Neighbour Issues - Advice Greatly Appreciated

Hi,
I'm having an issue with my neighbour. Its not the home owner I believe it is a relative of his staying at the house. Neighbour has young kids, they never seem to leave the house and constantly shouting and screaming, I'm talking blood curdling horror movie screams, there's never any supervision or parenting.

This screaming/shouting can occur any time of day or night, 5am, midday, 4pm, 10pm, even woke me up at 3am. I've caught the parent encouraging the kids to scream and shout through the holes in the fence. I was working in the garden and they were banging on it really loudly so I asked them to stop, I aslo asked them why they scream so much, at this point the parent put her head over the fence and began shouting out me saying the kids are allowed to scream, who do I think i am, I've lived here for so many years, etcetera.

She was really aggressive and my partner is scared of her. There is a complete lack of supervision, many times seen the youngest climbing on the house roof and cars with no correction. They also have a dog which is neglected, its locked in the house/out of the house all day/night. The poor dog is so broken, just barks constantly when left alone, and again, this can be all night, early morning, whenever. Been several occasions where neighbour is home, dog is locked in the house barking and she plays loud music. Never seen this dog leave the house, never seen it out of the yard. I sent the council barking dog letter to her and she put it back in our letterbox!

I would really appreciate some guidance here as I have tried talking to them about it but have got absolutely nowhere, tried again today as we got woken at 7 30am by the screams and shouting. As there is rarely an adult around I asked the kids through the fence if they could keep it down, they didnt so i went out again and asked to speak to the their grandpa who owns the house. I spoke to him in a polite manner about all these issues and all i got was its unfortunate that you bought the house next door. He then said something Iike 'stop chatting up the kids', i pulled him up on that repeatedly asked what he meant by that but got no answer. I'm really upset about that comment, in 10 months thats the first time ive spoken to the kids. Bumped into the family who live directly across from us and they even can hear all the noise, my other neighbour too. I would be so grateful for any advice, never had bad neighbours before.

thanks

***so three days after i talked to the owner it's been pretty good. I initially wanted to speak to him about the need to replace the old asbestos fence, just the section between the house. little bit of retaining too but having a proper fence in this section will help us no end with the sound issues, also knew they don't work so prob don't want to spend money on the fence. checked the legislation and no repairing that fence and it almost every circumstance its 50/50, i know the mother seemed to think 'it was whoever wanted it paid done and how the guy who lived here was gonna do it before he died". So that definitely hurt them, hopefully it stays that way and we get a fence there and the rest can be mitigated by the shrubs. I've also started renovating a horse float for a mobile bar and I've parked it right on boundary. Been a lot of grinder work, satisfying!

Thanks almost everyone for the responses there were some crackers in there I'll definitely be implementing. cheers

Comments

        • +3

          I did , sometimes too much.

    • +13

      Thought you might have been my neighbour until the busted arm part and location check, I always prayed that the neighbours might call the police, and maybe they did if no one ever showed up. It’s disappointing that when I was younger all of my attempts for help were dismissed because my parents were perceived as hard working and lived in a good area. I wish just one adult was affirming of me, I might have opened up beyond the verbal abuse and talked about the physical abuse, but based on the reception I got I assumed nothing would be done about either.

      • +5

        That sounds awful 😔

      • +1

        Mate, I hope you’re doing better now and getting the right support around you. That breaks my heart hearing some of what you went through. Kids are so innocent and I can’t imagine the evil inside a parent to hurt their own child.

      • +1

        exactly this, the kids are the real victims here. its horrible for us now but our life will move on from this, they will be bound to it for all or the majority of their life

    • +4

      You can always go to your state MP and ask them why the police don't step up to stop child abuse. Gets a pretty fast response especially if you ask their media team for an official response and tell them you will publish the question and answer.

    • +1

      That's unsettling

  • +15

    Take a recording of them screaming. Play it back to them at twice the volume. Better yet, add a bit of a beat to it and make it I to a song. Thinking 'get on the beers' style

  • +14

    Get some blood and bone and put it all the way along the fence where they they scream from as it will stink.

    • +1

      yea nice idea

    • +9

      Or dynamic lifter. Nothing quite as fine as chook poop as a deterrent.

  • +7

    The fun of neighbours from hell. Having had a similar experience, my best course of action was to ring up the cops, talk to one their community liaison officers & proffer how much stress you have now been put through via the local coppers not involving themselves, whereby you 'may' mention you could lose self-control and it'll become a national news story. They'll pay them a visit, then request you call them each time it happens again.

  • +5

    Are the kids disabled? In some cases screaming can be encouraged as a tactic to level them out (should be replaced with a better coping mechanism down the road if this is the case)

    If not, I suggest you begin enjoying your yard to the fullest! Blood and bone as suggested, get a smoker, every time the wash clothes etc start smoking meat 😂 cook outdoors with things such as prawn paste, use the fire to dry out Carolina reapers etc etc.

    The only one who wins these is the one who goes furthest.

    • good call, its about pushing buttons for a reaction now. i just stay calm and smile while she loses her mind. she was abusing me over the fence the other day, meanwhile the youngest boy is chewing on a broken piece of asbestos

      • +1

        Take a video of them chewing asbestos. They will have to act in emergency ! It is not even safe for you if they are playing with asbestos in their garden ! Obviously you have to be sure it is asbestos.

        • Chewing asbestos now creates problems in about 40 years.

          • +1

            @Muzeeb: Do you think it is ok for them to die at 44yo because their parents took a bad decision ? Oh and the neighbour knew about it and did nothing.

            • @cbastien: Not at all. I'm just advising that there will be no obvious immediate detrimental issues. Mesothelioma will not present until that child is an adult.

      • Yum!

      • +1

        If you legitimately suspect that this is asbestos, then I'm not even sure you should delay doing something about it. The discomfort of living near these people is one thing, but child welfare is another altogether. Even if the material isn't asbestos, I can't imagine ingesting/inhaling other construction fibres is something you can ignore.

        The issue is that if other services become involved, the parents will likely believe the report came from you and may retaliate.

        I work with kids who scream like you have described and I could literally hear it as I read your post. I'm pretty sure I've sustained some hearing damage and now experience tinnitus. It's not just a bit of noise, I literally do not understand how these kids can hit the decibel level that they do. If I were you I would just move out…

    • honestly sounds like all the house has ADHD, autism or some other neurodivergence

  • +6

    Please make a report to the child abuse report line in your state. Google it and you’ll get the number. Goodness knows what those children are experiencing :(

  • +1

    There's a high pitched sound you can find on youtube. Put a Bluetooth speaker by the fence and play this sound at full volume when the kids are in the yard.

    It's not going to solve the problem, but they may go back inside which might soften the noise.

    Alternatively, move. Even if you somehow got them kicked out, they still know where you live.

  • +1

    I feel for you OP, the kids next door are constantly banging the Basketball against the fence and the backboard, all day from 7am to 7pm. I work from home and it drives me insane.

    • Don't they go to school?

      • Yeah i believe so but seem to have a lot of home days

  • +2

    There's a saying don't get mad, get even!

    Install several remote controlled security alarms facing their house, under your roof gutter if possible and opposite their windows.

    When they're asleep, keep setting off the alarm repeatedly until they start yelling at you to turn off the alarm.

  • +5

    thanks guys, its such a tricky subject. thought it would be easier to get this sorted but nobody wants to know. I'll talk to a community engagement officer on monday. the kids are not disabled, they're not bad kids they just have no guidance and haven't been taught any social skills by the mum. pretty sure there's a gvt department visiting them because i keep seeing a late model white Hyundai there which is the standard gvt car here. think I'll keep winding her up, pretty sure she'll snap and do something the police will be interested in.
    Its not a bad area just going through gentrification, we're in a pocket between freo and port coogee. both suburbs median over 1 million now, just a few of these kinda people left. not even her house she free loads of the grandpa, no job, no hobbies, no parenting, can smell the house when she opens the windows. we love the house and area so we want to keep it, think we might rent it out and look for another fixer upper. thanks for the replies, appreciate it.

    • +3

      Your in WA then read my solution below, i spent 37yrs in wapol retired 3 months ago, spent most of career in Armadale, biggest sh#$hole you can get, neighbour argument capital of the world. The incident below was there.

      • +3

        hey Wayne, thanks so much for your reply mate really appreciate the inside info. I know Armadale, you would of had a busy career.
        I'm really angry about the 'don't chat up the kids comment', he was accusing me of paedophilia. Ive spoken to the twice, infact i have actively ignored them since we moved in. Do you think its a good move to go down the local station and speak to a communities officer about that comment? its disgusting, what person in their right mind would say something like that

        • +3

          Good move to speak to local coppers, although the paedophilia comments disgusting, just make minor mention of it as its defamation a civil matter, may look like your upset just over that. Keep it all about breaching the peace. Keep extensive records call police everytime even if they dont show its recorded and you can get access to those records. Residential tribunal if its state housing but u said private. Council mostly useless its actually their jurisdiction but they dont work 24/7 so palm everything off to police, same with Department of Family and Children Services (if genuine concerns for kids they do Keep good records) but again no weekends no 24/7 so its handballed to police, every government agency hand balls their tasks to Police fact of life. But im not a doctor psychiatrist counsellor, livestock animal handler, paramedic or many other things im supposed to be.

          Court house ask about mro if its starts being more serious as in threats violence etc then it be a vro n legal aid will assist with vro. Vro are also alot more serious in eyes of Every government agency.

    • +4

      Definition

      A Misconduct Restraining Order is an order made by the Court to restrain a person (known as the respondent or when an order is made, the person bound) from either breaching the peace, causing fear, damaging property or intimidating another person (known as the person seeking to be protected or person protected when an order is made). A Misconduct Restraining Order may be issued when a person behaves in an intimidating or offensive manner, which may lead to a breach of the peace or damage to property. A Misconduct Restraining Order only applies to people who are not in a domestic or family relationship.

    • +1

      In your case breach of the peace or intimidation would be factors.

      Misconduct Restraining Order is not same as a Violence Restraining Order .

      Acronym MRO VS VRO

  • -6

    You could always move. Just sayin'

    • +3

      Yeah because that's like a cheap and easy option

    • In this housing market? Hahaha

    • we have the wheels in motion although we want to keep the property because everything else about it and the street is good. we'll rent it and find another fixer upper

  • Start writing to the Ministers office, govt depts dont like having to respond to the ministers office. They cant do much, but its still worth it.

    RSPCA for the dog, care & protection etc for the kids

  • +2

    Not much of a useful advice other than the local council/state government resources that others have already mentioned.

    However, while the retaliation tactics may read fun, but it'll be wise to avoid anything that'll negatively affect other neighbours who are also being affected by the noises. On that matter, if you can reach out to other surrounding neighbours also affected by the noise, which you've mentioned about the one opposite the road, and maybe if all of you do enquiries/complaints to relevant authorities, that might give them more urgency?

  • +3

    Disappointed the thread took this long to get to:
    "Bikies"

    • +1

      I think you mean “call Lydia”

  • +9

    This is why I hate children and abortion should always remain legal.

    • +7

      It's not called abortion after they are 3 years old.

      • +5

        needs a screening system, she is not fit to look after animals or children

  • +16

    Depending on your state , but i successfully helped residents here in WA obtain a misconduct restraining order against a neighbour with 20 caged pink n grey galahs going off at all day n night. I (local copper at the time) spoke to him sensibly, saying i heard noise on all 3 shifts n it was excessive. His response piss off my property. Council was not interested so helped 3 neighbours compile misconduct restraining order. Had hearing magistrate ruled in their favour. Stipulated hours of reasonable noise.

    Bloke ignored it , after 1st of 2 summons n fines he removed most of the birds to a sanctuary.

    Persistence pays off.

    • 🙌

    • You were awesome to help so much. Wish all coppers were like you!

      • +1

        Ex Copper. Forcibly retired unfit do to work injuries, no workers compensation or golden handshake for us WA coppers, just a thanks n cya letter.

        But Your welcome , and i do miss one thing in 37yrs ive never had to buy socks, hmm ill miss those free black socks and ummm nothing else 😢

        Just 1 of many incidents took me 5yrs to evict whole family from 1 Street. Think the 100 plus residents still send 2 cartons too the station each Xmas 8-)

        N we got an 80% decrease in crime in 12km square radius and a " You bastard " email from oic of station where they were re housed in far away from us.

        • I have the utmost respect mate. Such a tough job and so damn underpaid and under-respected. Sorry that you were treated so poorly after having to retire. You guys really see the shit of society. I can’t even imagine….

  • +3

    Work out when they sleep and never let them. People who are sleep deprived do crazy stuff. Unfortunately police or council won't help you. If they're renting making them want to move is your only option

  • +6

    Call child protection, tell them you're worried the children are being abused therefore shouting all the time

  • +3

    Call police if there noise is outside the usual acceptable times. Have been in the same situation and it’s not pleasant. The neighbour was definitely psycho and took better part of 2-3 years before she was evicted. I can only sympathise for you and your family, there is no single answer. My only advice is not to let it consume your life as hard as it can be at times.

  • +2

    Parents have mental health issues and/or drug effected, essentially: nothing you can do, other than to literally suck it up or move house.

    Trying to communicate with these people is like talking to a brick wall. Common sense and logic just will not work.

  • +1

    Yeah there are scumbags in this world.

    record as much as you can if you need to reference it for any reports to whoever will take them, cops? council? idk

  • +3
    • ive extended the fence they just stick their heads over it.

  • +1

    sound cancelling headphones

  • +3

    Can't believe all the childish suggestions here, the solution is simple. Bikies

  • +1

    Where u live ? Suburb and state please

  • +3

    Definitely police for blood curdling screams. And I’d call child services. Those poor kids.

  • +6

    Consult with all your neighbour's, form a neighborhood co-operation and proceed with a surprise intervention.

    Should serve as a shock to those occupants seeing dozens of people with pitchforks storming the property.

    • ive thought about this after bumping into the fella across the road. the people opposite this house must get it bad too

      • Definitely this. Join forces with the other neighbours, be persistent, complain with the rangers, the council, the police, Rspca. Take legal action. Take it as a hobby to make these people's life as miserable as possible until they either stop or leave. Keep fighting brother.✊🏼

  • +1

    Sounds like you have bogan neighbours. Not much you can practically accomplish. I would lay low and don't escalate things. Hopefully they move out eventually.

  • Sorry to hear about your situation.

    I had a similar situation, but much milder version. Old complaining spinster with mental issues.

    My problem was only solved once I moved, unfortunately. I really liked that place too, lost all the stamp duty etc I paid on it (Vic!) but no idea what else you can do.

  • +2

    I would definately get in touch with all surrounding neighbours to see what you can do as a group.

    Maybe a (polite) intervention of some kind?

    If you do try anything like being noisy back you can become their nemesis (in their mind), but if it's 4 neighbours doing it that might be different.

  • +3

    Install a security camera and a sensor light that points towards the fence. Sometimes people behave when they realise they are being recorded.

  • -1

    I can't believe I'm going to suggest this but…

    Bikies!

    No but seriously sounds like you've got enough to apply for an Intervention Order at the Magistrates Court. Especially since the mother is so aggressive towards you.

    Their behaviour sounds like it is really effecting your enjoyment of your property and your quality of living. If you can get an IO in place everytime she breaches it the cops can charge her.

  • Get a megaphone and denounce them at full volume. And if you can afford it, keep suing until you bankrupt them.

    Bikies are sick of doing everyone's dirty work. Get tough or get moving.

  • Genuine situation for Bikies.

  • Tracey Grimshaw! - A Current Affair, gobless.

    • Better hurry she is retiring next month

  • +2

    Call rspca about the dog. And call child services about the kids. Nothing may happen, but they’ll know that they keep getting reported. They won’t like it.

  • How sensitive is your nose/sealed is your house? Time for the stinkiest fertiliser

  • Scream back at the kids. Abuse the mother. Beat them at their own game.

  • +4

    first ascertain who owns the property - google the address to find the last sold date, and if it was most recently advertised for rent by an agent, in which case call the agent and tell them the occupants are breaching their lease conditions, i.e. standard NSW lease condition

    '16.3 not to interfere, or cause or permit interference, with the reasonable peace, comfort or privacy of neighbours' -

    https://www.fairtrading.nsw.gov.au/__data/assets/pdf_file/00…

    repeated breaches are grounds for termination of a tenancy agreement.

    If it is owned by the relative, try to contact the owner directly and say they are disturbing neighbours with their noise and behaviour.

    Suss out the owner with suggestions they may not be maintaining the property and may be damaging it - as reasons why they might think twice about letting nasty relatives run riot in the neighbourhood.

    Otherwise record dates/times/sounds when they are disturbing - as a log for police or local council or agent or the owner as evidence of the repeated disturbances.

  • +1

    Please report this family to child protective services - they may already be known to them, tell you are concerned about neglect. They will investigate and then the kids will be in the system.

  • +2

    Times like this I'm so grateful I have awesome neighbors on both sides. Not only super quiet but always keeping the street tidy and cutting my grass. I return the favor in other helpful ways. They also have kids but don't let them run feral like some. I do have some (harmless) bogans across the road but there's enough distance there not to care so much.

  • -3

    Sorry but couldn’t give 2 shits about people. Ring the RSPCA about the poor dog being neglected.

    • What a horrible, antisocial, borderline psychopathic thing to say.

  • -7

    My condolences on having to live next to ALP voters, truly the worst kind of people in the world.

    • Nah they sound like the typical "eff off we're full" bogans, so they would be LNP supporters.

  • +2

    My old neighbours daughters screamed every morning. One day I told the single dad that every time his kids wake me up they are going to get a dose of slayer full ball till midnight.

    So did that a few nights, then upped it to cannibal corpse and a few others. Even out Rick Ashley on repeat and went to sleep with ear buds in

    Quickly stopped.

    • You're a legend. 👍

    • I call BS

      • come move next to me and try me
        eye for an eye, or noise for a noise

    • dean martin live at the sands works great

  • +1

    This is one of the reasons I still rent. Back in the day, neighbours by in large used to make a proper effort to get along with each other, spend time with each other, and become real and dear friends over time. This was actually a huge appeal of buying your own home and in certain neighborhoods so you can forge these relationships

    Nowadays with the amount of screens and socials we are exposed to, families are becoming increasingly insular and less tolerant of real world scenarios. People are also more entitled

    Luck of the draw really - for me when I get a situation where I cannot do much or is giving me too much stress, as a last resort, I just up and go and move on to the next property

  • -1

    I'll probably going to get negged for this input, but whatever.. Maybe worth a try if all else failed.

    TLDR: Have BBQ and invite them casually, if they are out at front. Give them simple christmas present.

    Christmas is coming, a good excuse to organise a "Frontyard BBQ" and invite nearby neighbours. Not a backyard one, as it would be too intimate and invading your privacy too much at this point. Good time to socialise with other neighbour as well if you have just moved in.

    If you see them outside on the day, invite them (especially the kids) to grab some food and drink.
    Prepare a simple Christmas present for their kids and the adult in the house as well. Nothing fancy or expensive, just a gesture of good will. You will be surprised on how the kids attitude may change after receiving present from someone that they dont know.

    Sometimes, the key to adult's heart is through their kids. And sometimes, care (being noticed and feel loved) is what someone need, to slowly starting change how one would behave, even better if they feel like they dont deserve it.

    Worst case, they rejected your kind offer, abused you for whatever crazy reason, but you get to socialise with your other new neighbours. Life will be the same with them, prior to you organising this BBQ, but you get to know your other neighbours better and they might share some tips on how the others dealt with them for years in that neighbourhood.

    • +2

      Mate, you’ve never dealt with ferals or bullies before. they don’t respond to nice approaches. They just see that as weakness.

  • Sounds like you live in shankston

  • +1

    i would be careful retaliating against people who seem to be clearly unhinged
    if it comes to a contest of who can get the craziest they will win

  • I’m watching this thread OP. Let us know how you go. I’ve had feral neighbours a few times and got just some generally unpleasant ones right now so I feel for ya. I’d love to live in an area where you have to pass a test to live there LOL

    • +1

      I’d love to live in an area where you have to pass a test to live there LOL

      Jail?

Login or Join to leave a comment