Romance Scammer requesting title of house.

Krizzo on 22/04/2022 - 12:49

Hi Guys,

Not sure where to post this, but kind of desperate for help.

My mother who is 78 has fallen victim to a romance scammer. In her mind, she is in love with and soon to be married to a strapping gentleman who is an orthopedic surgeon working for the UN stationed in Yemen. He's a millionaire but doesn't have access to his funds and wants nothing more than to move to Australia to marry my widowed mother.

So far, to my knowledge she is given him over $20,000 in funds for reasons such as needing money for legal fees to break out of his UN contract, money for plane tickets, helicopter flights and most recently bail money for being framed for carrying drugs on a plane.

My siblings and I have tried to hold an intervention with her to wake her up to her scammer, but she is deeply in love with him and very delusional and showing signs of mental illness.

This has now gotten even more serious and she is seeking to change to will to remove her 4 children from the will and replace it with her scammer.

So far I've tried to contact the police who did not help at all, reported it to every online cybercrime and fraud prevention I could find with no help. I've tried to have a mental health assessment completed but unfortunately, they said she is at no risk of acute mental condition and couldn't help.

I know there are some very smart minds in the OZB community and would love any help or suggestions?

Financial

Comments

  • dust on 22/04/2022 - 12:58
    +7

    Do conservatorships exist in Australia?

    I know Britney didn't have a good experience with hers but this seems like the right situation to be using one!

    • steven6 on 22/04/2022 - 13:06
      +7

      I think our equivalent is the public trustee which seems to rip off victims just as much as this scammer

      • ozbjunkie on 23/04/2022 - 08:39
        +3

        Public trustee is a massive rip off but I don't think they'll change the will. Mum should be declared mentally incompetent… Then again, looking at my own dating past…

  • FoxJump on 22/04/2022 - 12:59
    +3

    Whenever a will gets executed, typically you have to get a probate.
    When that happens you can contest the new will, saying she was not of sound mind, etc. Or it was a scam. At which point they may consider the previous will as the valid one.

    So worst case, if she changes it and passes, you shall immediately take your will and set up the probate to try to make your copy of the will the valid one which will be exercised.

  • deme on 22/04/2022 - 13:00
    +30

    OP please contact your mothers bank with these details, they will often review requests for large transactions.

    You can obtain free advice from IDCare: https://www.idcare.org/
    on 1800 595 160

    • Krizzo on 26/04/2022 - 14:46

      Thank you I've done this now!

  • FoxJump on 22/04/2022 - 13:00
    +13

    Maybe hijack her comms and talk to the scammer pretending to be the cyberpolice of the cybercrime minister ..<<insert big words>> and try to be like a meddling parent trying to ruin her "relationship"

    • freefall101 on 22/04/2022 - 13:36
      +16

      IMO I'd go the path of suddenly changing language, should scare them right off. These people are used to people trying to scam them or track them down and they'll bail pretty quickly.

      "I'm trying to process an update to my will and my lawyer requires to confirm your identity. Can you please send me a photo of your passport, support for your current address, blah blah". Maybe attach a dodgy looking executable as well (just make a batch script that displays a bunch of text in a command window, that'll freak them out) and ask them to run it as part of the process. Make it as obvious as hell that it's someone trying to "catch" them. Since the police aren't doing anything it's not like it'd disrupt an investigation.

      If it was my mum I'd also just kill the lines of communication. If it's facebook, hard block on facebook in the router for a while. Text messages, get in her phone and block that number, etc. Depends on how one feels about manipulating their mum (even if it is for her own good).

  • deme on 22/04/2022 - 13:01
    +5

    Bikies?

    • Xistn on 22/04/2022 - 13:56
      +5

      eScooters these days bruh

  • holdenmg on 22/04/2022 - 13:04
    +1

    Depending on your State (or Territory) you may like to approach the Guardianship Board (or equiv) or ask her Doctor or ask your Doctor.

  • Banana3 on 22/04/2022 - 13:14
    +13

    OP, so sorry to hear about your mother. I don't know if this would work, but if nothing else works it's probably worth contacting one of the YouTubers who do this kind of stuff, i.e. reverse scamming the scammers / stopping scammers to do further damage.

    They do this for a living in their YouTube channel, so they might be interested to help. Jim Browning is one of them that I've seen helping a woman in the same situation.

    • Krizzo on 26/04/2022 - 14:46

      Will check it out, thank you

  • garetz on 22/04/2022 - 13:19

    I would say your only option is to have her committed and get power of attorney.

  • iNeed2Pee on 22/04/2022 - 13:21
    +5

    Holy shit this is horrible.
    Older people seem to be hooked onto this shit.

    Grab every piece of tech she uses and hide it from her. Burn it, crush it, do whatever.

    Tell her he's not reachable anymore. Easier said than done, im just clutching here for you because old people tend to be set in their ways.

      • cupcake on 22/04/2022 - 15:23
        +2

        Australians have lost $800 million in scams so far but ok.
        $34 million was lost in January 2022 alone.
        People need to be so careful!

        • deme on 22/04/2022 - 15:29
          -5

          I'm responding to: old people tend to be set in their ways

      • Quantumcat on 22/04/2022 - 15:27
        +5

        It would be cheaper to hire her an escort regularly

      • iNeed2Pee on 22/04/2022 - 15:31
        +2

        I have compassion for you if you think like that.

    • Krizzo on 26/04/2022 - 14:47
      +1

      She's not going to like it, but this is probably the best option at this point

  • Muzeeb on 22/04/2022 - 13:25
    +3

    Is it the tinder swindler?

  • Jugganautx on 22/04/2022 - 13:26

    Delusions of grandeur

    • CrowReally on 22/04/2022 - 13:53
      +11

      No one is disputing that (which doesn't seem much like an 'opinion' either. Owners own things, got it)

      This isn't a "does mum have the right to give her stuff away?" thread, it's a "mum is being tricked, how can we prevent her from being scammed?" thread.

      I'm quite surprised a crypto-shill has a 'people entered into legally binding agreements willingly and that's that no further questions' take on scamming, though.

      • rektrading on 22/04/2022 - 13:53
        -6

        Hi,

        Are you new here?

        • CrowReally on 22/04/2022 - 13:54
          +8

          In other news, I'm proud of you for not mentioning crypto in either of these posts. Trying new things is the pathway to being less of a meme.

      • rektrading on 22/04/2022 - 13:56
        -2

        Property rights is a basic human right under UDHR Article 17.

        Some people may not care about that but I do.

      • rektrading on 22/04/2022 - 13:59
        -2

        I've tried to have a mental health assessment completed but unfortunately, they said she is at no risk of acute mental condition and couldn't help.

        The children are trying to use the Court system to impose restrictions on the mother's right to manage the property the way she wants.

        • CrowReally on 22/04/2022 - 14:00
          +5

          Whether the mother has a mental condition that would invalidate her right to dispose of property is an option that was explored. This is the correct thing to do.

          • rektrading on 22/04/2022 - 14:01
            -2

            @CrowReally: Like I said.

            The property belongs to the mother and she has the right to do whatever she wants with it.

            That is the core value of property rights.

            • CrowReally on 22/04/2022 - 14:03
              +2

              @rektrading: Mentally ill people don't have the ability to enter into those agreements and need to be assessed. Handwave it away as much as you like, but your "but won't someone think of the UN Charter on Property Rights???" take is terrible. Develop perspective.

              You should have gone with "Maybe the dude is legit and they're in love, why are they trying to stop her being happy" and farm some serious attention that way.

              • rektrading on 22/04/2022 - 14:05
                +1

                @CrowReally: The Court didn't agree with the applicant.

                They made the right call to protect the mother's rights.

    • deme on 22/04/2022 - 15:06
      +7

      If I was in this situation I'd want me kids fighting for me.
      It's not the inherience they want or money, they are fighting for the mother, against the scammer.

      • rektrading on 22/04/2022 - 15:13
        -6

        If I was in this situation I'd want me kids fighting for me.

        It's your right to want your children to restrict your ability to manage the property.

        The mother in this case is exercising her right to dispose of the property the way she wants to. The children don't have to agree or respect it.

          • rektrading on 22/04/2022 - 15:23

            @deme: Punish the offender. Don't punish the victim.

            • deme on 22/04/2022 - 15:30
              +3

              @rektrading: Are you saying just keep letting her transfer money to a criminal?
              And focus on punishing the criminal?

              How about preventing the loss and also punishing the criminal.

              • rektrading on 22/04/2022 - 15:38
                -1

                @deme: Prevent the crime without infringing on the mother's property rights.

            • Ughhh on 22/04/2022 - 18:27
              +1

              @rektrading:

              Punish the offender

              How do you supposed op, or even the cops do this? These kinds of scammers pop up everywhere.
              What's worst is that, the scammers may have passed on her details to others scammers, knowing the chance of her falling for another scam is high.

              • rektrading on 22/04/2022 - 18:32
                -2

                @Ughhh:

                How do you supposed op, or even the cops do this? These kinds of scammers pop up everywhere.

                This is a question for law enforcement.

                • Ughhh on 22/04/2022 - 18:48

                  @rektrading: You think the cops here will have much power over people in another country?

                  If you wait for others to save you/your mother, you'll be waiting forever.

                  • rektrading on 22/04/2022 - 19:07
                    -3

                    @Ughhh: I'm sure Australian law enforcement knows what to do.

                    • Ughhh on 22/04/2022 - 19:21
                      +1

                      @rektrading: Yes, that's why this decade old scam no longer exist……. Wait.

                      Knowing and being able to act are two different things.

  • Cave Fire on 22/04/2022 - 13:52
    +7

    Do some research with the keywords he used, maybe the scammer has some victims already. You can also do a reverse image search of pics he sent using Tineye. Maybe once it is seen that he is "cheating" on her, she will stop the communication herself. Perhaps it was featured on a current affair, 60 min or other websites? The show breaks down the fake pics and shows the scammers behind it. Maybe seeing other victims will help.

    Found this Google
    quora with pics

  • steven6 on 22/04/2022 - 13:53

    Do you have the scammers details?

    • Krizzo on 26/04/2022 - 14:48

      Have some details, pics, fake names and bank accounts

  • Hithere on 22/04/2022 - 13:55

    Some helpful hints and contact information on the ScamWatch site.

    https://www.scamwatch.gov.au/get-help/where-to-get-help

  • screensaver on 22/04/2022 - 14:13
    +2

    Contact the Federal Police. also the Guardianship Board

  • dogboy on 22/04/2022 - 14:38

    Another tact - create a dating profile for her on whatever appropriate dating app there is and try and find her someone who is real so she forgets the scammer.

    • Krizzo on 26/04/2022 - 14:48

      Long term this will hopefully be a good ida

  • cupcake on 22/04/2022 - 14:40
    +1

    You need to cut off your mother's phone line and internet asap.
    He can correspond via snail mail with accompanying photos.

  • deme on 22/04/2022 - 15:17
    +13

    If you haven't already collect these details:
    name and photos of the scammer
    username, email, phone numbers, addresses of the scammer.
    Bank accounts the scammer used etc
    Which services they used.

    Now with this prioritise them based on what you know your mum uses.
    Contact each service's abuse team (pm me if you need help with that I work in this field) with the information.

    Contact her bank (I assume you've done this already) about the transactions, the aim is to stop future fraud, getting money back woud be great but lets focus on the now.

    Increase social support for your mum, people get scammed, no matter how smart or savvy or even if they are "security expert" they get scammed she needs a supportive voice you've already shown you are supportive but she might need more convincing.

    Finally with the details you collected send them over to Crime Stoppers, not for you but for everyone.
    The more details the better chances they have of stopping/even catching the person.
    People get busted for this even in Nigeria.

    Lastly since we might as well try get in contact with journalists covering this like https://krebsonsecurity.com/

    • Krizzo on 26/04/2022 - 14:56

      Thanks for the advice. I'm working on it now

  • Quantumcat on 22/04/2022 - 15:28

    Send the details to the Catfish TV show. They might be able to expose the scam and convince your mother what's happening.

    • Krizzo on 26/04/2022 - 14:49

      There is a catfish tv show? I'm guessing it youtube?

      • Quantumcat on 26/04/2022 - 15:16
        +1

        MTV. Not sure if it is on YouTube. You can get it on SBS here in Australia

  • Hithere on 22/04/2022 - 18:23
    -2

    Not sure where to post this,

    How about Whirlpool kaiser21?

    https://forums.whirlpool.net.au/thread/9z4ykzk4

  • Benoffie on 22/04/2022 - 19:03

    https://www.scamwatch.gov.au/ - report this person and get your Mum the professional help.

  • ozboygsl on 23/04/2022 - 09:11
    +1

    Having had LOTS of experience with public trustees, AVOID THEM LIKE THE PLAGUE! Now, re your mom. get legal advice asap regarding having someone administer her finances and try to include a sympathetic medical/mental health practitioner of some description.

  • OzPandaGirl on 23/04/2022 - 09:32

    Hopefully a good lawyer will be suspicious about your mum making a drastic change to her will. My dad, 92, recently changed his will as unfortunately it is now only him and me left. The lawyer had him do some cognitive testing before finalising his changes.

  • Bronnie on 23/04/2022 - 10:55
    +2

    So sorry that this has happened to your mum.
    Perhaps an earlier suggestion to increase your social interaction with your mum, might reduce her reliance on this scammer. They prey on the lonely.

    Our neighbour's brother was a victim. He never married and lived in another town. Though in the early days, he was reasonably wealthy, he lost virtually it all when he got hooked by an online scammer. Although at times, he partially believed that he was being fooled, and he at least once, tried to give up the interaction for a time. But it didn't last because the online scammer (who also phoned him constantly) was his "good friend" who just needed financial help. This was going on for years, even when he became an aged pensioner, living in cheap rented accommodation. My understanding is his brothers legally managed to organise for Centrelink to withhold (or pay?) his rent, before allowing him the rest of his pension, because he otherwise was always falling behind. He lived for his interaction with this "friend". The story I got was that, even when he was dying of some illness, in hospital, the scammer would ring him nearly every day and have another sob story to try to get money from him. It is a very sad tale.

    • Krizzo on 26/04/2022 - 14:51

      This is also the sad case with my mother. I think deep down she knows is being scammed, but still loved the attention of having somone call her and tell her how much he loved her every day

  • HelpMeiCantSee on 23/04/2022 - 13:25
    +1

    Cut her phone line/nbn line and smash her phone. Make it impossible for her to communicate with them. Make it impossible for her to communicate with them.

    See if you can get their details, pose as your mum and modify the terms of the relationship. Also, there is a great bloke on YouTube who trolls the scammers and deletes their stuff, reach out to him with any info you can get, I would be surprised if he doesn’t take them down.

    • Krizzo on 26/04/2022 - 14:51

      Will check it out thank you

  • theguru1 on 23/04/2022 - 17:53

    Unfortunately if your mother wants to give away all her money and assets there isn't much you can do about it unless you can prove she isn't of right mind, which as you've discovered isn't simple.

  • Benno007 on 23/04/2022 - 20:05
    +3

    It’s really sad that with the increase in online scamming, the police don’t do anything except report on the amount of money lost. These crimes are often worse than a robbery, yet they don’t do anything? Pretty sad state of affairs.

    My nane is 96 and is constantly getting hit up by people scamming her out of passwords and bank details. After a few Different scams where thankfully she didn’t lose money, she was giving her bank details to someone. After she hung up she thought that didn’t seem right- she called the family, and we got her to call the bank immediately and they froze her accounts, thankfully before she lost anything.

    • Krizzo on 26/04/2022 - 14:53
      +1

      Interesting read… I need to find that guys contact details!

  • Misplaced on 24/04/2022 - 12:36
    +1

    Have seen this happen before with a lady I knew very casually. We could all see what was going on. She posted things like "I'm Engaged !!!!" and the like - now she was an older lady and the military gentleman in the photos holding the babies considerably younger. It just didn't seem like a realistic scenario. Also there were very sad things where she expressed that she felt she was being ignored and taken for granted (the scammer probably had a number of them on the go at once). When there is emotional involvement, people just aren't rational. It was clear that she was going to be hurt, it was just a question of when.

    I tried to suggest as casually as I could that she could use tineye.com on photos to see where they have been posted before (the results in this particular case were quite enlightening).

    I think eventually she had her own suspicions and came to her senses. But she was in fairly deep so I have no doubt that she would have been 'approached' for funds. I think they get to a point where they will believe anything.

  • Keen Bargain Hunter on 24/04/2022 - 12:39
    -4

    be happy for your mum. its not her job to leave adults with an inheritance. its well over due - she should she worry about herself. I know its probably not what you want to hear, but is her being happy more important to you?

    • Kallavan14 on 24/04/2022 - 12:45
      +5

      So you're saying they should be happy that their mum is being scammed?

      • Keen Bargain Hunter on 24/04/2022 - 19:44

        its obvious that her mum doesnt feel like shes being scammed. perhaps they should approach the gentleman involved and see what his involvement in this to clarify matters. Asking perfect strangers for options are only suggestions - we dont really know the details.- so were only making assumptions and speculations.

        • cookie2 on 03/05/2022 - 22:23
          +1

          So try and talk reasonably to the scammer? Appeal to their moral ethics? Yeah, sounds like the best option here /s

  • KozieSeller on 24/04/2022 - 12:56

    Of course yous would care about your elders assets now until you have to care of them, then its off to Daycare, like all the bogans blaming the nurses who take care for them on news

  • wozz on 24/04/2022 - 13:04

    Id contact a financial counsellor and see if they can offer assistance. Free service and I'm sure they could give some advice
    https://moneysmart.gov.au/managing-debt/financial-counsellin…

    • Krizzo on 26/04/2022 - 14:55

      Will check it out thanks

  • [Deactivated] on 24/04/2022 - 13:24
    +2

    Basically every girl on Onlyfans asking blokes to send them money just to chat to them.

    The world is full of scammers.

    I always thought when people get old, they get angry and if their kids don't look after them that they threaten them with leaving them out of the will 🤣

    These situations suck, but what if your 78 year old father was at strip clubs every week blowing all his money? It's still their money, and their life.

    • Quantumcat on 26/04/2022 - 15:19
      +1

      Guys on onlyfans shouldn't be under any illusion that the girl is on there just to chat to them and no one else

  • buffalo bill on 24/04/2022 - 13:45

    Get her mental health assessed, and take financial guardianship. Move all assets out of her name.

    It's not a fun process, and you will be judged, but you will ultimately ensure your Mum is comfortable in her old age and not ripped off.

    • rektrading on 24/04/2022 - 14:28

      Move all assets out of her name.
      not ripped off.

      Taking away the mother's assets isn't getting ripped off?

      • buffalo bill on 24/04/2022 - 15:30
        +2

        Who's going to look after OP's Mum in her late old age? OP and their siblings are… not the Nigerian prince.

        This is a difficult adjustment for any family; but I've watched the consequences when the adult children have reduced financial resources to deal with a parent in their care (family had to go back to single income as one significant income was lost, strain on relationship, lifestyle downgrade, no holidays, then separation).

        OP's Mum's assets are her way of life and need to be protected in any way possible including removing her ability to transfer or lose them. The intention is especially clear-cut if OP/siblings hold Financial Power of Attorney.

        This situation is exactly why Financial Power of Attorney and Guardianships exist.

  • screensaver on 25/04/2022 - 00:53
    -1

    also contact a lawyer for advice

  • [Deactivated] on 03/05/2022 - 21:06
    +1

    start faking emails from scammer. Make her think he is breaking up with her. hack her inbox, monitor and delete his messages. replace her phone, contacts, impersonate the scammer

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