My kid had traumatic experience with the school teacher. He yells and screams at the kids.
I have reported to the school, and as expected, they have not taken any action. What else can I do? My kid is scared and is very anxious about this whole thing. What legal options do I have? What escalation mechanism I have to stop this abusive teacher from hurting other kids?
@SpicyStew: Asia has 48 countries (or 50 if you view Taiwan and HK as countries). Are you assuming all countries are run by dictators?
@KaTst3R: its been ingrained in society and cultral etiquette since ancient times and handed down.
borders might seperate them but there is cultral/social similarities between them including religion and more importantly, rice.
@SpicyStew: It mostly a culture thing and some countries are run by dictatorship but Japan, South Korea, Singapore are democratic countries… Japanese kids are the most disciplined kids I witness, it their culture that instill disciplined as soon as they are born, it not just at home but at school and institutions, they all have disciplinary tasks for them to do and they get to repeat them year in year out and so it becomes second nature to them.
did you see the Japanese football team and their supporters in Qatar? their change rooms and their stadium seats are spotless once they are out of there. Half of the world couldn't believe what they are seeing
@Hearthstone: By Japanese kids do you mean the little remainder of them? They keep to themselves so much, there is hardly any left they are not procreating.
No matter how clean they keep a football stadium, it is an unsustainable cultral/social system.
Priorities?
have you been to Japan?
The kids are well-disciplined, we see hundreds and hundreds of kids go on school trips and excursion and none of them get out of line, they all do what they told, very polite to tourist, lunch break they all quietly sits in their spots eating their lunch, when done they packed up their rubbish and leave the place spotless.
on public transport I seen kids probably age anything between 2-5 and they sit dead still in their seats reading books and keep to themselves. Amazing well-disciplined culture not the kids but the adults too, polite, helpful and all rules following citizens
That part of the culture has a lot of positives to it though there is also a downside. Much less likely to speak up when something is wrong. Just head down, continue on.
@Hardlyworkin: no system is perfect but I rather prefer the Japanese system where most people are well behaved, no gun violent, no petty theft, kids don't go vandal stuff
@Hearthstone: Japan has one of the highest suicide rates in the world, there is no need for guns or violence its passive aggressive system works wonders, i know.
Has your kid refused to go to school or behaved badly before school. If so, then it is serious and needs to be addressed with principal & teacher. If not, then it will probably settle down in time as the teacher & student get to know each others requirements. Good luck. Not easy being a parent today. At least the "cane" has been outlawed.
Reasons why teachers do not get paid enough. Dealing with "helicopter" parents.
It's why I quit working in schools - parents were the biggest problem, followed by their kids. While there are obviously genuinely bad teachers, frequently abusive and entitled parents seem to be the norm these days.
He yells and screams at the kids.
Not sure how you construe this as a traumatic event. Has your kid never had someone raise their voice at them before? You sure your kid or some other kid wasn't being a misbehaving little poopoo pants and disrupting the entire class? There is either more to this than you said, or there is a bit of overreaction occurring.
If it's a public school, you need to grin and bear it. The Teachers' Union is one of the strongest there is (in NSW); only the Police Association Union is stronger in NSW.
The teacher will not be sacked.
You have a choice - take them to a Private School and pay for it.
Raise it with the principal, if not happy go to the regional director.
Though I find your story hard to believe.
The amount of parents who send their kids to school and expect the teacher to babysit them and guide them through the most basic of manners that they should've learnt at home is ridiculous.
The teacher is there to help the kids learn. They're not there to fix behavioural issues.
My kid is scared and is very anxious about this whole thing
Does the kid have a history of this? In some cases it speaks volumes about how they're told off at home - the ones that acted up in my classes and were shouted at, had little parent interaction, walked all over their parents, and barely ever were disciplined.
i have friends (who are teachers) who have their parent teacher days and they get reprimanded for not fixing the kid's problems/behavioural issues. And we wonder why we have a nation of disgruntled teachers leaving the workforce.
Given the OP's history they're literally the walking definition of a Karen
Every single experienced teacher either:
Or does none of these and actually follows the schools framework. What a narrow cited comment. 👍🏻
I just realised who you are. In a way you are a teacher in your own right with the cubbies. Do you apply this same mentality with them?
Front the teacher yourself.
Failing a resolution .. Bikies.
It could be very possible that your kid is the one that is causing trouble for the entire class.
I'd listen to the teacher over your child about what's going on.
collect video recording evidence
Tell your kid to get a spoon full of concrete, eat it and harden the f up. Bloody snowflakes these days.
You beat me to it…dammit.
What year level is your child in?
You can lodge a complaint with the Regional Education Department. eg Outer Eastern Melbourne. Your principal has a boss who is very keen for this not to escalate to talk radio… or their boss.
As parents you need to support them. If you don’t trust your own kids who will. Doesn’t matter what people here say.
My son is now 35. When he was in Grade 11 & 12 at a GPS boys school, he played in the firsts basketball team (he was a state player, so was a good player) and he had a coach that bullied him. He was also a teacher at the school This guy had a son in the same team, so he harassed the competition as he wanted his son to look the best, which was never going to happen. My son had been warned about this guy before we accepted the scholarship to this school, but he didn't tell us. The man had older sons and the same thing had happened to the better players. He was just a bully and would bully other kids as well and was very clever about it - no witnesses. There was a boy boarder who was in the same position as my son and he was in a very poor mental state. Our son would not tell us his name so we could help him
We reported it to the Head of basketball, the sportsmaster and the school counsellor. There was a meeting with them plus the coach which my husband attended. I didn't get there as I was stuck in a dentist chair, the procedure taking longer than expected. The coach spent the whole meeting attacking my husband and bad mouthing our son with the others just saying nothing to stop him.
The school was supposed to have a zero tolerance on bullies policies, so I made an appointment with the Headmaster. I got nowhere. The bully coach's father-in-law was a former Headmaster of the school. So the old boys network just protected him.
This guy was also directly responsible for an injury at a national tournament which ended my son's playing prospects. We were never informed of the incident.
They didn't seek any medical help for him. He had to ask for Nurofen, ice, to see the tournament physio, get crutches etc. So there was extreme negligence on the part of the coach and the manager.
The incident itself happened at a training early in the morning when they had a 9 am game - which was an important game. My son had been to nationals before and when the coach had said a light training run, he expected àn actual run. No idiot does a heavy training when you have a game at 9 am. I had spoken to the coach, manager and Head of basketball as well as putting it in writing to each that as per the advice of a sports doctor and physio, our son was not to go on a court without ankle braces. The light training run was in fact on court training and quite intensive. My son didn't have his braces as he didn't expect anyone would be that silly. He told the coach and the others that he couldn't go on as he didn't have his braces. He was yelled at, abused and told to get on that court NOW. He didn't argue as that wasn't his style. He Sustained a severe ankle injury and he is still paying the price for that injury. The team lost the game unsurprisingly. 1) they were exhausted. 2) they had seen a friend get severely injured and that is hard to deal with when you are not at a certain. Level of player and experience, which none of them were (my son had a final at state level where his teammate suffered a severe fracture in warm-ups but they had been well prepared for the right mindset to go on). We did not.put in a formal complaint about this incident because we were concerned about how he would be treated - it was that bad for him.
That coach also bad mouthed our son to his club and representative coaches (out of school) and also to 2 coaches choosing state teams and anyone else he could. Luckily it had little impact as our son was already well known (and possibly the coach was a known jerk).
So for his 3rd year we changed schools. As an elite player, he did his grade 11 and 12 over 3 years. This allowed him to cope with all the training (personal and team) he had to do each day.
So my only advice is change schools and put in a formal complaint. You could ask for a class change as it is still early in the year, but the treatment by other kids will continue.
Incidentally my mother was a teacher and she would behave like this - a really bully but she wouldn't swear. I didn't they would get away you with this these days. Nothing would have stopped her.
If you can get some evidence and go to the principal with documented examples, dates and times you might achieve disciplinary action or even dismissal of of the teacher. The teacher behaviour won't change though. I am not in sure how secret recordings would go down legally. Your son's mental health is important and this environment is not good for him.
I can't wait for part two of your autobiography, the dentist was my favourite part.
So for his 3rd year we changed schools. As an elite player, he did his grade 11 and 12 over 3 years. This allowed him to cope with all the training (personal and team) he had to do each day.
TL;DR So, looks your son was a scholastically impaired jock who needed 3 years to complete his senior secondary curriculum. Also looks like you copied your long winded post from some dumb American movie.
And, it's years 11 and 12 not grade 11 and 12.
And it ‘looks like’ you are ignorant of the sensible choice to do HSC or equivalent over 3 years which most times is done by better students (not weak ones) for a variety of good reasons.
It is very much Grade 11 or 12. Or if you are so inclined Year 11 or 12. They are used interchangeably in just about every school. You can’t be that ignorant can you?
when is the book out?
Wow! There’s some really insensitive replies to your comment. Not everything is bullying but this does sound like with very real consequences. I really hope the people making of a joke of it are there for any kids they might have if something similar happens to them.
It's not the content that is being made fun of, it's the way it was written, and the insane amount of extraneous information. Could have been summed up in about 1/10 of what was written.
Fair enough, but it’s obviously something that is important to them.
I didn't read until now.
This is about a year 11/12 close to adulthood not a kid.
Some of these kids do become the elite of the future. The age is not a factor, bullying can be devastating at any age, what is of concern at different ages is different, but but very good people have been severely damaged by things that happen as young adults.
@morse: Trash talk and injuries happens at "elite" level competitive sports. They overcome physical/mental challenge, that's why they are "elites"
@SpicyStew: Some do, some don’t. Some come out years later about their struggles and the harm it has done to them and their families. At least now days sporting clubs take mental health seriously.
What did the principal promise or say they would do?
Are the children of parents that agree with you all friends of your child?
Yeah I call BS on this. I get the distinct impression OP is omitting a lot of details here. Any teacher worth their salt will not go off on child like this. But with that said, I am sure there might be some teachers who might be provoked by your “little darlings” and thus might lose it on an occasion (and off course this shouldn’t be condoned). But I would like to know what provoked the teacher to act in this way. I would bet good money and say there is not a chance hell that a teacher would act this way without being provoked. OP’s also loves to embellish in his posts looking at past threads. So as mention in the beginning I call BS until more light comes into play.
Jeez and it's only the first week back. Maybe the teacher wasn't happy at only getting seven weeks holiday over Christmas! (Kidding, of course. Teachers are legends… but I do envy the time off)
If the teacher yells and screams at the kids then just get your kid the f*** out of there. Dont wait around for the school to turn the teacher into a nice person.
Jeez there are some morons in this forum. Dont listen to them.
Seems like a one sided story here.
As an example of how stories from kids can become a horrific story in the eye of the parents:
I went to watch my kids school swimming program one day. And the swimming instructor made a game where if the kids couldn't swim from one end to the other within stopping, they had to hop out and do pushups. The kids had a laugh and no one forced them to do it, most didn't and the ones that did, did some pathetic pushups imo then they hoped back into the pool.
Later that day, I'm on the Facebook group for the school and I see a massive rant from one of the parents who was complaining that their child was forced to do pushups and was embarrassed and yelled at and accused the school of running a jail or army and demanded answers. Other parents replied saying that their child had to do the same but no one else actually said it was a bad thing, just confirming it happened which gave the original parent enough confirmation that this was some form of corporal punishment that the school needed to be held accountable for. Any defence from other parents about the program was met with heated arguments about punishment. So it was pointless trying to change their mind about what actually happened.
Next day the school issued an apology and explained it was a fun game for the kids and no one was forced but now that will be stopped.
When I went to watch the swimming class again there were a bunch more parents waiting to see if this will happen again and were ready to start flailing their arms in protest. But they didn't, the kids swam a boring, normal swimming class and the kids were bored.
No fun allowed these days.
There is no loser in soccer game when my kids were playing, everyone get a certificates and medals
I told my son this is not how the real-world works, when you lose you lose, when you failed your exam no one going to give you a medal for turning up
when you failed at an interview, that organization not going to create a second job for you.
When you lose you should be disappointed and you should accept no medal, you learn from it and you tried bloody hard next time to win.
You gotta learn to hate losing so you can love winning.
Primary school teacher here, seen this from parents a thousand times. Quick tip for ya in general, manage your impulsivity in your communication with the school.
In response to your question, if you are unsatisfied with the school's response you can do a rather un-ozbargainy thing and waste our tax dollars by demanding a formal inquiry. But the real question you gotta ask is what is the long term impact your response to this situation having on your child because the only lesson being taught here is how to be a victim.
I honestly don't know how you do it with the calibre of parents out there these days (see my post just above yours).
My hat is off to you.
Same here. I'm shocked at how teachers are treated by parents and students. There's just no respect. No wonder teachers are leaving in droves.
Wowsers, I can see why you teach primary. Such a big man! Go pick on kids your own size mate.
Loved child is being a used by teacher..
I know, I'll ask Ozbargain!
FYI the education department likes to cover up and hide things and put on a "its all good here, nothing to see" facade. They don't really like to take responsibility. Happened to my kid when someone from her same class injured her during class and put her in hospital. Asked to put the other kid in another class, they said no. Investigation was done but when I asked for the report, they wanted me to pay for it. LOL
Best thing to do for your kid if you are really concerned, as others have said, just change school asap.
Yep change schools. Teachers ALL talk and your child WILL be treated differently.
My son was strangled by another student. Teacher said it wasn't that bad because the other kid said he only used one hand. Like it made a difference? Education department didn't do anything. Teachers were passive aggressive with me for the rest of his schooling. It was clear they had been talking major shit about me. I should have moved him. Please move your child.
Did you write a complain to department of education?
Yes, they did nothing. There were even pictures of my son's neck attached because he had red marks on both sizes where he was strangled. This happened in the classroom the teacher didn't even notice.
Education department came back to us and said it had been handled by the school.
@Octopusgarden: Same with me lol. The worse thing was when I wanted to see the report that they compiled, they claimed it was confidential and they wanted me to pay like 50-100 dollars for it. wtf
@mrvaluepack: Was it NSW edu department?
Honestly I was more upset with the response than the child's behaviour. I know things happen. It is how it is handled.
And when you strangle the teacher with one hand, they file a police report. Hypocrites.
She told me he came from a nice family as if it discounts this child's behaviour..
The thing is in a workplace there would be no context that you would be expected to work alongside someone who strangled you. Yet my child who was scared of this kid now was expected to go to class everyday with him.
@Octopusgarden: Is this public or private school? Prob good enough reason to move them if it’s physical violence? 🤯
@Octopusgarden: If someone is strangled they are dead.
Similar to ‘electrocuted’ and ‘drowned’. Dead and dead.
“Attempted to strangle” would make more sense.
Having said that imo you should have/could have made a police report.
is it too soon to teach a primary kid, not to give a **** what someone else says, including your teacher.
Yelling / cussing seems like a standard if you're kid is going to encounter any bullying throughout life.
Buy your kid a "spy watch" or "spy pen" … Be aware the best ones only record for about 20 minutes at most, and the cheap ones only several minutes. So the kid presses a button the moment the yelling starts, points the device at the yelling teacher, and looks somewhere else just holding it in the same position so it's not obvious what they're doing. Pens can have a red LED that comes on so cover it with something like a black sticker.
If it's a false alarm they turn it off again saving the battery for next time. If it's paydirt they keep recording, show you later at home, you visit as many of the other parents as possible to play them the file, tell them you NEED them to come to the next parent/teacher meeting, play the file on a projector/screen you quickly set up and/or even just a loud stereo so they can't whine and remove you… then ask everyone for a quick show of hands: "Who demands the teacher in this video be gone by Monday or we all agree to contact XYZ (some TV program) AND report the school board for defending and rewarding child abuse."
And/or get several recordings to establish a pattern THEN show everyone.
Personally, with all the woke agendas and toxic "teachers" in the education system today, plus the many other awful children in general having been 'parented" (brainwashed) by NetTicks, Disney Puss, etc more than their own parents who are too busy selfishly working two jobs to pay for all their toys, while government teaches your kids about their "rights" behind your back, even removing them and/or fining and/or gaoling you if you find out and dare to object to certain "mutilations" … anyone who doesn't homeschool, still sends their kids to their marxist indoctrination camps is not a real parent - they're either ignorant, foolish, or hate their kids.
Of course the kid in question could be the end result of all that same above nonsense. The kind of "special petal" now unable to deal with real life, in need of "safe spaces" with My Little Ponies or a puppy for therapy play because their widdle fweelings got ouchy when the nasty nazi teacher expected them to do work instead of talking about some empty-headed celebrity. It doesn't sound like this is the case, but…
Personally, with all the woke agendas and…..
Well, that was a quality crazy unhinged rant.
Solid 5/7…
All facts, all verifiable, and all happening. You have a crazy unhinged idea of what a crazy unhinged rant is.
Please verify what you've said.
All the best to you my friend 🙏
@Herbse: If you're interested look it up yourself. It's not like it's a secret. But I know by your posts you're 100% insincere. So I could post a mountain of information only to have you continue to scoff, excuse, deny. Why should I waste my time trying to save the willingly ignorant!
@[Deactivated]: Please pm me with some places where you get this info from.
I'm open minded to learning how people see things differently to others.
Found the type of person that buys into the culture wars rhetoric.
I once had a teacher in primary school absolutely lose their mind at a kid in my class. Full on mental break down. Told the poor kid nobody should sit with them at lunch.
Kid went straight to principal, never saw teacher (at our school at least) again. We had a temp from the next week onwards.
I find it hard to believe that if this happened, the teacher wouldn't have faced a similar fate quite quickly. Other kids talk and this kind of things becomes difficult to sweep under the rug. It's not in the school's interest to turn a blind eye to literal abuse.
I do acknowledge though that there can be mean, and bad, teachers and it's not unreasonable to feel extreme anxiety dealing with them. I can also imagine stressing out that nobody will understand and feeling the need to exaggerate - especially as a teenager.
It depends on the principal. That is the cold, hard truth.
I remember one teacher used to stamp her feet and yell "I'll come down on you like a ton of bricks." I found this especially amusing since she was quite fat, supposedly "glandular." I guess in current year you'd just call her a regular sized female.
Anyway, I managed to grow up trauma free, and I also developed a sense of humor.
Move class/school
Education standards board
Teachers registration board
School governance board
Google review
ombudsman
Foi
Make sure to get the facts straight and it’s worth the stress
Yelled and screamed?
Very luxurious this age
I remember the slippers, the belt, the hangers
The cane at school.
There are so many ppl talking BS.
As a parent, they know their kids better than anyone else. So if kid (not adolescent) complaints, there are very high chance the parent would make it out if it’s fake or real.
I really feel for all those who think teacher is just usual and kid’s making excuse.
The teacher can be racist. A paedophile; a narcissist and still be able to manipulate kids. So at any given time, as a parent, I would want to understand more for any complaints the kid makes. True or false, would listen to kid every (profanity) single time.
While kids shouldn't be automatically assumed to be lying, from my experience they can be experts at stretching the truth and manipulating their parents to get what they want. Sometimes they are not even aware they're doing it. I've experienced this from the other side of the situation several times in my career.
That being said, this could be a bad teacher, they certainly exist - but I would think that if it was as bad as the child is describing in this case, then more complaints and action would've been taken by now. If the OP is not happy with the response, they have the option to take it further or move/remove the child from the situation.
Edit: the teacher has an equal right to be believed as the student does. As many have said, this is not a one-sided situation.
Put a voice recorder in his bag. This needs evidence
Perhaps not evidence but proof that the child is telling the truth.
Yep that's what I meant.
Kid might need to toughen up and learn to act appropriately at school. Let’s be real, teachers don’t start yelling at kids for no reason - I was yelled at before and I was absolutely disturbing others - so 100% deserved. Did it suck at the time, sure. But did I learn from it, heck yes.
You’re not gonna be able to call up his employer in 15 years and complain they raised their voice at your kid - better to get these developmental issues sorted ASAP.
Hi OP, lots of terrible takes and advice on this thread. When behaviour from a teacher is concerning and causes serious distress to a young person, most states and territories have a "Reportable Conduct" scheme. This usually involves a formal complaints process at the school along with notification to an ombudsman. This takes the assessment of the risk away from a single individual (e.g. the principal) and ensures there is a transparent process of review.
My suggestion is to check the reportable conduct process in your state or territory and check if your concern meets the threshold. If your concerns do not (e.g. It is typically considered OK for a teacher to raise their voice to get the attention of a class), then it's better to try and work with your child to avoid that teacher and leave things in the past. However, if they do meet threshold (e.g. the actions caused significant emotional distress and were targeted) then initiate the process formally. If the school refuses, contact the ombudsman directly as they have a legal obligation to follow the process.
Yelling, abuse, coercion, monstering, are not appropriate tools for teachers. People who say "I was abused and turned out fine and therefore abuse is fine" have not in fact turned out fine.
I bet you're fun at parties
I don’t know why people downvoted you. This is the best comment in the thread.
Finally, a sensible response.
The teacher is probably yelling for a reason right?
Maybe little Timmy isn't the angel you think he is.
But honestly, there's not enough context to your story to give any real world advice.
Well it’s simple, you have to protect your kid. You put in writing to the principal a request that your kid be moved to another class or you remove your child from that school and send them somewhere else. You should be also able to lodge formal complaints with the department of education in your state.
If you've met with the principal and they are not willing to do anything, then you can of course escalate the matter to the next level up. Having said that, do you really want your kid to be at a school where the principal doesn't care that one of their own teachers is negatively affecting the mental health of the kids in their care?
All the comments here about kids being too soft nowadays and 'just tell him to toughen up and get over it' are completely unhelpful. Anyone who has suffered mental health issues or worked with those who have, would know this. You need to deal with the problem now, before it gets out of hand. If there is another class of the same grade your child could move to, do that. If not, then definitely seriously consider moving schools.
If you're noticing behavioral changes in your child, consider visiting your GP and get a referral for your child to see a psychologist.
I am with you. Most of the folks who comment here may not have kids, nor do they care about the kids' mental health. Wherever we are at the moment with all the "grooming" happening in churches coming out after 20 years is because of parents who wanted their kids to suck it up. As long as we parents let the bad behaviour of teachers go unnoticed, we support criminals. I genuinely don't care what others say, and I care about the system and mental health/future of my kid
Teachers are not the angels everyone makes them out to be. Just like the rest of the society there are good and bad people in the teaching profession as well. Also, my experience dealing with schools is that the principals always take side of the teachers. It is unfortunate, but it is true. You need your child not to suffer, then move him to a different school.
Who have you spoken to at the school? Other teachers? Year advisors? Counsellors? Executive? You should be getting everything in writing.
it comes from dictatorship handed down from government to parent to children from generation to generation.