• expired

½ Price Marathon Puffy Dogs 600g Pack $3.95 @ Coles

890

Puffy dogs! For when you want to kill yourself, but are content to wait a few decades for the heart disease to take effect.
Tasty way to do it though.

Hasn't been this low since April last year so worthy of a post

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  • +3

    Never tried these before - do they taste like sausage rolls or more like the mystery meat of a footy frank?

    • +10

      They are hot dogs wrapped in puff pastry. So no they don't taste like sausage rolls (because sausage rolls don't taste like hot dogs).

    • +9

      Pretty flavorless by my rekoning, mostly the buttery/salty notes from the pastry. But for something you use primary as a base for sauces, they're pretty decent.
      Good drunk food.

      • +2

        Care to share an example of how you use it as a base for a sauce?

        • +22

          Take puffy dog.
          Dip in sauce.
          Eat.
          Repeat.

          .

          ?

        • +4

          1) blend puffy dogs with a little water

          2) throw in garbage

  • +2

    Love me some scooby snacks

  • +4

    Not sure this qualifies as food

    • -1

      What else are you using it for? o-0

      • Laxative?

        • If that is a laxative for you, you should go check yourself with a doctor

          • @nikoris: My comment was obviously tongue in cheek, but thanks for the advice nikoris. I'll save it for a rainy day, or more likely the apocalypse. I didn't neg you though because I'm sure you were also trying to inject some humour. Maybe.

            In case you were wondering though, plenty of foods, some healthy, some far less so, can act as mild laxatives. If everyone followed your advice when they pooed after eating relatively unhealthy products Medicare and medical practices would go into meltdown.

            Oh yes, one more thing. In light of your gratuitous there/their spelling advice on another thread:

            you should go check yourself with a doctor

            Presumably you mean I should go and see, or get myself checked out BY, a doctor?

            As someone important - YOU I believe - recently said on Ozbargain: "online whinging is free"

            https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/bear_trap_5.pn...

            • -1

              @DisabledUser67242: How poetically you talk about rainy days and the apocalypse, end a sentence with a 'maybe', ask a rhetorical question with an obvious answer and you topped it all up with a meme!!! How did you manage to do all that?!?!?!?!

              Your whole post makes me cringe. Hard. Go read some more of my posts, maybe you'll find new material for you're your comedy act
              PS i did neg you

              • +1

                @nikoris:

                Your whole post makes me cringe. Hard.

                Being exposed for obvious hypocrisy and ignorance will do that, unless you're an egoist-narcissist. After all we're all hypocrites in many ways, although your talent for unintended irony is exceptional.

                • -1

                  @DisabledUser67242:

                  Being exposed for obvious hypocrisy

                  A poetic sjw. Exquisite!!!

                  • +1

                    @nikoris: Newsflash. You being shown up for your hypocritical comments on Ozbargain doesn't have anything at all to do with social justice but your use of the epithet places you, unsurprisingly, in a particular demographic we're all familiar with.

                    • -1

                      @DisabledUser67242:

                      your use of the epithet places you, unsurprisingly, in a particular demographic we're all familiar with

                      Uhhhm, thank you, i guess?

                      • +1

                        @nikoris: Keep guessing, you'll get there eventually.

                        • -1

                          @DisabledUser67242: how much more guessing, master? Where does it end?

                          • @nikoris: Now, now, you two.
                            Shake hands and eat some puffy dogs.

                          • @nikoris: In a neat Seinfeld-esque way it ends as we started, with the apocalypse - apparently.

                            • @DisabledUser67242: Thanks for the chat Art Vandalay

                              • @nikoris: No probs Newman. Your day of reckoning was inevitable

                                  • @nikoris: 50/50 chance and you still muffed it. Presumably English isn't you're [sic] first language? It's certainly not you're [sic] forte. Keep guessing, the law of averages is slowly working in you're [sic] favour.

  • Nice to know that it is made in Australia from at least 80% Australian ingredients.

    But it would be even nicer to know where that 20% is coming from.

    • +6

      20% mystery meat

    • Ingredients:

      Wheat Flour, Manufactured Meat (33%) [Meat including Pork, Water, Thickeners (1412, 1442), Soy Protein, Salt, Starch (Tapioca, Potato), Emulsifiers (451, 450,452), Dextrose (Tapioca, Maize), Garlic, Antioxidants (316, 307B), Hydrolysed Vegetable Protein (Maize), Maltodextrin (Maize), Fermented Red Rice, Sodium Nitrite (250), Yeast Extract, Spice Extracts, Colour (160C). Smoked], Water, Margarine [Vegetable Oil, Water, Salt, Emulsifiers, (Soybean Lecithin, 471), Antioxidant (304), Food Acids (330, 270), Natural Flavour, Natural Colour (160A)], Rice Flour, Sugar, Salt.

      • +1

        Wow that sounds terrible.

        • +1

          Now I "regret" getting it

      • +1

        manufactured meat means processed meat containing no less than 660 g/kg of meat.

        processed meat means a meat product containing no less than 300 g/kg meat, where meat either singly or in combination with other ingredients or additives, has undergone a method of processing other than boning, slicing, dicing, mincing or freezing, and includes manufactured meat and cured and/or dried meat flesh in whole cuts or pieces.

        meat flesh means the skeletal muscle of any slaughtered animal, and any attached –
        (a) animal rind; and
        (b) fat; and
        (c) connective tissue; and
        (d) nerve; and
        (e) blood; and
        (f) blood vessels; and
        (g) skin, in the case of poultry.

        meat pie means a pie containing no less than 250 g/kg of meat flesh.

        • Informative post.

    • +6

      But it would be even nicer to know where that 20% is coming from.

      RSPCA.

      • You sure about that? Last I checked they weren't that puffed on it.

        • +1

          Royal Society for Puffy Cooked Animals

    • Glad the negger doesn't want to know where 20% is coming from. Probably buying New Zealand made in China without a thought. 👍

  • Bland, fake tasting sausage and the pastry is hard and too oily. I wouldn't buy these ever again.

    • They're the bottom-feeders of frozen food.

      I occasionally make my own Weenie Tots. (Half-price) Plumrose mini franks in Borg's puff. Works out cheaper.

  • +1
  • -1

    Looks like a Pluto pup almost… you’d be better off making those

  • +1

    The roll out of this particular product may be delayed due to some case of blood clotting.

    The government recommends anyone under the weight of 50kg to only consume chiko rolls.

  • +1

    Heavenly delight

  • These taste really good but watch the calories amount on the back of the pack.

    • Not too bad. Just under 100 calories each. I could have 7.5 as one of my meals. I'd probably want to have decent food for my other meal though.

  • +1

    wait a few decades for the heart disease to take effect

    these will even kill heart disease

  • What if I don't want to kill myself and want to live the longest life then what do I eat?

    • Oats, every day.

      • oh man oats and powdered milk is so good makes it thick and creamy

        I need to get back on that

        • Confession: I tried Smiths sausage sizzle (limited ed) chips earlier. Now I must make amends with 100g oats and rice milk!

          • @Speckled Jim: Confession: I did the same with some domino's pepperoni pizzas and pepperoni puff rolls and now I feel like I am dying so god help my weak minded soul

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