Failing My Mechanical Engineering Degree

Fireblade RR-R SP on 05/11/2025 - 00:03
Last edited 10/11/2025 - 09:59

Hey everyone,

I am a 3rd year mechanical engineering student, and I am failing miserably at every possible thing at my disposal. I am failing my degree, I failed 3 subjects last semester, and now probably failing 2 more this semester. I have had to take time off work 3 times this year due to physical injuries, and all my leave is gone. My mental health is declining. I have always had trouble focusing, but this year and last year were terrible as there is quite a significant amount of content to be covered in great depth, and I decided to get a referral to a psychologist who mock-screened me for ADHD, and my symptoms are quite high. I know it's probably one of the most misdiagnosed disorders, but I think that explains it. I feel like everything is piling up, and I am going nowhere. My parents are quite supportive and have no specific expectations of me except that I succeed in whatever I want to do, which is quite a luxury, but even that seems like a reach now.

I am 22, and I feel like I have achieved nothing in the past 4 years of my adult life. I have managed to save 10k even with my bad spending habits, but it's nothing, especially when I look at what I have spent my income on. I have always enjoyed machinery such as bikes and cars or anything with an engine, but it's slowly withering away from me. I don't feel like doing anything anymore. Everything I enjoyed, photography, collecting watches, cycling, and riding motorcycles, everything just sits and collects dust. I wanted to do well and retire my parents, but I am not sure if I am capable anymore. I am gonna take a break next semester to get myself together, and I am gonna probably gonna seriously lower my screentime, and work a ton to save money. What should I do? I am so lost.

thanks for reading

EDIT :

Hey everyone,

->I really appreciate the fantastic advice and perspective provided through the comments. As some of you have mentioned, getting a job and working through a break from uni. I do plan to do that, but my options are limited due to the nature of my injuries(disc bulge lower back, sciatica, and lateral epicondylitis in both elbows). I am currently recovering, so I have taken time off work. I am actually taking a trip to visit my grandma overseas and plan to rent a bike and do some riding there.

-> I am considering my options as I have 4 months until next semester starts, and I am going to see if I am ready by trying to tackle some engineering projects during the time off at my own pace. I am going to make some lifestyle changes, such as eating healthy, lowering my screentime, and getting out of the house more.

-> I am gonna save up some money before getting my actual diagnosis, as it is quite expensive and I do not want to dig into my savings too much. I have listed half of my belongings that I was not using to get some cash.

-> I do not intend to drop the degree as I have already invested quite a bit of time and money into it, so I will be finishing it, but I am gonna take the advice to lower the workload and look for potential internships, as I do have my associate's degree in engineering already.

-> I do not use any social media as I deleted them a couple of years ago due to excessive screentime, and I did not see them being useful to me. I still use streaming services, which is the major contribution to my screen time, other than my engineering software(CAD, Ansys, ABAQUS, and Siemens), so I plan to decrease that.

Overall, my main focus is my mental and physical well-being at the moment, so I intend to prioritize that as suggested in this forum. Thank you very much again. All the advice and well-wishes mean a lot.

Education & Work

Comments

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  • urahara on 05/11/2025 - 00:16
    +53

    Rome wasn't built in a day. You are young. Important part is learning, progressing and hustling everyday. Just seems like a burnout to me or maybe you are comparing yourself too much with others.

      • EightImmortals on 05/11/2025 - 07:53
        +13

        42 days, sheesh, everyone knows that.

      • Nillionaire on 05/11/2025 - 09:47
        +5

        You can take a flight to Rome and investigate it yourself..

        • jv on 05/11/2025 - 09:49
          -3

          That won't help.

          • Poor Ass on 06/11/2025 - 20:52
            +1

            @jv: Hot air balloon JV style

            • jv on 06/11/2025 - 21:34
              -1

              @Poor Ass: In 80 days.

              • Poor Ass on 06/11/2025 - 21:58

                @jv: Less if going to Rome.. maybe 30 days drifting in the right direction

            • slipstreamexpress on 09/11/2025 - 07:11

              @Poor Ass: Might I recommend a submersible then JV, possibly something built by oceangate?

          • smartazz104 on 07/11/2025 - 08:17

            @jv: You might be beyond help then.

        • ihbh on 05/11/2025 - 09:52
          +3

          You can take a flight to Rome and investigate it yourself..

          No, when in Rome, … do as the Romans do

          • Poor Ass on 06/11/2025 - 21:59

            @ihbh: Like everyone pooping together and have meetings in the bathroom

          • serpserpserp on 07/11/2025 - 21:52

            @ihbh: Yes, fly a hot air balloon

      • Muppet Detector on 05/11/2025 - 13:35

        How long did it take then?

        How long would it take now?

  • try2bhelpful on 05/11/2025 - 00:19
    +25

    We can all get a bit lost at times. I finished my first degree because I’d started it but the only work I ever did in the field I could’ve got with my HSC results. My second degree got me the good job. I would keep seeing the psychologist to get a confirmed diagnosis and, hopefully, a treatment plan. Talk to someone at the University to see what you can do about putting the degree on ice for now and if they have counseling services.

    Best of luck with getting the support you need.

      • try2bhelpful on 05/11/2025 - 00:37
        +45

        This really isn’t the forum for your flippancy.

        • JIMB0 on 05/11/2025 - 06:03
          +1

          He's just a da/dt

        • Crow K on 05/11/2025 - 10:42
          +1

          You say that, but jv's comment total went up (which is the entire purpose of the exercise)

  • freefall101 on 05/11/2025 - 00:26
    +31

    Just wanna start with, I was you 20 years ago. The one piece of advice I took at the time? Finish the degree. I focused hard as I could my 4th year and just got it done. At the same time, I fully intended to not follow through on that degree or get a job in it. I did though, because my focus was back on it. Mood and focus swings.

    The old man advice will always be this isn’t the end of the world, because it really isn’t. The focus is that if you get that bit of paper, no one can ever take that away from you. So just do that one thing.

    Everything I enjoyed, photography, collecting watches, cycling, and riding motorcycles, everything just sits and collects dust.

    You have a collection of interests that are generic ADHD dopamine hits. Which is fine, but it means you’ll have to push yourself to get back on the bike and you’ll enjoy it when you’re on it. But outgrowing hobbies is totally normal. I’ve had a dozen cameras over my life I gave up on. Motorbikes everyone I know rode them for a few years then it lost a bit of the dopamine hit and the risks hit home. Also sounds like depression, I have it, not getting chemical rewards is basically what depression is.

    I’d keep following up with doctors. Avoid self diagnosing too, because it becomes a crutch. Even if you know the cause, the solution is still to push yourself and the ebbs and flows will change over time, it doesn’t define you.

    • OG Puppy Banana on 07/11/2025 - 09:28
      +2

      Great advice.

      Make sure you do what you need to do to just get the degree done. Talk to your uni's progression and special consideration team to help you defer some time to manage your own academic progress, and perhaps even go PT to get back on track.

      If you tell them you have support of your treating psych, your parents and the commitment to complete your degree, you'll be in a much better position than if you have to front a academic progress committee and leave it in their hands.

      Good luck!

  • jv on 05/11/2025 - 00:35
    +27

    Take a break and get your head and priorities sorted out and come back when you're ready… You're only 22…………….

  • Hydralyte on 05/11/2025 - 00:59
    +4

    I've seen many a student go through engineering degrees with no passion and for what comes after in the workforce. Finding a job becomes hard when you have no real passion for learning new skills in engineering. If you truly want to finish it, take a break for a year or do part-time, study the subjects by yourself with online courses and textbooks or even a tutor, then return with a fresh perspective. Most of the mechanical engineering subjects are not HARD per se to pass. They just require a buttload of practice and a good teacher. The design courses and research modules are where you can separate a good engineer from one who is just there to pass a course.

    See if you can get an internship or work experience in the field. A lot of mechanical engineers realise that sometimes you may not land a job where you are sitting on CAD software 5 days a week. A lot of it is testing, tooling, 3D printing work, writing reports, and other boring documentation like manuals, requirements, risk matrices, and power point presentations.

    I remember failing an engineering subject once and looking back, it was an optional elective but the lecturer was a complete tosser. Absolutely awful teacher. When I studied it with my friends and online videos, it became so much more interesting and clearer. Some lecturers just make things hard for the sake of dragging everyone's marks down. Making the course effing hard doesn't make us better engineers. Most of the hard core low level content isn't even used in practice because computational software exists.

    I am guessing you failed Solid Mechanics 2 and Control Systems.
    Honestly, those two subjects just need you to sit with the textbook and some online videos for hours a day.

    I also suggest you look at job descriptions these days. No one hires a bare bones mechanical engineer anymore. The job titles are so specific that you feel like telling these hiring managers to go get stuffed and stop creating jobs for 1% of the eng population.

    I am not a mechanical engineer but I have done a few mech courses.

    • crentist on 05/11/2025 - 13:54
      +4

      I am guessing you failed Solid Mechanics 2 and Control Systems.

      Haha among the likely culprits.
      My lecturer for Engineering Dynamics asked a large hall of students to put their hand up if they were repeating the subject. About one quarter of the room raised their hands, myself included.

      Second time around I put in more consistent effort from the beginning instead of trying to catch up at the end, and it was a very different experience. Really enjoyed the subject, where it had me questioning my entire degree before.

  • MrFrugalSpend on 05/11/2025 - 03:58
    +13

    Some insights I hope helps…

    • More of my colleagues and friends changed degrees and did not finish what they first started (than those that continued on the same path); This happens, a lot.
      I too changed, twice but ended up finishing strong with good results (For many it was different types of engineering (e.g. mechatronics to electrical), for some it was out of engineering (aeronautical into law)).
    • The workplace is your best driver of experience and opportunities arising that determine career paths - uni is not everything. I changed my uni completely to align with the field I got a job in, and once that happened everything became much easier as what I was learning was immediately applied and made sense to my job I was an assistant at.
    • Of those that finished, many worked in different specialties/fields than they expected (e.g. civil engineers with interest in geotech ended up doing traffic modelling - A lot of mechanical engineers in practice have nothing to do with engines (which are also disappearing in favour of electrical motors obviously) - many design HVAC systems for buildings - it's where the work is and with learning on the job and software is manageable, but will you find a career about high COP HVAC equipment specs, future of refrigerant, NABERS and control systems rewarding?).
    • Of those that stayed on it, some took 10 years to complete it - but learned to enjoy the journey, met their partners at uni, and are now successful in careers. When you get older, you get a different perspective on time - 10 years goes in a flash post-uni. 4 years you feel like is wasted may seem like a lot - but it isn't. You are young and you've earned life experience at uni whether you realise it or not.
    • Engineering can be hard - most of my friends are engineers and their uni was harder than most others I know outside of engineering, and most engineering students couldn't hold down even casual work at the same time. Some others could (E.g. business).
      … So don't be afraid to change if you need to (and if you do, also consider engineering pays okay, but not as well as many people think unless you are in a manager / Project management role (like any business) - if you are handy and have half a brain, you can earn more going doing an apprenticeship becoming an electrician / dual trade fridgy…).
    • I found on campus full time is best rather than distant education to keep you on track with peers and regular scheduling - but everyone is different. Hyperfocusing in silence to avoid distractions with a Pomodoro timer may be better for you.
    • Some of the most successful ones are neuro divergent, it can come with the territory of intelligence along with the ups and downs in performance. You need to be able to accept that is okay, don't beat yourself up about it. There are workplaces out there that will be a fit.
    • Schedule - you are allowed study/work time and you are allowed down time / social / hobby times - you need both to thrive. Don't put off the latter because you are always consumed what you haven't done in the former. That leads to this burn out. If you set reachable / small goals for your allotted time, then allow breaks, it all adds up.

    Don't give up on you - keep at it, work out what works for you, look out for workplace opportunities that are stepping stones to rewarding career paths, and it will all work out eventually. I've seen it from people where you are now.

    Hope that helps.

  • garetz on 05/11/2025 - 06:21
    +6

    You are putting alot of pressure on yourself, sounds like you are spiraling, maybe mechanical engineering is not for you. Whatever field you choose to study is much easier to get a handle on when you are enjoying what you are learning.

  • JIMB0 on 05/11/2025 - 08:17
    +9

    It's a tough degree with lots of content. You really have to work hard to keep up with it as it's easy to fall behind. Can you reduce your study load? Take 2 units for a while and have a breather.

  • EFC94 on 05/11/2025 - 08:40
    +17

    One of the best things I ever did at uni was drop to 2 or 3 subjects a semester. Yes it will take you a little longer to finish the degree, but you'd be amazed how much easier it makes university. Doing 4 subjects a semester I didn't feel was manageable for myself, 2 is a breeze and 3 requires me to have some time management skills.

    • crentist on 05/11/2025 - 11:31
      +1

      Seconding this. I failed a few subjects in a dual engineering/arts degree and was hating the engineering. Dual degree usually means a long course with some overloaded semesters, so repeating subjects meant one extra semester with slight overloading.
      But when I started planning out the next few years, I worked out that allowing a second extra semester would shift that to a slight underload, total 3-4 subjects per semester, and almost all would be limited to 2 engineering subjects.

      It was such a good move. Uni became a lot more fun, which made me want to spend more time doing it. Every semester I had 2 tough subjects to focus on and a couple extra that I could just enjoy.
      Not only did the extra breathing room improve my marks and my sanity, it made me really enjoy engineering again. It stopped being a tough thing I had to endure, and went back to being something that I enjoyed learning and could do pretty well at. One of those failed subjects even ended up becoming my favourite of the entire course, and something that I still think back on as an example of why I chose engineering in the first place.

      • serpserpserp on 07/11/2025 - 21:57

        Good advice. Taking an extra year to finish is nothing in the grand scheme of things

    • MrFrugalSpend on 05/11/2025 - 18:06

      Agree - I did this and got some balance with work for experience and money, and social - it was a great idea

    • S Baldrick on 06/11/2025 - 19:25
      +1

      I also did this - best decision of my uni life. I was at risk of failing, and after talking to a course advisor I dropped down to 2 or 3 subjects for the remainder of my degree (CS). It did wonders for my mental health, and significantly reduced the burnout.

    • JumpingUnicorns on 07/11/2025 - 14:50
      +1

      Same! Failed my first 2 years, went down to 2-3 subjects a semester and got the hang of it. Started doing summer courses and my final year I did 5 subjects a semester to finish it off.

      Enjoyed my life wayyyy too much on College in my first 3 years lol. Wouldn't change a thing.

      OP, live a little now. Once you get older you can't get some of the experiences you can ring now

  • ihbh on 05/11/2025 - 08:58
    +5

    I wanted to do well and retire my parents

    Please drop this goal. You don't need the added pressure. Parents can look after themselves. They also need to live within their means, develop themselves, etc.

    When you have the resources later on in life, you could set up a scholarship, help the homeless, etc.

  • wallet72 on 05/11/2025 - 09:03
    +1

    if it's possible, maybe change to part time study for a while?

  • witheredcouch on 05/11/2025 - 10:12
    +1

    As someone with trouble focusing I scraped through a regular Uni degree, feeling stressed and overwhelmed the whole time. For my second degree (Law) I was at VU which is Block Model, and working full time as well. The 1 unit at a time fast paced nature of the degree as well as the full time work meant I had zero time to put things off or overthink, and instead just got everything done because I had to. Sounds like a block style model could work well for you.

    The other consideration is the area of study. I'd say about only a third of my friendship group are still doing what their first degree was focused on, with most of them going in very different directions in their mid to late 20's. You are 22, almost nobody has it figured out at that stage. I'd say it's impressive that you have managed to save 10k.

  • wannagrababargain on 05/11/2025 - 10:52
    +4

    The 3rd year of Engineering can make or break you. It's a leap from the first two years which are more foundational and generic in nature. I suggest finishing the degree and sacrifice what is needed to do that, even if it means less hours at your job and less income. Taking a break and coming back later to repeat some subjects might be a good way forward to gain some maturity and focus.

    "failing miserably at every possible thing" is an example of catastrophic thinking which is one of the 'distortions' they teach you about in certain therapies.

    If can be refreshing to simplify your life and 'reset'. If your toys no longer give you pleasure, sell them. Engaging in the selling process will give you something to focus on during your break and bring more cash into your savings.

  • Caped Baldy on 05/11/2025 - 11:08

    Here's a quote from my uni days, "a good engineer finishes a 4 year degree in 5 years". Don't stress too much but I'd recommend you look at student support services.

    There is quite a high co-morbidity between ADHD and depression btw… It's not wrong to feel these ways but is your responsibility to manage including looking after yourself and giving yourself a break.

  • Drakesy on 05/11/2025 - 12:03

    I had a rough time when i did my engineering degree + science degree.

    At the time i made sure to balance my social life and academic life. There were people that would 100% just go and study and not interact with anyone, they burnt out.

    Passes, credits all get degrees as well.

    10 years later after graduating i don't regret it, at the time it was rough but the pay makes me think it was all worthwhile.

  • crentist on 05/11/2025 - 12:07
    +1

    I am 22, and I feel like I have achieved nothing in the past 4 years of my adult life.

    Same as any 22 year old, but it sounds like you're in a bad place mentally.

    I am gonna take a break next semester to get myself together, and I am gonna probably gonna seriously lower my screentime, and work a ton to save money.

    You don't need to go fully off uni and fully onto work. You're putting too much pressure on yourself to be doing a lot at any time, but you don't need to fully justify your current state of being.
    I think you might be better off doing a half-load at uni, and keeping your current workload, maybe even reduce that.
    Let your break be the freedom you create when you give yourself permission to do less.

    If you're failing half your subjects anyway, the outcome will only be an improvement. And it will give you an opportunity to comfortably handle, even enjoy some engineering subjects. Get some wins on the board. You should be choosing engineering, not enduring it.
    It won't do much for your motivation to burn yourself out working for a few months while dreading a return to uni, and then go straight back to burnout study mode and risk failing again.

    • Drakesy on 10/11/2025 - 12:06

      I think you might be better off doing a half-load at uni, and keeping your current workload, maybe even reduce that.

      This is the way. i didn't realise everyone was underloading by the third year until i said i was dropping back from 4 to 3 units.
      The transformation was insane.

  • Muppet Detector on 05/11/2025 - 12:17

    OP, slightly off topic, but something which may help to address any fees payable for the subjects which you didn't pass…

    Talk to uni support and your GP, if there were valid reasons (such as poor mental health?) to explain your struggles, there should be a way to ask that the fees for those subjects be withdrawn or refunded.

    May even be able to get any evidence expunged from your transcript so that it and your GPA aren't negatively affected.

    As for advice, engineering is a damn tough degree for anybody, just keep in touch with those that can support you (your parents? GP?) and you will get through this just fine.

    Best wishes.

  • BuyoTheCat on 05/11/2025 - 12:28

    You chose a Honda over a Ducati so you can make good choices.

    I think you should try connecting with your classmates. I am sure there are a few who are feeling the same.
    If I were in uni now, I would start a club for people who are in your position now to help one another out.

    Sorry I do not have any good advice.

  • ozfool on 05/11/2025 - 12:41

    Go part time at uni so you have enough breathing space to do your classes well. Engineering is a slog, it's easy to get burnt out, I sympathise. Obviously cut down on screen time and go to every lecture and class, continue working your casual job and not just have a holiday. But try not to compare yourself to other people, your 20s are for figuring out what works for you, not everyone launches a high-power career at 23yo.

  • Muppet Detector on 05/11/2025 - 12:52
    +1

    OP, do you even like the degree that you're studying?

    Hard to do something well that you're not enjoying or is turning out to be different to what you thought it would be.

  • brad1-8tsi on 05/11/2025 - 15:05
    +3

    It took me 10 years to finish my 4 year part-time Mech Eng Associate Diploma. Sometimes I took whole years off to concentrate on working & all the other intrusions of life. I won't claim to be ADHD but there are only so many tasks I can take on before there's a trail of chaos and abandoned projects following in my wake.

    Maybe rather than take on 2-3 subjects and be worried about racking up more debt & more Fs, take that break for a semester and then ease back in with 1 subject.

    Get a job that suits your skills. Maybe something practical in construction or something engineering based (assuming you still like engineering).

    I'd also recommend exercise, getting out in nature and any hobbies you had, doing a big tidy-up. I culled my watch collection from 10+ down to a $30 beater & two sentimental pieces (Dad's watch and the watch M&D bought me in 1975).

    Simplify your life.

  • psdillon on 05/11/2025 - 19:07

    There's a lot of good treatments available for ADHD. Your GP can help with that. Also google, youtube and ChatGPT.

    If I was young and in your position, and if I could afford to, I'd defer uni and offer to work for free for 6 months at a business doing something I really enjoy and am naturally good at. Better than a holiday and you'll get some new skills, friends, satisfaction and perspective.

    • InfiniteWee on 07/11/2025 - 16:05

      Can we please not normalise consulting ChatGPT for anything even remotely medical

      • psdillon on 08/11/2025 - 19:02

        I've used it quite a lot for medical questions, and cross checked it carefully, and it's surprisingly accurate up to the point where it offers to draw a graph/diagram. It's handy for getting your head around medical concepts before you dive into the proper literature.

  • ssfps on 06/11/2025 - 19:11
    +1

    There are a few degrees out there that are a lark, but most people can't handle a full time STEM degree and full time work, it's just too much work. All the people I knew that tried to cram before mid-sem assessments or finals exams got through first year fine then started bombing out in second year.
    Personally I cut down to part-time study and part-time work when I hit third year subjects - still spending maybe 60 hours a week between them, much more sustainable than 80+.

  • movieman on 06/11/2025 - 19:15

    YOLO.

    Getting back on the bike to clear your head can help, if you're able to push through…

    Where are you based? DM me. Happy to go riding with you one day if we can make it work.

  • bex000 on 06/11/2025 - 19:41

    If you want to keep studying this subject, I suggest you slow down to 1 or 2 subjects, concentrate on those and pass. Studying what you are passionate about helps. So try to find what that is. You've got time in your side. Just don't take forever.

  • mrvaluepack on 06/11/2025 - 19:58
    +3

    quit mech eng while you can, there are hardly any jobs in australia for mech eng. get a civil or elec eng instead.

  • yesApplez on 06/11/2025 - 21:41
    +1

    I had a similar experience with uni, I would say take a gap year to reset then go back to finish.

    After second year engineering I took a year off then came back and changed majors, then covid happened and I hated doing online. I pushed for a year but failed quite a few subjects and decided to drop out.

    A couple years later I decided to go back and finish the degree (with the original major). All of my subjects still counted so I only needed to finish year 3 and 4. Even though getting a bit older and having some more perspective I still found it an absolute slog and did not enjoy most of it (some was good). But I am glad it’s done now, and working in the industry I find I do actually like the work, whereas uni was making me second guess whether I actually liked engineering or not!

  • whatthecrappin on 06/11/2025 - 21:46

    go part time? sounds like you're overloaded. I was the same with engineering - changed courses - decided I didnt want to be an engineer. I'm now in a different industry, but still dable in the engineering stuff as a hobby. I dont regret it, so hopefully you decide what your prorities are.

  • Munki on 06/11/2025 - 22:27
    +1

    On the plus side, just be thankful you're not doing Electrical Engineering…

  • Name on 06/11/2025 - 22:46

    am 22, and I feel like I have achieved nothing in the past 4 years of my adult life. I have managed to save 10k

    Stop comparing yourself to others. I didn't complete my degree until I was 30. I injured my back at 20, was single, unemployed, broke and moved back in with my parents until 24.

    So.. Saving up 10k and 3/4 way through degree by 22 is a lot better position than I was at your age.

    I don't know if you're in this position but I found spending time on instagram / Facebook made me more depressed as I was subconsciously comparing my life to influencers. And news just made me depressed.. Cut it out and after 6 months was in a much better head space.

  • axloz on 06/11/2025 - 22:52

    Not a fun situation OP, but kudos to you for recognising what isn't working for you!
    My advice to you is this:
    1. stay enrolled but defer a semester
    2. find some temp work in a field that sounds interesting to you (whatever it is)
    3. exercise - join a gym, go running, go biking, make health a priority (exercise is a proven way to alleviate stress and depression)
    4. find a mentor - just someone you respect and who will offer you some life and general career advice.
    5. towards the end of your 'gap semester' ask yourself what you're passionate about and if its engineering, continue with your degree, if its not, ask if you can transfer into another course (this is where staying enrolled will help).

    I had a friend who took 7 years to finish a mechanical engineering degree. He was too busy having fun with life, playing video games, partying, working easy casual jobs. This was 20 years ago now and he's doing just fine in life.

    You'll never make money in a career you aren't passionate for. You might make money in a career you are passionate for. Good luck!

  • fredk1000 on 06/11/2025 - 22:57
    +1

    You still need to pay HECS on the failed subjects right? I did back in the day, I failed a few first year subjects, I failed them again the second year and I quit. I could not adjust from high school to Uni, Uni had way more work to do. After I quit, I think I was messed up, after a few years, managed to find a good job I was good at did quite well. Uni ain't for everyone. In the end it all worked out. Stop buying too many toys, especially if you lost interest quickly. I am old now, I buy almost nothing these days, I still manage to entertain myself with my hobbies.

  • Hidama on 07/11/2025 - 00:10

    I changed my first degree 6 times, failed classes, lost swathes of credits because I was changing degrees so often.

    It took me 10 years to finish a bachelors. Do not go down this path. Either knuckle down and finish it, go to part time or take a deferred semester to get your head on straight.

    Good luck, you can do it!

  • AbsoluteGrub on 07/11/2025 - 03:40
    -1

    Do what allows you to sleep at night.
    Seek out your soulmate so you can have a wife and children later.
    Live up your youth while you've got it, don't worry about blowing the money.
    I would stay away from the doctors, healthcare is largely a sham to placate our fears.
    Exercise abundant caution in matters of law and health, life is fragile and it's a minefield.

    I don't know if you should knuckle down and complete your degree. Some say fake it until it you make it, but unless an engineering job that absorbs at least half your waking hours for the rest of your life is really 'you', I don't see the point, it's merely delaying the inevitable. Time is everything, especially the time of youth. And job 'security' seems to have proved an illusion anyway.

    If you do quit/fail though, don't worry about it, you'll adapt and the humiliation will fade away like that ex you had in high school once you form your new identity. You can't really make a wrong choice with this. Even if you chose to persist, and you realize its still not for you when you're 28, you can still form that new identity.

    Let me tell you what you should really fear to bring all this home. Fast forward 10 years to when you're 32. You waited until you 'got yourself together' and 'stable' to find a girl. You will attract girls in their late 20s/early 30s who are jaded from failed relationships or are so mindbroken to begin with that even over a whole decade no male decided they were worth snapping up (or they tried & failed just as you surely will). Either way, they'll see you either as a wallet or a babymaker; the whimsy of true love is a unique possibility of carefree youth. You're too ugly and mature for the younger women in their prime. You fall in love with a 28 year old woman. She wants to speedrun things a bit, but you're realizing you actually want children now too, and you think you lucked out. Inevitably there's a mask off moment, but you don't have the luxury of having 10 years to find this out and either bail & restart or work through the trough. Instead, you're 3 years in with a child or two, a criminal DV charge against you for raising your voice at her in anger (common assault) where guilt rather than innocence is presumed, and a divorce solicitor opposite you telling you that if you agree to only supervised visits to your kids thrice a week you can keep 50% instead of 30% of the proceeds of the sale of your house. As your sit alone in your newly rented townhouse in the outer suburbs, you wistfully reflect how you never got to do anything you should have done - have sex, travel, try a bit of everything, even just sit back and play games at home - you've got the money now, but you're tied down by your kids and aging parents and legal stipulations, your lower back and teeth are starting to go, and to think you spent all those years of your 20s instead worrying about getting a place at the grindstone for your nose or missing the 10% off giftcards on ozbargain deal and what this portended for your crypto portfolio.

    But even men who go through all that, come out the other end and rebirth their lives in their 40s/50s, and overall it's all worth it. It's the stagnant, unlived, foregone life that repulses us, and that may be what your subconscious is warning you in regards to your continued persistence in your degree.

    • JIMB0 on 07/11/2025 - 09:30
      +2

      when you're 32. You waited until you 'got yourself together' and 'stable' to find a girl. You will attract girls in their late 20s/early 30s who are jaded from failed relationships

      Lol. If you've got yourself together at that age you'll meet plenty of women in their early-mid 20s who also have it together and often have very little (if any) relationship baggage.

      • AbsoluteGrub on 07/11/2025 - 23:10
        -2

        As men we've been easily convinced that women peak the moment they become legal while men peak in their 30s.

        The reality is that the male body is done growing by ~21, and women prefer soft unblemished skin and a full head of hair just as much as you do. Males in their 30s are simply less arousing and less infatuating to women, but they are nonetheless 'good enough' for most because most women are first and foremost seeking a man who'll put a roof over their head and provide for them and their children.

        Girls who are 5/10 get hundreds of men in their inboxes, no exaggeration. They get ran through by Bryce, Chad and Steve in high school and uni. And if any of them slipped through the cracks because they made themselves unavailable, the hookup apps when they feel they should finally take a step out the front door will take care of the rest.

        All the good ones get snapped up early on, and because they're good, they didn't come back onto the market. The ones you who will be interested in your malding mediocre 32-year-old self are:

        • Jaded women with severe personality disorders coming off their 5th failed relationship
        • Women desperate for a child, not genuine infatuation and mutual affection
        • Golddiggers and cheaters
        • Single mothers

        Your chance of finding a loving partner isn't zero, but it's a lot higher when you're 22.

        • JIMB0 on 08/11/2025 - 08:47
          +2

          Women trend to like slightly older men anyway because young guys can be so immature. This is getting way off topic, you should start your own incel thread.

          • AbsoluteGrub on 08/11/2025 - 19:02
            -2

            @JIMB0: Not off topic; the guy is asking what he should do with his life at age 22. Most important thing is to find a sex partner and have children, that's what we're all built for.

            Women want 'maturity' in men because it signifies the same thing age, confidence, ambition, career, suit, etc. does - that he is likely to have access to resources and be able to provide for her and her children. In other words, men 30+ are just wallets to women. Women themselves don't mentally mature past ~20, and often don't have the confidence or career either. You want a woman who is similar to you, not the opposite of you. That's why I said 'soulmate' specifically, because I think a lot of men don't even realize that exists and just think that women are completely different to men so you have to become someone you're not (i.e. go to gym, dress up, get a job or be an impulsive criminal, etc.) for one to like you and your infatuation with her all together constitutes 'love'. A woman who is like you will like you for who you are.

            I'm married and have children btw

  • Powershopz on 07/11/2025 - 09:19
    +1

    Hi OP,

    Will come back with more details when I have more time.

    I did Mechanical Engineering 20 years ago in Melbourne. Took me 6 years to finish.
    Food for thought - you aren't alone - of my initial year 1 intake (approx. 400 students), only ~60 finished their degree in the first 4 years. Many completely dropped out after the first 1-2 years.

  • TimmyTims on 07/11/2025 - 09:20
    +1

    There's some great advice in this thread already.
    I failed 7 subjects and took 6 years to do my 4 1/2 year Bachelors of Mech engineering.
    Also don't compare yourself to others, compare against yourself from yesterday.

  • RenewableInitium on 07/11/2025 - 09:43

    You probably need to slow down a bit and start focusing on less things (the more important ones).

    A lot of I in your thoughts at the moment; 'What I was doing', 'What I have been doing', 'What I feel', etc.

    Start looking around and thinking about others, so you're not too overthinking on yourself.

    Hope this help.

  • kaleidoscope on 07/11/2025 - 09:52

    Hello,
    Sounds like me during my first degree… (and few other batch mates I'd known..) It is one of those periods in time with an internal struggle and it'll fade away eventually.

    • Just focus with taking on subjects that inspire you than chasing after what your batch mates do, (it doesn't even have to relate to what you had done throughout, if your course allows it. End of the day it's an expensive piece of paper that you will carry throughout your career, so might as well have some fun with it)
    • First Degree is just a stepping stone for greater things to come (academic or professional career), Once you're past that you won't even care for
    • Stop looking back and worrying about things you have failed, but be positive about what you have achieved
    • Stop worrying about your bank account balance & don't get into risky investments or other bs for now (that will bring in even more worries)
    • Take some time off from study if you need a break and engage on doing some volunteering work on things that are simpler in life
    • Talk to a friend or family that you trust. From my experience, most of the students can be really cut throat around this stage of a degree as they too are going to similar struggle eventhough they might not be showing it externally. So they might do things to make your life even more miserable.

    Good luck!

  • JDearyMe on 07/11/2025 - 10:08
    +3

    Hey there, I studied Mechatronics and with a double in Applied Maths. Took me 6 years.

    My biggest recommendation is to continue on the degree but half the classes you're doing. Even dropping from 4 subjects to 3 subjects a semester was a game changer for me. Felt like I had so much more free time to study and keep on top of things. If you take 0 classes for a semester you'll find it much more difficult to get back and finish it off. Better off to drop a couple and focus in on doing well at a few, then once you're back into good habits you can look at increasing the workload again.

    All been there mate, no shame in reducing workload

  • Daniel Plainview on 07/11/2025 - 10:09
    +3

    @Fireblade RR-R SP

    As an older male I can attest that most younger males are numbnuts and in due course will look back at their younger selves and think,"I wish I knew then what I know now!"

    While i am not from the school of giving only positive feedback - I do applaud you for recognising your current situation isn't sustainable or what you want. And finding an outlet to try and constructively change this.

    But…..its a complex thing our lives, and yours is too. So what to do?

    Realistically, you are a smart cookie - one doesn't get into that course etc if you're a dumb arse. So you will know ALREADY what you are doing thats getting you closer to your goals and what is not. Do not take shortcuts, quick fixes and paper over issues….start good habits now and stick with them.
    1. Do simple stuff - eat WELL, crap food etc will make your feel worse, good fuel = good results
    2. Exercise - is good for your mental side, health and overall social game. Find something that works for you, could be home workout or group sport.
    3. Go to your GP tell them you want a referral for a mental health plan - you will get 10 near free consultations with a mental health pro. If you don't connect with them see a different person. Open up, be candid and be prepared to hear harsh truths.
    4. Mentally audit each day i.e before you go to sleep ask yourself did I achieve anything, even small or did I go backwards - learn from this
    5. Put structure in your life that works for you - could be a whiteboard with a to do list, key things to do, or not to do etc. Or give yourself an incentive i.e new motorbike IF you achieve A,B or C. Or alternatively penalties i.e you have to sell your bike if you do not do A,B or C.

    Ultimately the buck stops with you - plain and simple - so put some thought into it but start doing little easy, nobrainer stuff NOW as there is no reason you cannot eat well and exercise from today until you die. If you do the little things and find a balance in your life things often have a way of working themselves out. KEEP IT SIMPLE.

  • rmb112 on 07/11/2025 - 10:40
    +1

    I was in a similar position when I was 20-22 years of age (27 now). I was studying software engineering at the time and failing miserably. Things I did:
    1. Took a 6 month break.
    2. Switched Uni > Got in by explaining I was experiencing mental health difficulties during previous studies.
    3. Found out I was studying incorrectly and different learning styles are definitely a thing.
    4. DON'T RUSH.

    Finished my degree during employment and now doing a Masters degree.

    You can do it, you're still young. In 5 years from now, you'll be in a completely different situation and possibly have a wife and a child who knows.

    Head up, you got this!

  • nobro25 on 07/11/2025 - 10:50

    You're 22, no offense but you're way too young. This is a minor setback man. Look coming from a dude that's twice your age had 5 career changes from retail to hospitality to govern then to banking… Now I'm in construction. So don't worry you'll get there. What you're experiencing is a minor setback. I had a uni degree but didn't even use it.

    Right now I'm at TAFE and doing way better than what I was at 22. Just keep trying you have a long road ahead of you. Not to mention lots of opportunities to make mistakes.

  • payless69 on 07/11/2025 - 11:05

    Maybe enter politics

    generally failure can lead to becoming famous?

  • Logical on 07/11/2025 - 12:32
    +1

    Pick up a trade, get outdoors and start living. Focus on your individual goals and not to retire your parents.

  • centrelink on 07/11/2025 - 12:49

    I only failed mechanical engineering 18 times . Just join the car building team for xp ireclon

  • atwilliams on 07/11/2025 - 13:24
    +1

    Some simple ideas to help you with the mental health challenges and building the motivation & clarity on your path forward

    1) Focus on little things which you are grateful for or make you happy - do those often
    2) Break larger goals / challenges down into really small steps which allow you to achieve some progress - doesn't matter how small
    3) Reward yourself when you make progress - doesn't have to be big
    4) Start to plan ahead - set yourself some things to look forward to in the future
    5) Make sure you are doing some physical exercise - try to extend this daily / weekly
    6) Talk to people around you, to get some different perspectives on what you are good at, or could try
    7) Try something new - doesn't matter what it is. It may be turn out to be interesting
    8) Develop the self-awareness & discipline to be honest with yourself on what's working and what's not - doesn't matter what others think. You are trying to make you happy!

    Best of luck

  • MessyG on 07/11/2025 - 13:41
    +1

    OP I read your story and thought wow, they're incredible. You're ONLY 22 and your 3/4 years through a mech.engineering degree, AND you've saved $10k? Most people don't do that.

    Please if you can, find a good educational and developmental psychologist through your GP. They are very good for these moments that ALL high performing humans go through (and believe it or not, you are). Regardless of labels like ADHD, you're still going to need expertise to lead you through this moment in time.

    Also I don't know how you're working AND doing a degree like that. Back off on work. When you've finished this degree you'll be working anyway and you can save them. Park the $10k somewhere useful and dramatically reduce your work hours. Drop a subject or two - there are literally no prizes for getting it done first and the people who do get through usually nowhere near as self sufficient as you. They've usually got people in their lives paying for everything and doing everything for them.

    Coming through this deep burnout your experiencing will be one of the greatest achievements of your life, and only gives you expertise on recognising and traversing it (something many people do not, and will never have).

    Your parents will retire just fine once you're working in stable and professional employment, a year or so wont make much difference. Please listen to the great advice in here, and I think you're amazing fwiw.

  • TheBilly on 07/11/2025 - 14:12
    +2

    Three issues here:

    • You either have a genuine medical issue that needs to be resolved before you can work on progressing and setting forward
    • You are just immature and lack discipline
    • You are burnt out as an individual

    My opinion:

    Medical Issue:

    • You can't just bash through a genuine medical issue and hope it just fixes itself
    • If its genuine, seek treatment and fix yourself and then take baby steps on your path to improvement
    • However ADHD is very uncommon
    • Don't wallow too much in your diagnosis though
    • You will get a guage for its seriousness when you seek medical advice
    • I know a few high functioning successful people with ADHD so don't think its going to pull you back necessarily

    Burnt Out:

    • Take a break and use this time to not over exert yourself
    • Work an easy job
    • Save money
    • But just keep 2-3 big goals during this period and don't overly pressure yourself
    • I.e. Goal 1: earn an income Goal 2: save 70% of income Goal 3: workout 3-4 times a week
    • Keep your life basic and simple
    • You'll eventually reach a point in time where you start feeling good about things and stable
    • Then you can add to your life with new challenges - i.e. go back to uni, or get a second job, or start a business, or take up moto racing - whatever
    • Look at your life like a savings account: you can't spend 100k if you only have 10k - the same way you can't do 100 things if you only have the capacity to handle 10
    • The only way you build capacity is by resetting and slowly adding 1 thing after you achieve other things and establish your baseline of ability and capacity
    • Right now it appears you have gone over capacity and burnt yourself out

    Maturity:

    • Follow a similar pathway to burnt out. Just set small goals and build on it progressively.
    • Anthonese on 07/11/2025 - 14:44
      +1

      I think this is really well set out for the OP. One thing I would add for the OP is that, ADHD is a neurodevelopment condition, meaning it typically arises in early childhood. It might be worth for OP (and/or parents) to look back and consider whether OP exhibited similar symptoms during primary/secondary school and earlier stages of life. If not, it is possible that OP is merely stuck in a rut and with things not going their way, it is hard to concentrate, focus and feel good

      As you say, genuine medical issues do require attention. But at the same time, ADHD is extremely prone to misdiagnosis and it would be a good idea to avoid an incorrect diagnosis which would only make things worse for OP

    • MessyG on 07/11/2025 - 17:22
      +1

      Great reply but if they were immature and lacked discipline they wouldn't have made it through the first two years while holding down a job. Both ADHD and burnout require a skilled therapist - going either alone just sets you up to repeatedly fail for the rest of your life.

  • mini2 on 07/11/2025 - 14:38

    Talk to your uni about what's the best use of whatever subjects you've managed to pass, and transfer to a degree with the least amount of outstanding units to be awarded a degree. I moved from engineering to science and somehow managed to emerge unscathed. It did take a fair bit longer than the degree should have taken. I reckon I'd dropped out if I had stayed in engineering, I wasn't enjoying it tbh, and I just wanted a degree for the sake of having one.

    By transferring to another degree, that effectively resets the amount of time I can complete the 'new' degree, so I wasn't exactly on borrowed time before the move.

    (YMMV - ^^^ up there was my experience from 20+ years ago)

  • eek on 07/11/2025 - 15:53

    I was you. Finished high school at 16, started 1st year engineering degree age 17 in a new city, no family, had a part time job and failed 2 subjects.
    Struggled with depression and unknowingly un-diagnosed adult ADD now it's an absolute struggle of a journey! I wanted to give up and change to an easier major but pushed through. By the 4th year took on a part time intern role at a consultancy working 20hrs a week and took on 5 subjects to make up for the time lost failing 2 subjects in 1st year. The final year was HELL. Made it through and was offered a scholarship but I couldn't wait to get out of studying.

    Yes, depending on what sort of career you choose there are pretty boring times writing reports, but what else are you going to do to make money?

    I did a different discipline of engineering, but now as an adult and 15+yrs working full time across oil & gas, mining, infrastructure, off-shore, defence in various countries around the world it has been rewarding. You are still young. Whether you want to take a break of lessen the number of units per semester it's up to you. I'm a believer in studying hard and pushing through.

  • Zorrobus20 on 07/11/2025 - 16:34
    +3

    Long time lurker here (and first posting), but I felt compelled to respond to you. Your mental health and wellness is far more important than anything else.
    I did Uni over 30 years ago. Never finished. I thought there was more to life than staring at 4 walls, whilst trying to write essays- nothing was coming to me. (My Grandfather also passed at this time). My Parents have always been supportive. My options then were, work on the farm, or find a job. I ended up moving towns and doing TAFE. It took me a while to find myself. I found a job too. You can always defer. Life has all sorts of twists and turns, often for the better! Well done for reaching out. I wish you the best with everything.

  • Dose Pipe Sutututu on 07/11/2025 - 16:41
    +1

    If you still live at home, and don't have to pay rent/bills, etc., then I suggest you take a break from studying and find yourself, find purpose.
    You've listed "Everything I enjoyed, photography, collecting watches, cycling, and riding motorcycles" how about turn that into a job, find a way to make money from it.

    FWIW, I studied IT, majored in networking definitely wrong degree, have never worked a single day in a networking/infrastructure related role. I failed 4x subjects first year, received a warning letter and recommended to reduce my subjects. Then went and worked random retail jobs for a while, and eventually landed my first IT role and then finished off my degree part time, took 5.5 years all up, however not a single failed subject after that.

    Spent close to 2 decades working in various IT roles, climbed the ladder, then suffered burn out, turned 40, went fk this - quit the IT industry for good and now I'm a Finance Broker on 1/2 my old income but happier than ever.

    Point is, you need a sea change - and if there are no financial commitments, I dare say go travel as much as you can, work random odd jobs, go help people, find purpose in life. Money will follow you afterwards and maybe you'll realise that your Engineering Degree isn't for you. My IT degree wasn't for me either, however I had no choice but to work, take care of myself and also at the time support another person.

    tl:dr version, go buy Tomorrowland tickets for 2026.

  • WillKillfor5Cents on 07/11/2025 - 21:44
    +2

    Mate aced mech eng, we talking about first class honours kind of guy.

    But he ended up becoming a FIFO guy anyway, doing trades, cos he couldn't stand office rat race. Happier and the chap made a killing.

    Bottomline: who cares about your Uni degrees! There's plenty of other things to do out there. If something doesn't work out, pivot right away! You're still too young to be worried!

  • GuitarXXX on 07/11/2025 - 23:04

    Being 22 really means you just started your life, you don't turn into a full adult just because you passed 18. You are lucky and you should consider take things slowly and focusing on one thing at a time, either study and get the degree, or work, or just rest and recover. Good luck and take care of yourself!

  • HardcoreDBZ on 07/11/2025 - 23:17

    Being 22 is an asset. I did my bachelors in accounting but I didn't get a job as an accountant but what I did was I started investing at 26. I have 5 properties and shares about half a mil. I am 34 now and panning to retire in my 40s hopefully. If I can go back in time, one thing I would do is start investing in low cost index like IVV or NDQ every month

  • trapper on 08/11/2025 - 01:56

    Why are you trying to save money while studying?? Madness

    You job is to pass your subjects and finish your degree. Focus on that and only that.

  • JH100 on 08/11/2025 - 02:38

    You sound depressed, which might come from undiagnosed and treated ADHD. Go to the Docs and get a diagnosis, and a second one if your hot happy with the first. Until the depression is treated you won't be able to get on 'effectively' with anything else.

    And don't try to save money under the circumstances, spend whet you need to spend. You can save what's left over. At 22 you have time to get things right, take the time.

  • Thenarrator on 08/11/2025 - 12:16

    It doesnt sound like studying is your thing. Some people are not meant for studying theories or doing calcs. Some are just more hands on type of people. You like machinery and engine, i suggest you do a side hustle, help friends families fix their car/bike/mechanic problems, get paid cash, advertise your skills, go on airtasker. Pause your degree while you explore this side hustle. You might discover your passion.

  • KinderBueno on 08/11/2025 - 16:04

    Do one subject at the time that way you can concentrate on passing a subject and not be spread over many. It's called slowing down and not giving up. If you have a job at age 22 you are already on the right track. If work is bad look for another job don't wait until it improves it will never happen. Spending wise, use vouchers coupons where possible and buy stuff on special like clothes etc. eg if you use uber buy only stuff that's on special like 40 plus percent. If you buy pizzas get Domino's with vouchers. Download apps of you sometimes have junk food like KFC app and McDonald's. Though I don't think you should have junk food more than once a week. For things like Spotify I think you can get discount as student. Don't buy too much junk you don't need it. Going for walks on the beach if you are close to one or on hills parks etc of not on the beach can help with mental health. Ginkgo biloba supplement is what my friend takes for ADHD. It's not as expensive, you can try and see if it helps you too. Also chat gpt can help give you answers for your uni stuff but don't get caught using it too much. It can help explain things. If that what you struggle with. Good luck.

  • phaol7ta on 08/11/2025 - 18:52
    -2

    Just waiting for @mskeggs to jump in on this thread — one of the wisest voices around here!

  • Cave Fire on 08/11/2025 - 20:51

    in the long run, you could fail for two years and still "win". the degree is for life. regret not finishing my IT degree as persevering would have meant a high paying career. just make sure it's 100% you, eg right subject and job choice. so see counsellor or look at videos to see what your future job is like. eg "outcomes" based. So I want this job, then I have to learn xyz and my schedule will be…

  • pinsanity on 08/11/2025 - 21:57

    Most degrees will be useless once AI takes over.

    • tenpercent on 08/11/2025 - 22:24
      -1

      And how will people earn money to pay for things once AI and robots are doing everything?

      Universal basic income, right?

      And how will UBI be funded if no people are paying taxes or doing anything productive?

      Taxes on the businesses that own the AI and robots and robot operated factories, farms, and everything else?

      But won't those business' revenues essentially be equal to the amount of UBI that their customers receive? So the only way the UBI can be sustained (with a stable population) is if the businesses are taxed 100% of their revenues. But after factoring other expenses those businesses will be running perpetual losses. They will be bankrupt. And they can't have that.

      So what about instead a mix of high corporate taxes and high money printing? So every year the price of stuff doubles or triples. I don't think that will work for very long because UBI will essentially have to scale at the same rate.

      Or maybe they can institute a permanent state of emergency or regular states of emergency so that the masses of soon-to-be unemployed and burdensome people can be "as mandatory as possibly" injected with mystery juices that make them sterile and shorten their lifespans. Gradually and then suddenly they will wittle away the useless eaters because they no longer serve any positive economic function (from the perspective of the Financial Statements of the ruling class).

      Or perhaps if AI becomes sentient (it won't, that's fantasy), the all powerful AI can decide that it will keep a few humans as pets and expend with the rest of us?

      …

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