[April Fools] Be Part of an Exclusive Club - Introducing OzBargain PREMIUM

scotty on 01/04/2019 - 04:10
Last edited 01/04/2019 - 15:05

Happy April Fool's Day!

It's 3PM AEDT and we are pulling the plug now. Yes OzBargain Premium is our April Fools Day joke for this year. Many who can spot it from miles away but it appears that some still fell for it.

See our April Fools post in 2018, 2017 #1, 2017 #2, 2016, 2015, 2014 and 2013.

OzBargain was started in 2006 as an extension of a hobby of mine — finding bargains and sharing them. Over the years this website and its community continues to grow, and I myself have also transitioned from running it as a side gig, to working for OzBargain full time, to employing a small team of community managers and developers. It has always been free for anyone to join, and even free for merchants to participate and share their offers. Today, however, marks a new milestone in the history of OzBargain. Let me introduce the new subscription based membership plans — OzBargain Premium.

OzBargain Premium

It is actually not something "new", but OzBargain Premium membership has indeed been around for a few years. It has been hinted many times on the site by some pre-alpha testers, and some of them might even pop in here today to share their reviews and experiences with Premium. What changed is that Premium is now available to ALL OzBargain users, starting from a small cost of šŸ”‹100/month, which is around a medium cup of Flat White (or 5 cups of 7-Eleven coffee). More about the new currency later. There will also be multiple levels of membership at different price point — Premium, Premium Plus and Premium Ultra — which would suit even the most hardcore OzBargainer and retail business.

So, what will you get from your Premium membership? Here are some highlights:

Premium Deals / Premium Competitions preview

This has got to be one of the most frequently requested ā€œfeatureā€ due to increasing popularity of OzBargain. Often by the time the deal gets on the home page it has already been ozbargained — either caused by out of stock or retailerā€™s web servers catching fire. We are now able to spot some these Premium deals in advance, and release them to the Premium members for up to 30 minutes before making them available to the general public. Premium members get to broden them first!

Preview Deals

Premium Lounge access

Premium members will have exclusive access to member-only forum, where they get to check out upcoming features, discuss the latest conspiracies and unlock other hidden OzBargain secrets. Not to mention the elitist feeling of exclusivity. Unfortunately we are not able disclose what has been discussed in the Premium Lounge, as first rule of Premium Lounge is — you do not talk about the Premium Lounge.

Premium Lounge

Limit increases

Too many people disagreeing with you and 5 comment -ve votes never enough? Worry not as Premium members can -ve vote 20 comments per 24 hours to shoot down those trolls! If you upgrade all the way to Premium Ultra, you will be empowered with unlimited -ve for comments — including those marked as Moderatorā€™s! There are other limit lifts, for example number of Classified, number of Store Rep deals, etc. Feel the power — get OzBargain Premium!

Rage Face Negative Votes

Premium support

Premium members also get Premium support from the moderators. As per our guidelines, consider yourself lucky if your TWAM is ever answered by a moderator within 24 hours (Monday to Friday only). However TWAM and support tickets from Premium members get special priority. Premium Ultra members can even dial 1800 OZBMODS to gain direct access to the moderation team to get your account issues resolved!

Dial a Moderator

Spammer Business friendly

Premium Ultra membership provides you unlimited potential to dump your rubbish onto other OzBargain users with unlimited Store Rep deals. OzBargain users donā€™t appreciate your offer and neg vote it? One click & itā€™s gone! What if your sockpuppet account accidentally got caught and sin-binned? Premium Ultra members just need to spend šŸ”‹1000 and it will be out of gaol in no time! Perfect for Business users — retailers, wholesalers, service providers or marketers.

But thatā€™s not all. You can see the full membership comparison on the OzBargain Premium page.

Premium Plans

šŸ”‹EneCoins

To subscribe to the OzBargain Premium membership you will need to pay with our new virtual currency — EneCoins. It was first announced on this very day 2 years ago, and then after much research and intense development, EneCoins has evolved into a virtual currency backed by crypto, blockchains and other hot buzzwords. Right now it can be used to pay OzBargain Premium subscription, or transfer between OzBargain members (for example paying for a Classified item). You can acquire EneCoins with Australian Dollar, starting from $4.99 for šŸ”‹100. Check out all the details at the EneCoins page.

Thatā€™s it — the new era of OzBargain. I will be answering questions regarding OzBargain Premium here today. Ask me anything.

Site Discussion April Fool's Day

Comments

  • [Deactivated] on 01/04/2019 - 04:49
    +54

    Congratulations TightBottom your premium membership number is 001

    • jimbobaus on 01/04/2019 - 06:36

      But my premium membership number is 001
      something is amiss me thinks

    • dasher86 on 01/04/2019 - 06:47
      +15

      I got 007. And the only relation to Bond I have is underwear.

      • Wystri Warrick on 01/04/2019 - 09:01
        +4

        I got 0014, because I'm twice as smart as bond.

    • cartman on 01/04/2019 - 09:54
      +12

      This sucks. Every time a special deal is posted you guys over east get plenty of time to access it. I just tried to sign up and it looks like it's already reached capacity. No love for late rising WA Ozbargainers :(

    • ronnknee on 01/04/2019 - 09:54
      +36

      Automatically remove jv's comments

      TAKE MY MONEY!!

      • Scrooge McDuck on 01/04/2019 - 10:55
        +1

        An excellent value proposition for even the lowest tier of Premium membership!

      • FireRunner on 01/04/2019 - 11:31
        +1

        I'm signing up for possibility of Christmas lunch on Scotty's Yacht

      • Miss B on 01/04/2019 - 13:14
        +1

        Unlimited negs, premium ultra for me.

      • frewer on 01/04/2019 - 18:40

        Are you trying to censoring free type ?

        Oh well it is jv

    • whooah1979 on 01/04/2019 - 06:39
      +2

      +1

      You got that right. 1st of April. April fools.

    • Pharos5 on 01/04/2019 - 07:03
      +32

      I think it's just a coincidence

    • Some Human on 01/04/2019 - 07:26
      +51

      Waiting for my premium membership to activate so I can neg this.

    • John on 01/04/2019 - 07:49
      +10

      Thats 1 out of 20 -ve vote quota from my Premium Membership for you, trolls!

      • Wystri Warrick on 01/04/2019 - 12:55
        +2

        I don't get why jaykay is being neged?

        • Kangal on 01/04/2019 - 13:58
          -6

          Because it's an OzBargain meme, we want to fool as many of the newcomers as possible.

          And it's fun.
          Come on, neg this post, and feel the adrenaline rush!!1!!

        • Blitzfx on 01/04/2019 - 13:59
          +5

          Ruining the prank / joke on unsuspecting members.

  • Yummy on 01/04/2019 - 04:53
    +34

    Unfortunately PalPay server is currently busy, possibly OzBargained. Please wait for a few moments before trying again.

    WTF?

    Stahp broden mah premum membahship!

    • JIMB0 on 01/04/2019 - 14:14
      +4

      Worked for me.

  • Jenny Death on 01/04/2019 - 05:20
    +6

    Friend, you had me until the crypto

    • M-G on 01/04/2019 - 08:48
      +1

      Same here, rather pay with normal currency rather than crypto.šŸ˜­

    • scotty on 01/04/2019 - 08:59
      +23

      The crypto-expert guy we talked to at that get-rich-quick conference the other day told us that it's the FUTURE!!1! That's why we hired him and implemented the new currency.

      • [Deactivated] on 01/04/2019 - 09:06
        +16

        I can't believe OzBargain has been monetized directly.

        This is the fault of capitalism and the two party system.

        I didn't vote for this. I didn't vote for any of this.

        I'll be making my complaint to the ACL.

        • Scrooge McDuck on 01/04/2019 - 10:33
          +9

          That's what you get for voting for Liberal or Labor!

          • [Deactivated] on 01/04/2019 - 10:34
            +2

            @Scrooge McDuck: This person gets it! Welcome to the club.

            I see you already have a hat.

        • Miss B on 01/04/2019 - 13:16
          +2

          Maybe if they'd gone to NRA for funding we wouldn't be in this situation.

      • Scrooge McDuck on 01/04/2019 - 10:50
        +5

        Great!! Now that those of us who are accustomed to a higher standard of living have finally been rewarded for our financial success, we have to share it with the new money riffraff.

        Oh happy day!!

        • whirlpool_guy on 01/04/2019 - 13:13
          +1

          Username checks out

          • Wystri Warrick on 01/04/2019 - 14:35

            @whirlpool_guy: I'll have you know that Scrooge Mcduck's username and avatar is irrelevant to his income. Why when he's at home he can't even afford cloths and only has a puny $59 phone :'(…

            • Scrooge McDuck on 01/04/2019 - 15:10
              +1

              @Wystri Warrick: I'll have you know that frugality is a lifestyle choice irrelevant to income. One doesn't become wealthy by bathing in Dom PĆ©rignon every night. And you clearly didn't read the annotation to my prior comment :P…

              • Wystri Warrick on 01/04/2019 - 17:05
                +1

                @Scrooge McDuck: 1+ for tightness.

                Oh I know I was just being silly messing around.
                Why buy a 2k phone when a $59 phone will do everything you need?
                I had a Huawei Y550 that cost $49, it did everything I needed except the camera, which is why I upgraded to Xiaomi A1 for the camera and for the larger screen.

                I'm frugal myself.
                Though I don't buy the cheapest, I buy the better value. For instance I wouldn't buy the cheaper/ist vehicle that's going to cost more in the long run, I'd buy the better value vehicle that'll cost less in the long run.

                I believe the the path to wealth is education and networking to be able to score that high paying job $$$.
                Then it's a matter of not blowing each paycheck on high yield investment vehicles etc. and watch the wealth compound!

      • jonathonsunshine on 01/04/2019 - 15:00

        The future is here already? Time flies…

  • TheOneWhoKnocks on 01/04/2019 - 05:25
    +21

    Very frustrating. Can you fix this PayPal issue? Been trying to purchase for hours now.

    • [Deactivated] on 01/04/2019 - 05:30
      +32

      Make sure you're using PalPay

    • whirlpool_guy on 01/04/2019 - 13:13

      Mate, it's PalPay!

  • hawkeye on 01/04/2019 - 05:49
    +16

    The 1800 numbers not working I'm trying to pay by card over the phone but this African guys telling me Scotty not here my computer got a virus I need to connect to his computer.

    • [Deactivated] on 01/04/2019 - 09:15
      +5

      Please. WE be Try Help you but I need computer to is connecting by the TeamVieewer. we be pikc by the Scotland to fix First YOuR internet.

  • franco cozzo on 01/04/2019 - 06:24
    +22

    …premium memberships now??? ffs…never thought ozb would stoop THIS LOW
    …might be time to delete my account.

    • [Deactivated] on 01/04/2019 - 08:42
      +7

      He's taking his idle income and giving it an upgrade using his blind followers.

      April fools and all that good shit

    • ronnknee on 01/04/2019 - 08:50
      -2

      Whoosh.

      • franco cozzo on 01/04/2019 - 09:10
        +16

        …Whoosh

        • [Deactivated] on 01/04/2019 - 09:20

          Triple whoosh.

        • magic8ballgag on 01/04/2019 - 10:17

          Nice save.

      • Kawaii on 01/04/2019 - 14:26
        +1

        Quadra Whoosh!!!!

  • SBOB on 01/04/2019 - 06:27
    +14

    I'd want this just for the ability to neg stupid posts more than 5 times a day ;)

    Sign me up Scotty ;)

    • magic8ballgag on 01/04/2019 - 10:17
      +1

      I'd pay for this feature alone!

      • Scrooge McDuck on 01/04/2019 - 10:36

        Unfortunately the much requested ability to neg forum topics hasn't been implemented. Disappointed!

    • djones145 on 01/04/2019 - 14:00

      you mean "ability to nag jv's post more than 5 times a day"

  • jimbobaus on 01/04/2019 - 06:37
    +9

    Waiting on Diji to chime in with how voting for Labour or Liberal governments is why this has happened.

    • [Deactivated] on 01/04/2019 - 09:29
      +5

      You know, he does seem very enlightened and I'm starting to see how the two major parties and the big corporates are in cahoots.

      It's actually no surprise really.

      Only mindless drones cannot see it.

      • jimbobaus on 01/04/2019 - 09:55
        +2

        funniest thing i have read on the internet today :)

  • jjjaar on 01/04/2019 - 06:41
    +2

    Still canā€™t buy EneCoins! Waiting patiently for it to come back up… =)

    • jimbobaus on 01/04/2019 - 06:42
      +1

      Think PalPay is broken ā€¦.. :(

      • jjjaar on 01/04/2019 - 06:43
        +4

        Might have to start a new thread on here asking for PalPay help rather than googling šŸ˜‚

        • jimbobaus on 01/04/2019 - 06:43
          +4

          yeah i have always found asking OzB for help is far more efficient than Google.

          • chriise on 01/04/2019 - 09:24

            @jimbobaus: Is that what your lawyer/insurer/bank said before you came here?

    • snackerjoe on 01/04/2019 - 08:59
      +1

      Needs more Eneloops to charge maybe…

  • alvian on 01/04/2019 - 06:43
    +9

    Premium members need free shipping benefits. Please make it happen scotty.

    + Delivery (Free with OzB Premium)

  • jasong on 01/04/2019 - 06:46
    +2

    Can someone help me setup an EneWallet?

  • Some Human on 01/04/2019 - 06:49
    +14

    Thanks OP, got 10.

    • Morphine on 01/04/2019 - 12:40
      +1

      Save some for the rest of us … jeeeeeeez.

  • dasher86 on 01/04/2019 - 06:52
    +5

    Any other user having trouble with Lounge Access? I tried to dial 1800 OZB MODS but my Ultra account doesn't get activated for 2 business days.
    I'm only able to read not comment. FFS.

    • scotty on 01/04/2019 - 07:12
      +7

      As a Premium member (notice the stars next to your username), you should already have access to the Premium Lounge. It might be the technical issue again due to big influx of Premium members since this announcement. 1800 number only works if you are already an Ultra member. Maybe you need to pay for it with your EneCoins first?

      • parisienne on 01/04/2019 - 07:45
        +1

        Can i ask,in the true spirit of Ozbargain…where do you put the AFD2019 code to activate the freebie ?

        • scotty on 01/04/2019 - 07:49
          +9

          On the PalPay payment page obviously. Have you got to that stage yet?

          • parisienne on 01/04/2019 - 08:24
            -1

            @scotty: Ummmm,no….not yet.

          • Seedy seed on 01/04/2019 - 14:29
            -4

            @scotty: Just wanted to say i feel this years april fool was abit crappy compared to prev ones

  • Tyrx on 01/04/2019 - 06:58
    +2

    Craig Wright is the true creator of EneCoins, and scotty is simply an imposter.

  • loulou1 on 01/04/2019 - 06:59
    +11

    Part of the fun of premium was knowing how exclusive it was, if you are just going to let anyone buy their way in I no longer want to be a part of it.

    • [Deactivated] on 01/04/2019 - 10:33
      +2

      You're so elitist it's offensive.

    • Scrooge McDuck on 01/04/2019 - 11:02

      <platinum>
      Not to worry old boy, there's still the hidden Platinum tier Premium membership.
      </platinum>

      • loulou1 on 01/04/2019 - 11:44

        Wow, leaving ozbargain premium means i also have to get a gender change???? I should have read the terms and conditions thoroughly rather than just ticking the 'i agree' box

        • Scrooge McDuck on 01/04/2019 - 12:08

          Sorry, absolutely positively NO GURLS ALOUD! in The He-Man Womun Haters Club Premium Platinum.

      • scotty on 01/04/2019 - 12:22
        +6

        Sorry your Platinum membership has been terminated. You know the rules concerning talking about Platinum on public forums…

        • Scrooge McDuck on 01/04/2019 - 14:59

          …Platinum membership…

          …talking about Platinum…

          You were saying?

          It seems the hidden text tags aren't working today. Possibly related to the PalPay server being overloaded.

        • loulou1 on 01/04/2019 - 18:14

          You canā€™t kick me out, I left!

  • kevkay on 01/04/2019 - 07:03

    c'mon dudes, just a maybe for the xmas lunch with the mods on scotty's boat?! That's the only reason i'll get Premium Ultra!

  • sparkles on 01/04/2019 - 07:03
    +5

    Yay! About time! Like all the best things in life, premium users will now be able to pay to be separated from the peasants. Woot! All the unwashed masses really ruin it for everyone, especially when there are cheap deals on Quilton.

  • donamique on 01/04/2019 - 07:10
    +3

    Would you accept iTunes gift cards?

    • scotty on 01/04/2019 - 07:18
      +14

      Only from our iOS app, but you need to be an OzBargain Premium Plus member first before you can access that. Note that Premium (non-plus) can only access Windows Mobile or Nokia Series-40 apps.

      • RockyRaccoon on 01/04/2019 - 07:40
        +3

        Typical iOS bias by our resident DOS programmer. Scotty still thinks WYSIWYG and Mice are passing fads let alone šŸ˜€ :-)

        • scotty on 01/04/2019 - 07:52
          +10

          I have to literally [Ctrl]-[Alt]-[Del] our PalPay gateway server a few times this morning, and then run

          c:\> paypal.exe

          to get it going, but still ozbargained at the moment.

          • RockyRaccoon on 01/04/2019 - 08:56
            +3

            @scotty: Maybe if you try

            C:\> palpay.exe

            You might be able to get it going

            But I am just šŸ“±user so I might be wrong šŸ˜€

            • dlovep on 01/04/2019 - 09:31
              +2

              @RockyRaccoon: Nah you need the parameters:

              /Q for Quick access
              /W for Wife login
              /S for Second account
              /T for Third account
              /F for making Farting sound

              e.g. C:\>palpay.exe /W /T /F
              you know what I mean ~~

            • scotty on 01/04/2019 - 10:25

              @RockyRaccoon: Yes you are absolutely right. However somehow it got stuck with that 640kb limit when the requests come in. Hmmm need all those config.ini bootstrap options for extended & expanded memory.

              • ssquid on 01/04/2019 - 12:27
                +1

                @scotty: "config.ini"? I'm starting to doubt your credibility.

  • ascotno1 on 01/04/2019 - 07:16
    +9

    Yes I think it's April Fool's Day.

    • Some Human on 01/04/2019 - 16:51
      +1

      What's that got to do with this thread?

  • pyramid on 01/04/2019 - 07:16
    +8

    Reported - affiliate/Referral on 1st April

  • bxpressiv on 01/04/2019 - 07:25
    +6

    Sweet, all levels of premium accounts remove jv's comments, where do I sign up?

    Also @Scotty, I think you got ripped off and got some knock off cars, on the EneCoins page you mention your fleet of Ludicrous Telstra Model S cars. Awkward!

    • ssquid on 01/04/2019 - 16:23
      +1

      Likely a typo.
      Everyone knows the highly economical Ford Telstar is the ozbargainer's vehicle of choice.

    • frewer on 03/04/2019 - 13:38

      Time to buy EneCoins, crypto market just turn BULLISH !!!

  • iforgotmysocks on 01/04/2019 - 07:29
    +1

    Can premium membership bail out others in the penalty box? I miss PJC

    • dasher86 on 01/04/2019 - 07:47
      +2

      PJC could buy premium membership and get out of jail.

    • [Deactivated] on 01/04/2019 - 11:48

      No.

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