Am I The Asshole for Asking Somebody Else in My Apartment Block Not to Get in The Elevator with Me?

On my way out of my apartment block this evening, the lift stopped on the floor below me where there was another resident waiting.

My girlfriend and I asked this person if they would be okay to wait for us to send the lift back up (5 floors, probably 40 seconds wait in total).

The person tried to barge into the lift saying "for god's sake are you serious?" before changing their mind, telling us to "B*****r off" and then they took the stairs.

Is this a reasonable request on my part? Would you do the same in this situation? I'm not a hypochondriac but I have been pretty careful in keeping my distance and reducing the risk. It'd be daft to then enter a confined space with someone.

Context - lift is approx 1.5m x 1.5m, space enough for about 4 people pre social distancing.

Poll Options

  • 72
    Unreasonable Request, Let Them In
  • 6
    Let Them In But Go Back To Back
  • 298
    Fair Request, Ask Them Politely To Wait
  • 841
    You Should Get Out, Let Them Go Down and Ask They Send It Back Up

Comments

        • +1

          The trouble is, that if they wait for the next pass, will that have someone in it? How about the next? How many times must it go past before they get a clear elevator?

          • +3

            @dizzle: Just take the stairs tbh, better for everyone. Leave the elevator for people who need it.

  • +7

    I actually don't know, interesting to see the votes here. In my block theres a sign up saying only 1 person in the elevator at a time, apparently due to new covid rules of #people in an area, so I actually do wonder if theres a proper rule about it right now.
    Personally I probably wouldn't mind, but I'd face the other direction. Then again the elevator in my apartment block takes ages, so if yours were faster it might be different.

    • +3

      Username checks out

    • +1

      If there's a mutual agreement between occupants or through a special meeting, sure.

      If not, it is not up to the individual to implement and enforce their own rules.

      • +8

        But does the government enforced social distancing law not supersede all of these? There would be 3 people (does this count as a social gathering of multiple households?) in closer proximity than 1.5m

        • +3

          I'm not sure about the social habits of others but I have never considered being in a lift as a social gathering.

    • +1

      Our workplace has these up over the place. "This meeting room/office can hold x many people".

      If you were serious you could put in a complaint and I reckon you'd see a sign put up pretty quickly. They won't take the risk of getting inspected/fined.

      Sure that person will immediately suspect you for being the "party pooper" but I think that's the sort of person who has a bad attitude anyway. There is a difference between "not agreeing and understanding" and not agreeing and being an ass about it.

  • +8

    What if it were a cute single girl, would you break your own policy and ride with them?

    • +5

      Yep worth risking

    • +3

      Haha. No exceptions for me, it's a very small lift.

      • +8

        Lol..I’m sure if your gf wasn’t there

      • +3

        it's a very small lift.

        Even better then :)

        • Nice

    • COVID-19 > Celibacy

    • -1

      Define "cute" ?

    • How would you know they're single?

      Crappers, got it.

  • +1

    AITA?

    Yes.

    • +1

      Overwhelmingly it would appear.

  • +20

    It is a reasonable request.
    If you are in the elevator first and then they are arguably breaking social distancing rules by coming closer into your space in the lift.
    They should wait and take the next lift.

    • +5

      This was our mindset. Had they come down in the lift to our floor we would have told them to go on and ask if they'd send it back up for us.

      Lift etiquette seems a touchy subject

    • I agree. What if you had coronavirus?

  • +6

    I live in a ‘hotspot’ I won’t get in the lift with anyone, no exceptions. I’d rather take the stairs if need be. You really can’t be too careful.

    • I live in a ‘hotspot’ I won’t get in the lift with anyone, no exceptions.

      There's a difference between choosing not to get in a lift with someone and trying to stop someone else from taking the lift. If you don't want to take the lift with someone else, that's fine, you can get out of the lift and wait for an empty lift. Of course, that's a perfectly reasonable thing to do.

      • +2

        If I were in the lift and it stopped for someone else to get in I would ask them not to get in as OP has done. They have the choice to say no and if they did get in, I would get out and take the stairs. I have a newborn baby to take care of I will not risk getting sick with anything not just Covid19. If anyone thinks that’s rude then so be it but they aren’t the ones that have to take care of my young family.

        • -2

          If I were in the lift and it stopped for someone else to get in I would ask them not to get in as OP has done. They have the choice to say no and if they did get in, I would get out and take the stairs.

          Why would you ask them to wait for you? Why not get out and let them take the lift and you take the next lift or take the stairs.

          Let's take this to any other circumstance. Imagine no COVID-19. Let's say that you are in a lift and the door opens and a smelly guy is about to walk in. Would you ask him to wait as well? Or would you get out of the lift and let him take it and take another one?

          • +1

            @p1 ama: Lifts come to whoever is there first. If someone else is in the lift when it gets to me I would happily wait or take the stairs.
            I would have no issue taking the lift with a smelly guy. I am a nurse so smells don’t really bother me.
            The issue is a highly infectious disease that can be asymptomatic is in my neighbourhood. I will do whatever I need to do to protect myself and my young family. If people aren’t doing the same for themselves/loved ones that’s where the problem is. Too many unnecessary risks. People thinking it won’t happen to them.

          • +2

            @p1 ama: this isn't a bad smell. it's a virus that has killed what 200,000 people around the world, babies included.

  • +20

    My building manager has put signs up to say a max of 2 people per lift. That should make me easier to explain.

  • +6

    not really , at workplace building management has imposed the limit 2 person in lift at any point of time

  • -7

    You should have got out
    You deserved a good crop dusting

    Sucks if the lift comes back up and it’s full, goes up more, comes back down and full again.

  • +4

    Let Them In But Go Back To Back

    You mean ass to ass?

    • +1

      lift is approx 1.5m x 1.5m

      No room for even one donkey, let alone two.

  • +13

    if somone in the elevator i was getting in said to me. "can u wait for the next one just for social distancing" i would say yeah ok. but if i walked into an elevator and somone in there looked at me and quickly got out cos i walked in. and said "ill get the next one" that would be worse.

    • +1

      Fragile ego?

      • +7

        like rice paper

  • +13

    Lets be honest people, lifts are a very good place to catch thr virus. Confined space, no fresh air, buttons.

    As the virus is air borne it would only take one infected person to contaminate the lift for atleast a few hours.

    • +1

      only take one infected person to contaminate the lift for atleast a few hours

      Try days! Covid-19 have been found to be viable on most common surfaces up to several days.

      Enjoy pushing that Ground floor button.

  • +2

    The person tried to barge into the lift

    So you were physically blocking them?

    • My recycling box was on the lift floor near the door as I placed it down after getting in but I didn't not make any attempts to physically them

      Where's @MSPaint when you need them?

  • +2

    I would have assumed the same as you, that if you're already in the lift then someone else would wait to get in. Everyone's stressed right now so you were reasonable given the circumstances, and the other person's response was understandable too.

    In any case you're probably much more likely to catch the virus from fomites left on a shared surface like the lift buttons, than standing next to someone and breathing in their water vapour.

  • +6

    The rules at my Parents apartment is 2 people MAX per lift due to Covid 19, surprised there is NO rule set in place.

  • +4

    Haven’t used the lift since this started.

  • +1

    Use the stairs

  • Really OP, you started this with your "Free Case of Corona" post in 11/2019. lol
    https://www.ozbargain.com.au/node/496197

    Must have been lots that chose that over Peroni.

  • -7

    Don't live in an apartment block if you don't want to be surrounded by other people.

    • +4

      Do you mean OP shouldn't be living in an apartment block into which he/she moved in pre-covid because he/she obviously just dislikes "being surrounded by people"?

      • -3

        They can't handle being there now, so it's time to leave. Not inconvenience everyone else, they don't own the building.

        • +1

          So because other people don't want to follow the social distancing laws the op should move out of their apartment?

  • +2

    The next time you're in this situation, just say "Don't come in, I have Coronavirus".

    No more awkwardness asking people not to come in because I guarantee no one will want to come in the lift with you.

    • When the UK was considering allowing those who had already been exposed to COVID-19 to return to work and normal life, there was literally a fear that people who purposefully get infected. So you never know.

    • Coronavirus is very common so I said I have it too and will enter the lift. For someone having COVID-19 then by law they should either stay home for self isolation or should be treated in hospital.

  • +6

    First come first served.

  • +5

    I would ask them to get the next one. We are meant to be social distancing.

  • At 1.5m x 1.5m, you could have one person in each corner 1.5m apart

    • Diagonal corners (just one pair, so two people) would be OK; adjacent corners, not OK - that would be less than 1.5m, (assuming 3-dimensional people).

      • Since OP was with his gf, they could have stood in one corner together. Plenty of space that way.

        • +1

          Due to social distancing from OP, i can stand at the same corner with his gf.

    • On top of the 1.5m distancing rule, Isn’t it also a max of one person per 4 square metres when indoors?

  • +3

    I just pretend I'm going to sneeze as the door opens. Problem solved

  • Ignore them, wait for the next. Hold your breath and move on with life.

  • -5

    "It'd be daft to then enter a confined space with someone." He writes, as he enters a confined space with his girlfriend. Should've asked her to take the stairs too.

    • +5

      Maybe unclear, but we live together so we either both have it or we don't

  • +9

    I think your apartment body corporate/building manager has a responsibility in this. Ours has put a notice in all the floors and all the elevators stating social distancing and only 2 people in at any time. Most people have been adhering to it. Some dont mind and still jump in. If it is someone we know, we generally dont mind bcoz of the level of trust.

    My partner and I who were already on our way down from level 4 was stopped at level 2 and we reminded this person of the note(which had been there for 2 weeks now) and she wasnt impressed. Btw, there are 2 elevators in my building. And we are all restricted to access elevators from other floors via the key tag.

    On the flip side, i saw 2 people plus a dog yest in the elevator and I politely declined to get in and took the next one even though they didnt mind.

    • That s the correct answer.

    • We have the same in our building. According to op's description of the size of the elevator, it's only big enough for one person if we follow the 1 person per 4sqm rule.

  • +6

    Practicality and common sense and most of all CONSIDERATION these days please ppl.

    • +2

      You must live in a parallel universe. Haven't come across that trifecta in one person for ages. I'd settle for 2

    • We're living in a society!!! We're supposed to act in a civilised way!!!

  • +3

    There definitely should be signs in the lift and at every entry stating the 2 people rule.

  • +18

    Really surprised by these poll results. If a lift arrives and you cannot maintain social distancing by getting in, then you should wait for the next one or take the stairs.

    How do most Ozbargainers think it's up to the person already in the lift to leave?

    • +3

      Agreed. With us already in there it is technically "full"

      Pre virus, if the lift was at max capacity and it arrived at their floor would they have said the same?

    • +1

      I am one of those who chose option 4. I didnt choose option 3 because of the way this person responded to OP. I think he was polite, but this person couldn't be considerate. On second thought, I should have chosen 3.unable to change my vote.

  • +2

    There's also a two person limit in our building that has 20+ floors. Waiting for an empty elevator has become a necessary but difficult task. Although from our experience so far, most people are not abiding by the limit.

    • +2

      We have big lifts so it could carry 4 people with 1 in each corner. Best if all 4 people just face their own corner.

      Very strange way of catching a lift if you ask me. But we all have to change and adapt with the time.

      • +1

        Best if all 4 people just face their own corner.

        Good time to watch this Elevator movie… after reading this thread.. 😜
        One of my faves.

        • +1

          Whoa…eerily similar! I was going to say it could fit 5 if someone is brave enough to stand in the middle. Just like in this movie. LOL!

  • +4

    Just request building manager to display a sign requesting max 2 persons per lift except if same household at every level. It will then be considered normal for everyone to request it.

    • Or put one up yourself if they can't be bothered. A lift that small should only contain people from one apartment. Two people can't social distance in it if it's the size OP says.

      • Ok for the size but still better to go through building manager

  • Yes.

  • YES

  • If it’s your girlfriend Then YES

  • +4

    As person starts to enter lift start coughing and sneezing and watch them step back

    P.S I would be them same as you ask them to get the next lift or if they were in the lift I would wait for the next one

  • +2

    Can you put another option in your poll if the person you request doesn't want to abide by it you can do the stairs . Don't be a lazy ass waiting for the lift to come back and you might have the same problem repeatedly .
    Eg if you run into a Bikie ! Had to get the Bikie in :)

  • +3

    You should be taking the stairs if you don't want to be in a lift with other people.

    • Plus you get to exercise without traveling 2 plus hours to go hiking with your girlfreind :)

    • Yep, as mentioned before this is what we normally do. On this occasion we were fully loaded up so needed to use the lift.

  • +1

    Raise it to your strata committee? The lifts on our block now have signs only allowing two people in the lift at a time. Seems to be working well, however our block is quite a small one.

  • That's a dick move on your behalf, you should of taken the stairs if you didn't want to share a lift.

  • At Ikea they have asked for one person in the lift at a time even though they are huge lifts. My husband and I were in one and a bunch of people tried to get in but I waved my hand at them to not come in and everyone obliged! I was very grateful nobody tried to barge in. Ikea were pretty good at emphasising social distancing.

  • +4

    Contrary to most people here I don't think you were an (profanity) by simply asking them to take the next lift. You were trying to protect yourself and your girlfriend, nothing wrong with that.

    I think due to the obvious circumstances of what's happening in the world currently it's a reasonable request, and that's all it seemed to be. You didn't elaborate on the part about the barging in, did you try and physically stop the person? If so that makes you more of a dick.

    The other person was a dick for getting so mad about it and then seemingly giving up. If people didn't bother to ask for things and instead altered their behaviour (i.e. getting out of the lift) because of other people's actions we'd all be pretty spineless.

    • Context r.e. barging in. I had got in and then put the bin bag & recycling box near the door area and stood behind them. I didn't move when the door opened as I was facing the person. The went to step into the lift after being asked not to, then hesitated and turned away.

      • Well doesn't seem like you were a dick about it. I think it's a reasonable request considering the times we're in now.

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