28

        I'm surprised a 6 year old had such good aim (albeit poor grammar)! He might have promise as a future Australian cricketer.

        • lambsie on 28/05/2018 - 23:14
          +1

          I wonder if he was also carrying sandpaper?

    • try2bhelpful on 28/05/2018 - 16:32
      +3

      I would've held onto the ball, and when the parents asked for it back I would've pointed out the kid threw it at you and you want him to apologise for it before he gets it back. My reaction to the kid would be to tell him to "F… off"
      BTW - You will absolutely not cure your kid of chewing her nails by this method. She will just chew them when you aren't there. You need to work out why she is chewing her nails and see if you can fix that issue. Best of luck though I'm in my 50s and I still chew my nails.

      • Scrooge McDuck on 28/05/2018 - 22:34

        Dip your fingers in Vegemite.

        You're welcome.

        • airal3rt on 28/05/2018 - 22:57

          I don't bite my fingernails, but if they tasted like Vegemite I'd probably start.

        • Scrooge McDuck on 28/05/2018 - 23:17
          +1

          @airal3rt:

          Why would you want to put something dirty in your mouth?

          And biting your nails is equally unhygienic.

  • Gronk on 28/05/2018 - 14:22
    +1

    Tip water on his head.

    • codinghelloworld on 28/05/2018 - 14:32

      This remind me about a youtube video who smash his trolley to other people's foot and then the victim pour milk on his head.

      • Scrooge McDuck on 28/05/2018 - 23:11

        Place a can of tuna (Isle #4) into a sock (Isle #8) and meet the kid near the tomato sauce (Isle #5) so it looks like an accident.

        • mafmouf on 29/05/2018 - 05:50

          Aisle?

  • onetwothreefour on 28/05/2018 - 14:23

    Throw a tantrum.

    • codinghelloworld on 28/05/2018 - 14:33

      Don't want to put it on high level. What I want to know is how parents react in this situation.

      • Scrooge McDuck on 28/05/2018 - 23:44

        Tell the kid he's adopted, you're his real father, you got rid of him because he's too naughty, the pair he thinks are his Mum and Dad don't really love him, and they have lots of fun while he's asleep.

        When he discovers the veracity of the last bit, the seeds of doubt will germinate and eke away at his self-esteem.

  • [Deactivated] on 28/05/2018 - 14:28
    +3

    I think the smacking cycle wouldn't work anyway and just drives the behaviour underground. I'd try bribing them with a videogame or something. Carrot approach rather than stick.

    Forget about the kid who threw the ball, as society is geared to protect the small. At least you have a funny story out of it.

    • codinghelloworld on 28/05/2018 - 14:36
      +1

      That's what I do. When my kid saw the other kid did that to me, I remind him this is bad bahaviour and if he applies this point of view in home, he never get new toy and times for playing games.

      • [Deactivated] on 28/05/2018 - 14:42
        +2

        Get him a fidget spinner? Scooters need both hands, so maybe try to spend some time on activities that need concentration and both hands.

  • bobbified on 28/05/2018 - 14:43
    +4

    Pick up the other kid and hook the back of his shirt onto a rack so that it looks like he's trying to swim in mid-air but can't get down! lol!

    (Please don't do that - it only looks funny in movies!)

    • codinghelloworld on 28/05/2018 - 14:49
      +2

      Haha, you have a good sense of humor.

  • myusername on 28/05/2018 - 14:44
    +3

    oxygen deprivation

  • Savas on 28/05/2018 - 14:45

    You should've called the cops

    • codinghelloworld on 28/05/2018 - 14:50
      +1

      I reckon cops will protect both kids and kick both parents to jail, since this is fail of education :D

  • Adz81 on 28/05/2018 - 14:49
    +5

    Just peg the ball back at the little shitbag.

    When you connect and he goes crying to the mother that sharted him into the world, just shake your head sadly and mutter, "Isn't it terrible when you realise your own son is a liar?"

    Failing that, antagonise said birthgiver until she attacks you, then sue them for everything, and I mean everything. Take their (profanity) house, leave them on the streets, because let's face it, why halfass retaliation? Go for permanent, lasting damage.

    • jelko on 28/05/2018 - 14:54
      +1

      I like your thinking

    • codinghelloworld on 28/05/2018 - 15:10

      It seems you put that too high, but I like this.

    • Homr on 28/05/2018 - 15:55

      ROFLMAO

  • [Deactivated] on 28/05/2018 - 14:51
    +5

    throw the ball at the parent of the other kid because he shouldn't let his little shit behave like that

  • Quantumcat on 28/05/2018 - 14:55
    +4

    He bites his fingernails because he is bored or stressed. Either eliminate the cause (help him solve his boredom or the thing causing him stress), or give him another outlet - like someone suggested a fidget spinner.

    As for the bad kid - what you said about reminding him that behaviour like that won't fly at home should be fine. You can't really enact vengeance on someone else's child.

    • Adz81 on 28/05/2018 - 15:06
      +3

      Of course you can.
      Hell, it's practically a community service if you do, the little rodent's birthgivers aren't disciplining it, so it falls upon society to do it.

      Remember folks, hit 'em with a bag of Valencia oranges… They won't leave a bruise, but it'll show them who's boss.

      • [Deactivated] on 28/05/2018 - 15:14

        Do navels do the trick?

      • codinghelloworld on 28/05/2018 - 15:19
        +2

        I prefer Durian, might work in one hit. :D

        • [Deactivated] on 28/05/2018 - 17:12

          Too seasonal. Can't hit anyone during the rainy season.

  • jar-unit on 28/05/2018 - 15:09
    +1

    Bash him

  • chumlee on 28/05/2018 - 15:12
    +9

    Tell staff at the supermarket you saw the kid stuff items down his pants.

  • hogwarts on 28/05/2018 - 15:12
    +1

    Sounds like something out of a show? Just me? OK.

    • codinghelloworld on 28/05/2018 - 15:15

      Cannot get what you mean, sir?

      • BanannaMan on 29/05/2018 - 00:03

        He's saying, sounds like a comedy skit

  • [Deactivated] on 28/05/2018 - 15:13
    +2

    I'd yell at the kid and the parents.

    That's completely bullshit behaviour by the kid, and negligent parenting by the useless parents.

  • pformag on 28/05/2018 - 15:17
    +1

    Do the pinch on the back of the arm, workers rather well, and inconspicuous. (for your own kid, instead of the smack on the hand)

    Have you tried the stuff that tastes disgusting for the nail-biting? Also, maybe something is bothering your child that is causing them to nail bite.

    I am a nail biter, and I do it during high levels of stress. Maybe something to think about.

  • Nugs on 28/05/2018 - 15:24

    keep/hide the ball

  • Fier2 on 28/05/2018 - 15:31
    -1

    First, that other kid shouldn t throw a ball at you and definetly not to your head. Even if it s for making a point. That is NOT ACCEPTABLE! I would have caught that kid, stand in front of the parents and ask them how did they raised their kids?! When my daughter want to make a point with me or someone else, she would just talk. And this is how i raised her.
    Second, if your kids like to bite his nails. There are basically nothing you can do. As it can be his way to say he s nervous. Of course, you shouldn t have hit his hand. But i can understand how frustrating it is. I remembered i stop doing it after one of my teacher show me some really disgusting pictures with necrosis at the end of the fingers.Some other parents will dip the kids fingers into a bitter solution (available at the pharmacy) to make them being disgust by the taste.

    • codinghelloworld on 28/05/2018 - 15:53
      -1

      Thank you for your suggestion, I will let him see those pictures. Actually I already put his fingers to olive oil, he stopped doing for a few days but it come back again. A picture worth thousand words.

    • codinghelloworld on 28/05/2018 - 15:54
      -1

      I regret that in that moment I was freezed by his bad bahaviour, never seen a kid like this, so I did not do anything rather than remind my kid.

  • Rhubarb Jones on 28/05/2018 - 15:32
    +10

    That little kid completely owned you. You should submissively sulk off and post about it on an online forum.

  • spackbace on 28/05/2018 - 15:40

    Good aim for a 6yo, get that boy a baseball scholarship!

    Don't get too hung up on the nail biting. There's worse things you could hit his hand for.

    • codinghelloworld on 28/05/2018 - 15:48

      He opened fire at 2 metre away from me :)
      Agree with you, there are tons of worse things to hit his hand.

  • pao2x on 28/05/2018 - 15:58
    +1

    I would have put his ball on a hard to reach shelf

  • Illian on 28/05/2018 - 16:04
    +2

    That won't help with the nail biting, you'll never know if he's doing it while alone, the habit needs to break, you can buy nail 'polish' from pharmacists which tastes so nasty they won't want to bite them, keep applying it for a few months and they'll never want to again.

    • try2bhelpful on 28/05/2018 - 16:34

      Until you stop putting on the polish and then they will do it again.

    • Beanvee on 28/05/2018 - 16:37
      +2

      As a nail biter I can tell you that stuff doesn't work, when I was a kid it was probably 3 attempts max before I got used to the taste and pushed through

  • Homr on 28/05/2018 - 16:04

    lol there are some really funny people here on OzBargain

  • tre180 on 28/05/2018 - 16:25
    +12

    You should of knelt down, look the kid dead in the eyes and said:
    What the f%&k did you just f*****g throw at me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire Aus armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the f%$k out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my f$%king words. You think you can get away with throwing that ball at me in the supermarket? Think again, f$%ker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across Australia and your primary school is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're f%&king dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the Australian Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little sh!t. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your f$%king tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're f$%king dead, kiddo.

    • brazen00 on 28/05/2018 - 17:01
      +2

      Nah, too subtle.

    • codinghelloworld on 28/05/2018 - 17:11

      I worry when I am talking like that his reinforcement troops arrive. :D

    • try2bhelpful on 28/05/2018 - 17:37
      -2

      Getting 'nam flashbacks, are we?

    • JungliChilli on 29/05/2018 - 06:07

      Noted this down for whatever I become a parent.

  • Beanvee on 28/05/2018 - 16:42
    +3

    If there's a root cause like stress I'd work on trying to figure that out.
    But personally I've bit my nails as long as I can remember, and I couldn't tell you what compels me to. Never felt stressed or anxious much as a kid. I just don't like seeing my nails beyond the length I can bite them to, and nothing my parents tried work. Smacking my hand away, the bad tasting stuff, bribes, etc all failed.

    • try2bhelpful on 28/05/2018 - 17:37

      Absolutely, when the kid wants to stop, they will.

  • garetz on 28/05/2018 - 16:43

    I would of kept the ball and said thank you for your gift and insightful wisdom.

  • doweyy on 28/05/2018 - 17:12
    +2

    You should've told the kid that santa isn't real, that'd serve him right.

    • Scrooge McDuck on 28/05/2018 - 23:30

      I tried this with adults and Jesus, didn't work.

  • Ughhh on 28/05/2018 - 17:46
    +1

    Regarding nail biting, I used to have this bad habit too when I was a kid, up until high teens. I didn't realise I was biting until my mother told me each time. It wasn't until I started using nail polish that I became more aware of when I put a finger on my lips. With nail polish, it's very hard to bite and it feels different.

    Dunno whether your son is doing it unknowingly like me, or… Just hungry lol. If the former, clear nail polish could work, as long as he doesn't continue after being aware.

  • infinite on 28/05/2018 - 21:01

    You should have roshambo'd the little princess.

  • Punda on 28/05/2018 - 21:03
    +1

    I used to bite my nails till my aunt bribed me with money for every nail she could see over the top of the palms of my hands. You could try that as an incentive

  • MessyG on 28/05/2018 - 21:03
    +3

    If it were me I would have just laughed and said 'aye aye captain' and walked off. He's 6. Let it go.

    • codinghelloworld on 28/05/2018 - 22:33

      Haha, yeah. At the end I think his parent will pay hard price for this education.

      • Scrooge McDuck on 28/05/2018 - 22:58

        And so may the local community and taxpayers as a whole.

        The other kid is already out of line. Submitting to his authority sends the wrong message.

        I would've retained the ball and confronted his minder if the situation escalated.

  • Davo1111 on 28/05/2018 - 21:12

    umm face kick, obviously.

  • DiscoJango on 28/05/2018 - 21:21

    wait till kid goes into next aisle, sneak around, lob 250gram sirena tuna in chilli oil can at his head, run away back to next aisle. proceed to shop calmly.

  • Yummy on 28/05/2018 - 22:21

    Destroy his ball/s.

  • tabz on 28/05/2018 - 22:28

    Crop dust

  • ahly92 on 28/05/2018 - 22:55

    "Release the hounds"

  • Herbse on 28/05/2018 - 23:19
    +1

    My girl bites her nails, we don't care because it saves us having to cut them.. strange thing is that I've never actually seen her do it, but she does because they're always short and bitten off..
    I know scolding her won't work, at a certain age, fear of scolding or hitting is only temporary and doesn't solve the problem. It's a habit that needs to be forgotten, either bitter nail polish or just let them do it.

    It's a funny situation you created with the boy throwing a ball at you because you hit your kid.
    You used violence to stop something bad, and so did he. So you really can't be mad at him.

  • raj koothrappali on 28/05/2018 - 23:32
    +1

    Grab a trolley first.
    Keep the ball.
    Smack your kid again.
    You get hit by another ball.
    Keep the ball.
    Rinse and repeat.

    Sell it on ebay.
    Make a motza.
    You are welcome.

    • codinghelloworld on 29/05/2018 - 05:56

      I think the shipping fee will cost more than the profit, sir :-p

  • HumbleCat on 29/05/2018 - 02:22

    'I would praise the second child. He saw an adult hitting a small kid and did something to stop it. To him, it didnt matter at the time what the reason was, just that you were striking your kid. It is possibly your child may have a unhappy look on his face which the other kid saw.

    Just shows he had a strong moral compass to act, sure there may have been a better way to go about it but he did something. He even had the gall to tell you to stop hitting your child. I see a bright future for him. I would've bought him something as a reward and if he told me that, as his parent I would cheer him for stopping someone doing a bad thing.

    Personally I would even teach him if he sees something like this happening, he can even say in a loud voice, why is that woman hitting her child!'

    As for you, in your position I would instead think why did that kid did that and tell me to stop. He saw another person like him being hurt and tried to do the right thing (in his own way). If you can't get that around your head, I'm sorry there's nothing further I can do for you.

    • codinghelloworld on 29/05/2018 - 05:55

      I would more than happy to hear his voice first rather than the ball first. Opening aggressive without knowing the context is another problem.

  • kururii on 29/05/2018 - 03:38

    Nontoxic, bitter nail polish exists.

  • BestofOZB on 29/05/2018 - 05:13
    +1

    I smack my kids anywhere anytime I feel it is appropriate (don't over-do it).

    I would have firmly told the ball kid not to do it again and moved on, it is up to his parents to discipline him.

    I tell my children all the good values during bedtime stories (a nice princess once stopped biting her nails and she grew quicker/more beautiful etc). Works well for me.

    If you come from a different cultural background, raising kids is different between cultures, don't stick to your background culture or completely adopt the Australian way, take the best of each.

  • dogboy on 29/05/2018 - 05:17

    Bikies

  • Moderatorscotty on 29/05/2018 - 06:37

    Thread closes due to inappropriate / unhelpful comments.

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