Who Has The Right to Handle The Merchandise While You Are Paying for It?

frugalftw on 26/09/2023 - 18:42
Last edited 26/09/2023 - 22:26 by 1 other user

Hi OzB,

I had an experience at Bunnings today, just want to know what was the right thing to do.

So I had some timber picked out in a trolley, while the cashier was trying to figure out the length to ring it up, another customer started handling my timber to help out. It was uncalled for, but the cashier didn’t raise an eyebrow, so I thought maybe it’s someone they knew. But he wasn’t wearing the uniform, so I asked if he worked there, he said no. The cashier still didn’t say anything and just went on and pretended it’s not happening. That customer proceeded to remove it from the trolley, hold it in his arm, and returned the trolley to the bay. He then handed it to me when I finished paying. I had to carry it out of the store in my hands.

My question is: who owns the item at this stage? Is it still considered store property so it’s fair for anyone else to do whatever to it? I mean, it’s mid-transaction, does the store have a responsibility to make sure it’s protected from other customers?

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Comments

          • garetz on 26/09/2023 - 22:58
            +7

            @frugalftw: You are in the process of purchasing it, its not like the items are in a state of flux. Would you go to Woolworths and let people take stuff out of your trolley ? I very much doubt it.

            • frugalftw on 26/09/2023 - 23:02

              @garetz: I guess in my perception it only belongs to me once the money changes hands, that’s how I treat my customers. Never had anyone taking stuff out of my trolley before, didn’t know it’s a thing 😩 I was also having to talk to the cashier too at the same time, a bit distracted.

              • trapper on 27/09/2023 - 13:04
                +2

                @frugalftw:

                I guess in my perception it only belongs to me once the money changes hands

                It is not owned by you until money changes hands, but it's still in your lawful possession - by permission of the owner.

                Only someone authorised by the actual owner (a staff member) can withdraw that permission.

                • frugalftw on 27/09/2023 - 13:21

                  @trapper: Thank you. And also for the response below too.

        • kiitos on 27/09/2023 - 08:14
          +3

          It can be tricky at times as the line is not always black and white, and can change depending on other factors like your mood, etc.

          Taking items out of your trolley at a supermarket is crossing the line.

          What about someone pushing your groceries on the conveyer belt with the divider to make more room for their groceries?

          • frugalftw on 27/09/2023 - 09:15
            +1

            @kiitos: Thank you so much for staying on topic!

          • SlartiBartFozz on 27/09/2023 - 22:24
            +1

            @kiitos: I don't have an issue with that — often people take up more space than needed on the conveyor, even when the person behind them is struggling with armfulls of groceries, children, bags, baskets etc. and desperate to put it down. I would never take offence with being asked, but strangers handling my purchases introduces a potential issue with hygiene — nothing could prevent strangers from handling goods when on the store shelf but it still crosses a boundary that will make many people uncomfortable.

  • spackbace on 26/09/2023 - 23:13
    +13

    So, am I right in saying you're a younger female? And you already acknowledged he's an older guy.

    While gender, age and physical size shouldn't frame this story, those elements are kinda telling in this situation

    • frugalftw on 26/09/2023 - 23:38
      -6

      Yet my question remains: who owns the item at the check out?

      • johnno07 on 27/09/2023 - 13:27
        +19

        Transfer of ownership is completely irrelevant in this exchange. Your ability to navigate an out-of-the-ordinary social situation is, on the other hand, quite relevant.

      • idonotknowwhy on 27/09/2023 - 15:12

        Yet my question remains: who owns the item at the check out?

        Once payment has cleared, ownership of the item is transferred to you.

    • CommuterPolluter on 28/09/2023 - 16:41

      From the post history presumably a 40 yo woman or gay man.

  • jolee3 on 26/09/2023 - 23:39
    +9

    The additional information you gave in another comment sounds like it isn't really about the timber…the question really is that another customer was inappropriate during checkout and should the Bunnings staff member have intervened.

    I don't know the answer. If it were me, I'd probably appreciate it, but I don't know that I would necessarily expect it.

    • frugalftw on 27/09/2023 - 00:38
      -3

      It needed to happen from their end, as the store has a certain duty of care. The first thing came to my mind was “I’m not going back to the shop again, it’s not safe.” I’m pretty strong physically, bench press half my body weight. Suffice to say I would not have any issue taking down that man if I had to, but it presented itself as if I was one against the man and the store because they allowed it, they agreed with the conduct, at the minimum. Now that’s a fight I’m not willing to get myself into.

      • Porker on 27/09/2023 - 01:04
        +3

        How are you sure that the store staff saw or knew that you were under duress and ignored it?

        You getting unwanted attention can be unpleasant but it's a but much to blame others when they don't intervene to assist you.

        Even you were unsure what to do at the time and it appears that only upon reflection that you're able to articulate what you expected to happen.

        • frugalftw on 27/09/2023 - 06:37
          -2

          Same as with the other commenter, you don’t have to believe any of if. I’m not here to prove anything.

          When the bystanders did nothing, they became part of the threat. The man started with physical actions, while not directly on me, was enough for anyone commenting so far to be uncomfortable. It doesn’t change anything when you make it out to be about unwanted attention. Fact is he crossed a boundary physically unprovoked, and the cashier did nothing.

          • Porker on 27/09/2023 - 07:08
            +9

            @frugalftw: You're putting accountability of the other customer's action onto Bunnings.

            How old was the cashier? Again, how do you know if they knew you were under duress or not, and chose to ignore it?

            It doesnt sound like you actually informed them you were being harrassed. As example, I see many customers asking other customers if they work in a store based on any number of indicators. The question does not mean the person asking is under duress.

            I'm not saying that what you experienced was acceptable, but accusing a bystander of not intervening to assist in potentially something they had no awareness of is possibly just passing the blame.

            Could you not have said to the cashier - "I don't know that man, he's touching my items and I'm feeling uncomfortable. Are you able to help me?"

            Maybe your intention for asking the questions you did of the cashier was your form of requesting assistance, but based on your original post, it could potentially be interpreted as something else.

            Not everyone speaks the same language to the same understanding.

            If possible, move on. If not, consider what will assist. At best, I would think Bunnings would simply say 'sorry you experienced that, but…. ', and whether or not that resolves things for you is for you to decide.

            • frugalftw on 27/09/2023 - 08:53

              @Porker: I could not have done anything differently, because I would have done it.

              Two days ago I was at the same store buying two board pieces and had them cut to size. A staff member hit on me quite quickly, enough for me to ask him to stop. To which he replied “A boy can dream”.

              (It’s weird when a man in his 50s calls himself a boy, just fyi.)

              That might be what had already put me on edge, and subsequently put this event on Bunnings. The cashier was in his late 20 or early 30s. I could tell he was wishing it wasn’t happening.

              The store manager was very kind and helpful, and unlike what you seem to believe, there was no but. The point of me posting is to figure out what to do next time, not to prosecute Bunnings, and that is how you move on, is it not?

              • Porker on 27/09/2023 - 09:28
                +1

                @frugalftw: My earlier responses were trying to assist by providing perspective of the actual cashier/checkout experience.

                However, it seems that there may be many more layers to that actual experience and/or the reaction behind it - clarification on who owns the product prior to purchase may not in any way clarify the lack of response by the cashier to the other customer's advancement on you, or your other experiences of Bunnings staff making advances on you.

                I'd suggest being clear in your mind which item you're trying to resolve for yourself and then that may assist on reflection and/or seeing what you can do next time.

                I would agree that the staff advancing on you is something for Bunnings management to address.

                • frugalftw on 27/09/2023 - 11:15

                  @Porker: I appreciate your help, but my question has not changed. As titled.

                  The staff thing was not a big deal on its own, could be anyone, and he was not physical. I only thought about it when I was responding to the other comment and realised why I felt like I was against the whole store.

              • S2 on 27/09/2023 - 19:44
                +1

                @frugalftw: This sounds like a terrible experience for you and I think your reaction and concerns are valid.
                The additional context indicates the problem isn't just with them handling your purchase, but the person's behaviour towards you. Sadly, there seems to be a lot of attack on you in these comments too.
                I really commend your patience in replying and do hope you get a positive resolution with Bunnings.
                Your treatment at Bunnings and in some of these comments are not alright.

                • frugalftw on 28/09/2023 - 10:11

                  @S2: Thank you 😊 I don’t have to take them on as an attack because I needn’t to defend myself. I understand these people would have much harder internal lives than you or me lol I only wish they find a way to see it, but each to their own.

                  The store manager called back and said the man had been put on a list because they don’t want him to do it to anyone else; he talked to the cashier at lengths to teach him how to handle the scenario, and he would do a store-wide thing to teach the staff on customer service since I didn’t give up the name of the staff member who hit on me. It’s all very good. Bunnings has stood up to the trial, I’m very glad 😇

          • trapper on 27/09/2023 - 13:20
            +10

            @frugalftw:

            When the bystanders did nothing, they became part of the threat.

            Oh god… and here I was taking you seriously, you're a drama queen.

            • frugalftw on 27/09/2023 - 13:41

              @trapper: So your way of disagreeing is to put a derogatory label on people who holds a different opinion? It takes one to know one.

          • newjerseydamo on 27/09/2023 - 13:32

            @frugalftw: Correction: YOU did nothing.

            You can't make assumptions about other people and wait for them to do something; if you're not happy with the outcome, then you need to be more assertive and take further action, simple.

            People who haven't experienced what you've previously experienced just may not have it occur to them what situation is actually happening in front of them, or they themselves may lack the ability to handle confrontations (speaking about the cashier here).

            Take it as a learning experience on how to better yourself in being more assertive. Next time, make a scene, talk louder, ask for a manager, etc.

          • Mikeer on 27/09/2023 - 14:58

            @frugalftw:

            When the bystanders did nothing, they became part of the threat.

            Is it your expectation that every time someone hits on someone, bystanders should assume by default it's an unwanted interaction, and have a duty to intervene?

            • frugalftw on 28/09/2023 - 10:12

              @Mikeer: It is if the person was in distress. You don’t have to live by this, but I do, even if I really don’t like that person.

              • Mikeer on 28/09/2023 - 10:18

                @frugalftw: What if the person does not communicate outwardly that they are in distress - should we assume by default that they are?

                • frugalftw on 28/09/2023 - 10:20

                  @Mikeer: Why do you assume all communication is verbal? And you are allowed to ask.

      • Hangryuman on 28/09/2023 - 11:00

        'I’m pretty strong physically, bench press half my body weight'

        oh geez - I'm guessing the OP is an Asian male freaked out by the older gay Causian male trying to come on to him.

        Short answer - it's unlikely a gay male will try to rape you at the Bunnings checkout.

  • try2bhelpful on 27/09/2023 - 07:04

    Welcome to the world of women. We have to deal with unwanted attention, guys who think they know better, and much more overt threats than this sort of thing all the time. Even when we try to raise much more relevant issues we are called Karens. The guy was a dick but he, certainly, was no threat to you unless he was preparing to hit you with the bit of wood. If women didn’t go back to places we felt uncomfortable and disrespected in we wouldn’t get out of the house. Shit happens, you get uncomfortable, you deal with the situation to deescalate it and you move on. In an ideal world people seek active consent before they do things. Be glad the situation wasn’t in worse circumstances.

    • spackbace on 27/09/2023 - 11:45
      +15

      It's interesting that when you thought OP was male, you implied they were a Karen, yet now:

      Even when we try to raise much more relevant issues we are called Karens.

      Did OP's gender really sway your perception of the events that quick?

      • try2bhelpful on 27/09/2023 - 19:08
        -3

        If the OP is female then I still think their behaviour is weird. Most women deal with a lot more shit than this. I would be surprised if a female got this upset by the guys behaviour. Apparently it does take all types.

    • [Deactivated] on 27/09/2023 - 19:06
      +6

      Welcome to the world of men where all good intentions are viewed as a precursor to rape by toxic women brainwashed by radical feminists who are miserable and alone with 7 cats. ;-D

      • smartazz104 on 28/09/2023 - 08:29

        Yes I'm sure grandpa had "good intentions". Lucky for him the timber weas the only wood around.

      • Hangryuman on 28/09/2023 - 11:01

        I'm guessing the OP is male

  • tabitha731 on 27/09/2023 - 08:06
    +4

    Get a grip! It's timber!! It's not as if they were handling ur food. If u were independent enuff as a woman enuff u would've assisted the bunning staff to ring thru ur purchase instead of contemplating on trivial BS instead of looking around like a damsel in distress, and for context I am a woman, and have always been fiercely independent that I don't look like a bimbo at the register so that another man has to help.

    • frugalftw on 27/09/2023 - 09:03
      +3

      I don't look like a bimbo at the register so that another man has to help

      Lol there’s too many things wrong with that sentence I’m just gonna drop it.

      • Porker on 27/09/2023 - 09:37

        The reality is you've come to a public forum for assistance and with that comes various comments/responses.

        Attacking someone's grammar and ignoring their message could in someways be no different to questioning if a customer works at the store and having the employee answer the literal question while ignoring the real message/purpose…

        With reference to my earlier reply, I'm suggesting you apply some perspective on the incident and responses and be clear to yourself what you're trying to resolve.

        • frugalftw on 27/09/2023 - 11:11
          +3

          Attacking someone's grammar and ignoring their message

          That was completely not what I was referring to. First of all, the assumption of how I looked and behaved was uncalled for, if not offensive. Second, I don’t behave differently based on other people’s fashion choices, it’s classic victim blaming lol Third, who was forcing the man to help? He has to?

          The only question I’m trying to resolve is if another customer has the right to touch the items I intended to purchase during the check out process. Nothing else was relevant. Because that would have been the point I’d gone done a completely different path.

          • Porker on 27/09/2023 - 11:46

            @frugalftw: On reflection and the narrative of your response, I can see we saw different messages.

            I wasn't intending to directly/indirectly defend the implication of attire assumption, ie. bimbo, or how you were presented, dressed, or other at the time of your experience.

            There's probably no value in trying to further explain why I responded, other than to say the above.

            @John Kimble's response below appropriately (I believe) sums things up which you have already responded to.

            • frugalftw on 27/09/2023 - 11:50

              @Porker: No worries, I know your intentions are well. It’s not an easy task to communicate without seeing a person. Thank you for your responses 😌

          • Hangryuman on 28/09/2023 - 11:04

            @frugalftw: 'The only question I’m trying to resolve is if another customer has the right to touch the items I intended to purchase during the check out process'

            ima say yes - now far cough with your creep/criminal assumptions against a poor old guy simply wanting to help you in a friendly way in a public place fer cry sake

  • John Kimble on 27/09/2023 - 10:13
    +14

    My two cents.

    There are a few issues here.

    1) I think store owns items until you pay for it. However, social etiquette/norms is that another customer does/should not touch items in other people's possession/trolley without the consent of the impending purchaser.

    2) The man who is allegedly either hitting on you or (in his mind) doing something nice (without anyone asking for him to) is a tough one. Yes, the store has a duty of care for you to be safe in their store, but it can be difficult for a "bystander" to judge if you or anyone is unsafe or uncomfortable in any social interaction. On one end, another person might not mind if someone else helped them, on the other end another person might take extreme offence and tell them to piss off. Kind of like when men try and open doors for women I suppose?

    These days it seems you see a lot of examples where people rightly or wrongly won't step in and help someone who may in distress. Each "bystander" has their own reasons I suppose.

    In a weird way you are probably lucky if you are a woman and haven't been hit on enough times to know how to react in such a situation? I would have thought saying "Thank you, but I don't need your help, please my item down" would have made it clear to him to stop and for the cashier to maybe intervene after he called you beautiful, but who knows, maybe it would have escalated the situation and made it worse…🤷🏻‍♂️

    • Porker on 27/09/2023 - 10:32

      My earlier replies were based on the new bits of information provided at each time. If I could re-write everything with the understanding now of OPs plight, it would be this response.

      Well said.

    • frugalftw on 27/09/2023 - 11:33

      Thank you.

      1) is the one I needed perspective on.
      2) is about how I should treat my own customers, if anything. Stores can decide what they want to do with their customers, it’s really their own business. I’d like to conduct in accordance in the best interest of my customers. In that, if another customer is touching someone else’s item, I would interfere from now on.

      It is confusing when it comes to the dance of the genders, because it’s purely based on the perceived attractiveness. I’d say if there’s a huge age gap, it would be a negative reaction. Putting that aside, in this scenario, how was it ever going to be helpful to remove a trolley from someone? They take up a lot of room and really a liability in a lot of ways. Despite that, stores provide them to help customers.

      I welcome help in general, this man however, was not helping me.

      Haha ikr? Most of the time it’s younger men and they do not do stuff like this. Some times a stalker in the gym, random people calling up pretending to be a client, etc. They don’t cross the line physically. This is the furthest I’d experienced.

      • Wayne7497 on 27/09/2023 - 23:14
        +1

        What line exactly did he cross ? Older generation people do n say lots of things young people may in these days find inappropriate however its simply a generational gap, ive been called love, sweetie, good lookin , had older people help me where i didnt need it, but i dont take offence and if i dont need help, its simply. " thanks for the offer im ok " 99% nod in appreciation and walk away.

        Cannot for the life of me see how people convince themselves that its all sinister and there is an alternative agenda.

        And one of the reasons i no longer offer assistance or advice in anyway to younger ppl, because of the above even when they ask.

        • frugalftw on 28/09/2023 - 10:34

          Well, if you don’t see him crossing any lines, think about this: do unto others as they would have them do unto them. It would get yourself out of doing things to satisfy your needs and into doing things to satisfy other’s needs. It requires you to accept that we have an inherent need to help others and contribute. So when you do thing for others to help them, you are actually trying to help yourself. In the case when the other party happen to want the help, you have a win-win interaction.

          Bottom line is: if you think someone needs help, unless it’s time-critical, ask and offer it.

          • Hangryuman on 28/09/2023 - 11:14

            @frugalftw: Jesus far king cry sst - you have a problem with interpreting others' behaviour.

            A one-off unique interaction with a stranger who said they wanted to help you 'because you are beautiful' - and you want to turn it into a high court case ?

            Here's a story - the other day in Sydney Pitt St Mall I was sitting on a bench amongst the crowds, when an attractive young female dressed smartly appeared holding above her head 'LOOKING FOR A HUSBAND' - wait - here's a pic - https://photos.app.goo.gl/JtGxxxpzC44qeCCF6

            I thought about it for a moment and figured it was some sort of stunt - then noticed a guy with a big camera standing off to the side recording people's reactions - and went okay it's for a YouTube stunt or such.

            Anyhoo - lots of people started reacting - mostly women - and I noticed a couple of young teenage girls see the woman and go OMG - one went 'I have to photograph this !!!' and ran over near me to get a shot. I stepped over and tapped the girl on the arm and said 'did you see the camera ? They're recording this'

            In other words - if you believe the first impression - OMG HOW CAN THAT HAPPEN !?!?!? Once you look closer - meh - nothing to see here …

          • Wayne7497 on 28/09/2023 - 15:27

            @frugalftw: With a reply like yours i rest my case.

  • Aussie Paul 58 on 27/09/2023 - 10:36
    +2

    When I'm in Bunnings sometimes, I'm still deciding what to buy.
    Sometimes there is low stock of the item I want.
    What I do is, I will hold the item I'm considering while I make my decision.
    (In my trolly is also "holding" )
    Sometimes it involves more than one item.
    Sometimes in different asiles.
    If I buy THIS one then do I get THIS one or THAT one.
    My personal sense is if I'm in possession of the item even though I have not paid for it yet, its mine to complete the transaction if I choose to.
    If I want to release it to others, I put it back on the shelf.

    I'm a 65 yr old male, and I can't believe that guy saying that.
    I can understand you being upset by it.
    There is a bigger issue there than the guy picking up your items and putting your trolley away, although that in itself is not insignifigant.
    I'm glad Bunnings seems to be taking it seriously.

    • frugalftw on 27/09/2023 - 11:45
      +1

      Thank you, that clarifies it.

      There are plenty of good men in Bunnings, I’ve talked to quite a few and they were always very helpful. I tend to talk to men who are older in general to try to avoid this kind of situation, but QLD is full of older people who don’t see the line. I had been offered $100 in the past from my then landlord (68 yo) to do stuff lol I mean, I don’t take offence, you had to try as a man I guess… It’s just another piece of material for my eventual traumedy lol

      • Hangryuman on 28/09/2023 - 11:18

        'QLD is full of older people who don’t see the line'

        I grew up in QLD - different from NSW or VIC, people in QLD tend to talk to strangers - maybe something to do with lower population, hotter, more outdoor lifestyle

        so if you freak out like a precious snowflake when a stranger talks to you, perhaps move south to get away from that horror … ;-)

        • frugalftw on 28/09/2023 - 12:02
          -1

          Lol I talk to strangers plenty, but I don’t find younger men as tenants and offer them money for special services, and on a senior rate too, I might add 😂 Sounds like you are still in that classic “boys will be boys” school. You might want to move to a different state and get a feeling of what it’s like when people treat you right, instead of justifying and internalising your bad experiences and turning into the perpetrator yourself.

    • trapper on 27/09/2023 - 13:15
      +1

      My personal sense is if I'm in possession of the item even though I have not paid for it yet, its mine to complete the transaction if I choose to.
      If I want to release it to others, I put it back on the shelf.

      This is correct and this is how a store works. You are permitted by the store owner to be in temporary possession of items that are for sale while inside the store.

  • [Deactivated] on 27/09/2023 - 11:20

    As a bloke I would say he was a creepy old man, he had no business touching your stuff or trolley, if it happens again be more assertive.
    Tell him to leave your stuff and trolley alone, ask the cashier to do the same & if necessary ask for the manager.
    If he starts with unwanted comments and gets into your personal space a knee to the balls should convince him to (profanity) off.

    • try2bhelpful on 27/09/2023 - 11:24
      +1

      Yeah, escalating the situation is going to work well. Then the OP will be up on assault and he won’t need to worry about boycotting Bunnings because he won’t be allowed in.

  • ozboygsl on 27/09/2023 - 11:29
    +1

    and you just stood there and did nothing??????

  • BargainEnjoyer2022 on 27/09/2023 - 11:58
    +1

    i wouldn't want some random customer dictating how much i should be paying for my timber or taking my trolley away. and it seems like there was an undertone of "oh this poor helpless woman, she clearly needs a man to help her".

    • frugalftw on 27/09/2023 - 13:19

      Yes. It was very obvious, but why would you take away the trolley that was helping me more than you ever did lol Anyhow, that’s beside the point, just another person on an off day (so I hope).

  • B00stJuice on 27/09/2023 - 11:58
    -2

    Perhaps you should have offered the cashier assistance rather than letting the random good samaritan do it.

  • MITM on 27/09/2023 - 12:47
    +12

    I'd say the guy is trying to be gallant from a bygone era to assist a young lady - a bit like opening the door for a female. He then continued his gallantry putting the trolley away because he was now on a mission to assist. Should have been put in his place in the very first instance, immediately but politely. "I can take care of myself thank you."
    In fact, I wish some people would give me more distance in queues.

    • capslock janitor on 27/09/2023 - 21:17
      +1

      eloquently expressed

    • Hangryuman on 28/09/2023 - 11:21

      I'm thinking the OP is a young Asian male virgin - so of yet undetermined sexuality - freaking out at the approach of an apparent gay male

  • pformag on 27/09/2023 - 12:56

    So you said nothing to the guy touching your wood? Speak up for yourself.

    All you have to say is

    "Hay mate, all good? Do you need help?"

  • StingyLizzy on 27/09/2023 - 13:31
    +1

    What did I just read???!!

  • j4ck on 27/09/2023 - 14:02
    +2

    I have absolutely no idea what's going on.

    • USER DC on 28/09/2023 - 01:22
      +1

      exactly, OP provided so little information, the only I can understand from it is that someone in Bunnings (a non-employee) did something to an item in OP's trolley "mid-transaction" while he way waiting at cashier (even then waiting where ? like about to give cash/tap card or waiting in Line, Did cashier already scan his items in their system)??.

      And who knows what else

  • pufffdragon on 27/09/2023 - 14:13
    -8

    The guy that helped while you stood by deserves a medal. You, on the other hand deserve all the backlash that's dished out to you, to be honest.

    • [Deactivated] on 27/09/2023 - 14:30
      +5

      Not so, the guy didn't help at all, she had a trolley for the wood & the interferring (profanity) took it away & made her carry it.
      I'm guessing that you're that old man.

    • smartazz104 on 28/09/2023 - 08:30
      +1

      Your comment is useless drivel, to be honest.

  • xrayed giraffe on 27/09/2023 - 14:53
    +5

    Aaaah Schroedinger's timber.
    It is both owned by you and the store simultaneously.

    • frugalftw on 27/09/2023 - 16:31
      -1

      Hahaha that is gold 😂

    • [Deactivated] on 27/09/2023 - 19:29
      -6

      The only cats harmed in this story were the 7 owned by the miserable 40+ year old feminist who spent her life brainwashing women into man-haters who will sit in a comfy chair inhaling chocolates in her pink Madonna puzzy hat until she dies alone and is eaten by said cats.

      • smartazz104 on 28/09/2023 - 08:30

        Care to share what's made you so bitter?

  • Willy Beamish on 27/09/2023 - 15:22
    -3

    You don't own it until you pay for it and complete the transaction.

    Clearly you weren't doing your job if another customer had to step in to help the cashier out while you were in PTSD flashback mode while someone else touched the product you were planning to buy.

  • Deals For Days on 27/09/2023 - 15:43
    +2

    “Thanks mate, I’m okay” would go a long way.

    Obviously bloke was being a bit weird/trying some ‘chivalry’ thing out. Pretty harmless but same as you I would be uncomfortable in the moment. When you asked if he worked there that was his queue to back off and he didn’t.

    In your position I probably would have just put the timber down and got the trolley after he handed it to me lol.

  • 51ngh on 27/09/2023 - 19:10

    Even though I have posted this here, I ask that you not read my post.

    • [Deactivated] on 27/09/2023 - 19:31

      Ok. Ooops.

  • lordezekiel on 27/09/2023 - 19:44
    +2

    TLDR: A customer fondled my hardwood without permission.

    • Hangryuman on 28/09/2023 - 11:23
      +1

      until he found it was softwood and walked away unsatisfied

  • BartholemewH on 27/09/2023 - 20:32
    +2

    A simple "You right there champ?" would have nipped this in the bud. If the helper responds in a negative fashion, it's time to punch on in the carpark.

  • Motek Benzona on 27/09/2023 - 20:58

    *this thread was brought to you by crazy cat lady monthly.

  • capslock janitor on 27/09/2023 - 21:13

    (Dude in his 70s, probably has a few generations of grandchildren… )

    (It’s weird when a man in his 50s calls himself a boy, just fyi.)

    u sound like a material gworl by your commentary.

    • frugalftw on 28/09/2023 - 11:39
      -2

      I don’t like coriander, it’s an evil plant and I don’t consider it food. Are you ok with that commentary because you don’t identify with coriander? I quite appreciate men who are older as good friends, they have a lot to offer. I prefer to be with someone who are statistically likely to be around me for longer. Do you not? I don’t see a lot of women with younger men, that’s kinda telling, is it not?

  • jonathonsunshine on 27/09/2023 - 21:42

    Were you buying the classic American 2x4 / 2 by 4 ? Issue could have been resolved very quickly.

  • Wayne7497 on 27/09/2023 - 23:04
    +1

    I seriously dont believe how upset people can get these days over little things.

  • USER DC on 28/09/2023 - 01:13
    1. your context is not easy to understand
    2. Before you get to own it (and keep owning it), you must have possession of it.
      By the uncomplete information/not easy to understand context you gave and "Mid-transaction", seems like that
      you didn't actually had possession of item (not a continued possession at least before leaving merchant after getting a good title to it).
      So just this alone is enough to say you may not be entitled to that item if e.g. that other person fiddling with your items took it to another cashier and paid for it and took it with him/her. (you may get a refund instead of that item, regardless of whatever you or someone else says on if you own the item or not, bottom line is if you leave item unpossessed someone else can take it).
    • frugalftw on 28/09/2023 - 11:51
      -2

      1. Sorry I was trying to compensate for something. I have realised people tend to pick up the issues they want to solve and run with it. Half of the time when I asked a specific question, I got generic answers and a ton of noise. Not that I’m complaining, quite appreciative the participation, just can get rather distracting at times.

      2. Thank you. From all the responses so far, it does seem like while I might not legally own it, but it’s considered mine once it’s in my trolley, until I unload it. Oh that’s why he took the trolley away 🤣 He knows how to work the system 😂😂😂

  • YoursTruly on 28/09/2023 - 04:15
    +1

    My 3 cents:

    According to OP, the man may be in his 60’s/70’s - thus most likely & typically an ‘old school’ person in mannerism, logic, outlook and behaviour.

    From experience interacting with many ‘old school’ persons, that’s what men of that generation typically did around the opposite ‘fairer & softer’ sex who seemed like they would appreciate to be ‘helped’ as a show courtesy (as the opposite ‘fairer & softer’ sex - in their mind - apparently appreciated such ‘helpful’ strong gentlemanly gestures.)

    The man probably thought to himself : “damn that’s a lot of heavy timber stuff and she’s all alone…I’ll ‘help’ her carry that stuff!”

    The OP likely freaked out from the unexpected attention - especially from an ‘old school’ man older than her.

  • THICKnSLOW on 28/09/2023 - 08:13
    +1

    Did you use a bulk size trolley to carry a few pieces of hand carry sized wood, that would make sense that he unloaded it for you to save you the trouble of leaving the trolley half blocking a carpark space.

  • TRANCE on 28/09/2023 - 10:07
    +1

    I hope I never have to meet or talk to you.

  • Hangryuman on 28/09/2023 - 10:37
    +1

    'another customer started handling my timber to help out'

    and … ? You want to turn human kindness into a cause for complaint … ? Wow.

  • ShanghaiRocks on 28/09/2023 - 11:18
    +2

    I feel you, OP. I'd be upset as well if someone touched my wood without my consent !!

    • Hangryuman on 28/09/2023 - 11:24

      but if you already had wood, I'd guess you'd be ready for someone to touch it ?

    • YoursTruly on 28/09/2023 - 13:31

      seems OP is female and the other customer handling the said ‘wood’ is male

      Either way reads to me he was being helpful

      • Protractor on 11/10/2023 - 13:33

        That's not allowed anymore, #metoo banned it.

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