R U OK OzBargainers? (2018)

neil on 12/09/2018 - 16:57
Last edited 13/09/2018 - 00:32 by 1 other user

R U OK?

R U OK? Day is an annual day in September (today, 13/9) dedicated to remind people to ask family, friends and colleagues the question, "R U OK?", in a meaningful way, because connecting regularly and meaningfully is one thing everyone can do to make a difference and even save lives.

We do this every year and it's good to see R U OK? Day doing events all year round and not just September 13. So have these conversations today, next week, next month and throughout the year.

Hot Tip: Medicare provides for 10 free (or subsidised) sessions with a psychologist after a referral from a GP. It's free/cheap so you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

Most mental health issues are very much treatable with professional help. Trouble is that most of us are too scared, embarrassed, or lack self awareness to seek professional help. If you have a broken foot, most people will have no hesitation in seeking a doctor because we know it can be fixed but for mental health issues (which can be just as well treated) we quietly carry on even though the pain and harm may be 1000 times worse. (credit: Bluberry)

The comments and PMs we received last year are part of why we are proud to support R U OK? Day by changing our colours and promoting their cause.

One of the biggest challenges to OzBargain and other online social media sites (e.g. Instagram, Twitter) is promoting an environment where everyone feels comfortable commenting and discussing issues (or deals). We should all recognise that our comments have consequences both positive and negative. People don't participate on a discussion site to be attacked or bullied. While some people may say 'suck it up' and that people should not be so sensitive, we should be aware that we don't truly know the people behind these accounts. Some are young, some may come to here to escape a tough reality, be mentally unbalanced, or they possibly could have thick skin. We just don't know.

On the flip side, a simple gesture such as thanking someone or sending a friendly PM can go a long way. At the beginning of last year, we made a post about contributing to a more positive OzBargain environment and we've had some great results changing some users behaviour by thinking about the impacts of their words.

Ask family, friends and colleagues how they are doing but don't forget to ask your family of OzBargainers how they are doing and not just today. We have forums where you can discuss relationships or anything else off-topic. Also, if you see any comments where you think the person may be struggling, please report to us and we'll get in touch.

You can also feel free to chat with us in the private Talk with a Moderator forum if you have any OzBargain related issues. Or send me a PM about whatever you want (except moderation issues). Please see our Mental Health Page if you need to speak to someone including live chat.

For confidential advice and support call a crisis support line – such as Lifeline on 13 11 14 or Suicide Call Back Service on 1300 659 467.

:)

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Comments

    • Scab on 13/09/2018 - 12:03
      -5

      You need to do an Ozbargain one.

      Neil's RU OK Ozbargain Flowchart:

      RU OK

      No, just missed a Domino's deal.

      Don't worry, we have all the latest codes on our pizza deal page.

      RU OK now.

      Yes, yes I am, thank you Neil.

    • Zedsdeadbabyzedsdead on 13/09/2018 - 21:50

      Thanks Neil:) Great work from the Ozbargain team.

  • j4ck on 13/09/2018 - 11:30
    +3

    I'm not okay because it feels like everyone hates me every time there's an eBay sale :(

    • Scab on 13/09/2018 - 12:07
      +3

      I know it's not easy but stop jacking.

      • j4ck on 13/09/2018 - 12:35
        +1

        I promise that I'll try.

        • Scab on 13/09/2018 - 12:46
          +1

          Sure you will.

  • field1985 on 13/09/2018 - 11:37
    +10

    No.

    Our entire division at work is under a wage freeze and the federal government have lowered the HECS/HELP threshold to $45k.

    So my take already paltry home pay is actually going to decrease. Despite my workload/responsibilities continually increasing.

    There is little to no hope of career progression. There are still people in their mid 70's (and claiming part pensions) occupying positions in our office.

    The is no hope of ever owning a home. Baby boomers have completely screwed our generation through NG/CGT, for their benefit.

    It is quite an achievement of the baby boomers to be the most prosperous generation in human history, but also the only generation to leave their kids worse off. But nah, its the kids fault for eating "smashed avo".

    So yeah, pretty depressed/disillusioned right now.

    • Pizdets on 13/09/2018 - 12:41
      +1

      You need to get out of Federal Government. I was there for about 11 years then got out.

    • HighAndDry on 13/09/2018 - 13:50
      -1

      The is no hope of ever owning a home. Baby boomers have completely screwed our generation through NG/CGT, for their benefit.

      Mindset is everything. You'll find life will feel a lot better if you are less negative, and if you stop blaming others (even if they're to blame) and focus on what you can do to change your situation.

      • Pantagonist on 13/09/2018 - 15:07
        +1

        We should all recognise that our comments have consequences both positive and negative.

        HighAndDry responds:

        Yeah I should probably keep this in mind more.

        16 minutes later, the above post.

        R U OK HighAndDry?

        • HighAndDry on 13/09/2018 - 15:11

          Hey! That was me trying to be positive! I even said - "even if they're to blame". It's the empowerment mentality, when we feel powerless, it has bad physiological effects on our bodies. Conversely when we feel in control, it's better for us both psychologically and physiologically.

          And a lot of that is in framing, perspective and mentality. I'll give a personal example:

          I had a stretch where I just couldn't find another job, no matter what I did. I'm not white, in an industry that's so white bleach would stain it. It'd be utterly trivial - and not even incorrect - to blame race and subconscious racism (or at least racial factors which have the same effect) for what I was going through. But instead you take a "(profanity) this, I'm better than this" attitude and I just basically talked to 3x as many recruiters and eventually it worked out.

          Would it have been easier for me if I were white? Absolutely. Can I pull a Michael Jackson convincingly? No. So it's a moot point and far better to focus on what you can control as opposed to blaming factors that you can't.

        • Pantagonist on 13/09/2018 - 15:32
          +3

          @HighAndDry: Relate what you said back to the person who you responded to.

          Regarding house prices, it's not like you can just "self-belief" your way into the market. If you don't have enough money, you don't get to play. If you aren't skilled enough to earn the money required to buy a house, you don't get to play. You may work a job that contributes greatly towards society working smoothly (e.g. nurse, childcare worker, teacher), but because of the monetary worth that is attributed to those jobs, you don't get to play.

          It's a fair way away from the challenge of finding someone who'll give a non-white person a job in Australia.

          I say this as someone who bought a $5000 block of land in the middle of nowhere a while back so that I know that I have an option of a place to exist and escape this mad sickness that seems to pass for society at present.

        • HighAndDry on 13/09/2018 - 15:43

          @Nomadesque:

          Regarding house prices, it's not like you can just "self-belief" your way into the market. If you don't have enough money, you don't get to play. If you aren't skilled enough to earn the money required to earn enough money, you don't get to play.

          It's literally the same issue. I didn't want a new job because of work-life balance or anything like that, I wanted a new job for more money. More money = can afford more expensive properties.

          OR lower standards so that they're not looking only at properties within X kms of the city, but X+N kms of the city.

        • Pantagonist on 13/09/2018 - 15:54
          +1

          @HighAndDry:

          It's literally the same issue.

          If you have a job and want a better paying job, that's a fair way from not owning a house and wanting to own a house. It's more like owning a house already but wanting to own a better house.

          OR lower standards so that they're not looking only at properties within X kms of the city, but X+N kms of the city.

          You do understand that there are plenty of people who can't even get up on the bottom rung of the ladder (which, for argument's sake, is probably $300,000, very generously), in that no bank will lend them that amount of money? Distance from the city isn't even a factor.

        • HighAndDry on 13/09/2018 - 16:08

          @Nomadesque:

          If you have a job and want a better paying job, that's a fair way from not owning a house and wanting to own a house. It's more like owning a house already but wanting to own a better house.

          No, I'm not saying it's an analogy. I'm saying it is literally the same issue - if the issue is that they don't make enough to afford the property they want, getting a better job will help with that.

          in that no bank will lend them that amount of money? Distance from the city isn't even a factor.

          A new/better job will also help with that. Income directly correlates to borrowing power, other factors like previous bankruptcies etc notwithstanding.

          Look, at the end of the day, it's "Do what you can about it", or "Wallow". My view is that I don't believe wallowing to be particularly effective, so I choose, and advocate, "Go do what you can about it." It's basically "Have a positive mentality" vs "have a negative mentality". It shouldn't even be an argument which is better here.

        • HighAndDry on 13/09/2018 - 16:13

          @Nomadesque: I mean seriously, I'm effectively saying: "Be positive" and you're saying "No."

          Why?

        • Pantagonist on 13/09/2018 - 21:20
          +1

          @HighAndDry: Please don't verbal me.

          I'm merely pointing out that having a postive attitude is not the answer to all of life's problems.

          In your initial post you said "mindset is everything", which I'm saying is not always the case and won't always deliver what you want when there are significant structural barriers in the way.

          Then there are the knock-on effects of life events early in life that you have no control over.

          Maybe the main breadwinner in your family died unexpectedly, then you needed to drop out of school early to work and help support your other parent and siblings. Dropping out meant that you didn't get the education required for a high paying job. Then you had a kid which meant that you weren't able to take time off to finish your education / get better qualifications. You then end up renting and get a stable job with a steady income, but find that rental prices are squeezing your stagnant wages and you can't get off the roundabout.

          Fortunately HighAndDry is there with some helpful advice to win at life when you complain about Australian government policies; pull yourself up by the bootstraps and stop that stinking thinking!

        • HighAndDry on 14/09/2018 - 01:32

          @Nomadesque: Positivity might not solve all your problems but it sure as hell will do more than complaining, which seems to be your solution.

          Also, wtf is 'verballing'? Since when was that a verb? What's with you people and making up words?

        • Pantagonist on 14/09/2018 - 07:03

          @HighAndDry: What you seem to regard as negative thinking or complaining is actually more like critical thinking.

          Again, you seem to assume to know a lot about what my approach to life is and what my solutions to problems are without knowing anything about me.

          It's pretty clear from your responses in this thread that you view anyone who doesn't fit your definition of "positive" is a no hoper whose problems all stem from their own choices. That's fine for you to hold those views, but perhaps in future you could choose a better day than R U OK day to share them with the world? It's a day for listening and conversing (helpful), not telling people that they're not positive enough (unhelpful).

          The word verballing has a history of use in Australia. It's a legitimate and generally understood term here, meaning to misrepresent a person's position by purporting to paraphrase what they originally said but changing the intent. I'm really not sure what you mean by "you people"?

      • field1985 on 13/09/2018 - 15:10
        +1

        "focus on what you can do to change your situation."

        Funny, because that's exactly what my generation has been doing. No matter what we do, the ladders (education/employment/healthcare/housing) used to climb out of our "situation" have all been pulled up behind the baby boomers.

        Meanwhile we have to pay baby boomers 20+ years of retirement pensions, while simultaneously funding our own retirements through Super, whilst simultaneously paying of education debts they imposed on use, while simultaneously trying to save a house deposit for the property market they've cooked.

        The boomers also kept the retirement age low, despite benefiting from increased life expectancy. Now are trying to raise the pension age, but only after they have benefited.

        No offence, but I will blame the baby boomers for destroying the egalitarian nature of Australian society to the grave. The harm they have done will take generations to recover from.

        • HighAndDry on 13/09/2018 - 16:09

          Funny, because that's exactly what my generation has been doing.

          I'm IN YOUR GENERATION.

          No offence, but I will blame the baby boomers for destroying the egalitarian nature of Australian society to the grave.

          I'm not offended, that's perfectly your prerogative. It kinda just means you'll be miserable till the grave, which is what I'm trying to get people to avoid.

    • realfancyman on 13/09/2018 - 14:53

      What qualifications do you have?

    • Thaal Sinestro on 13/09/2018 - 23:54
      -1

      Socialism is the answer to all your woes. Confiscate wealth from the rich and redistribute it to the poor. We poor greatly outnumber the rich, so why do we continue to let them fleece us? We have been brainwashed to believe that laissez faire capitalism benefits all of us, but in truth it only benefits the "upper end of town".

      • peterpeterpumpkin on 14/09/2018 - 08:37

        When the ratio of the human population to available resources hits a certain threshold, to avoid anarchy it's hard to imagine an "ethical" system without socialist influences. But ironically, technology, rather than being a saviour, might give existing oligarchical systems enough power to suppress change. If you completely control surveillance, communication channels, freedom of movement and the supply chain, you reduce the risk of an uprising.

        But the truth is that many people would hate the idea of living in a "fair world" outside their immediate space. When a fifth or more of Bangladesh gets buried under water I don't imagine many Australians will be picking up their hands to absorb 30 million refugees. Or if technology can't overcome the effects of a devastating drought sometime in the future, I don't know if the Siberians will accept us.

        The new left has also scared off many traditional socialists. What used to be a movement of anti-nationalism, anti-religion and anti-race has now become a champion of defining differences. The multicultural by-products of colonialism and their members are automatically seen as evil and the world must do it's best to preserve the borders and identities that would have existed in the absence of Western imperialism. So now anyone that appears "bullied" to conform in the modern world is seen as a shining beacon. It doesn't matter that North Korea is renowned for its ethnic nationalism and xenophobic policies (e.g. North Korea forces its women to abort mixed "race" babies), since they are the "victims".

  • syousef on 13/09/2018 - 11:37
    -2

    Given the rampant bullying that is permitted to go on here this is a complete and utter joke.

    • Max Power on 13/09/2018 - 14:12
      +1

      I know how you feel. I do believe the moderators are doing the best they can, but they can't catch everything. They've always resolved issues I have pointed out.
      Unfortunately, some people miss the point of "R U OK? Day". They think it's the one and only day of the year they have to think about others feelings.
      I figure you can't control how people behave, but you can set a good example and hope others will follow.

      • Homr on 13/09/2018 - 14:50
        +1

        Shouldn't everyday be R U OK day?

        Just like Valentines Day, you don't need that 1 particular day to show your love to your significant other? Also applies to Mother's day and Father's day.

      • Wystri Warrick on 13/09/2018 - 15:42

        +1 (ran out of votes).

  • mehow on 13/09/2018 - 12:00
    +9

    Great initiative. Past 3 years have been hell for me. Hostile divorce, financial raped in family court, lost family and children, giving up work to be a full time carer to a terminal ill parent and now being dragged through the courts by a close relative over money and spite. First time I've had to deal with all this stress and understand the importance of mental health.

    • Scab on 13/09/2018 - 13:36
      -1

      financial raped in family court

      Was that in one go or installments?

      • mehow on 13/09/2018 - 13:51

        All in one hit. Solicitor fees and large proportion of asset pool that belonged to me. Put me behind at least 10 years both financially and mentality.

    • HighAndDry on 13/09/2018 - 13:53

      Damn that sounds rough. Even without knowing the details - yeah Family Court tries but often fails to really get to any fair outcome. Hang in there friend, there is a light at the end of the tunnel, and no, it's not a train.

  • Homr on 13/09/2018 - 12:19

    So how do I participate in this great cause? Can I just sms everyone on my phone "RU OK"?

    • neil on 13/09/2018 - 12:41

      SMSing may spark the conversation but better if you can speak to the person in-person. See if they want to catch up for a coffee.

      • Homr on 13/09/2018 - 12:43

        Sure

    • HighAndDry on 13/09/2018 - 13:53

      You can but I wouldn't. Not because it's not likely to be effective, but I honestly couldn't handle trying to talk to everyone on my contacts list at the same time.

  • bdl on 13/09/2018 - 12:43
    -2

    R U TA?

  • GregRust on 13/09/2018 - 13:20

    Better than I was last time around.

  • HunterxHunter9000 on 13/09/2018 - 13:23
    +2

    I am not okay, I feel that life is boring and revolves around work, eat, sleep, everyday is same, people criticise you for not looking for better work while others criticise you for being fat, I know I am and I want to lose it, so why do you keep reminding me and putting me in a cycle of depression. why don't you leave me alone, I can deal with my own shit, don't put in something that isn't your business, I get that you care but don't repeat it 100 times a day every day, do you know this shit leads to suicide?!

    Sorry just had to throw this in here, at least I can let my feelings out somewhere.

    • Homr on 13/09/2018 - 13:27
      +1

      "work, eat, sleep, everyday is same, "

      Start your own business, become an entrepreneur.

      "while others criticise you for being fat, I know I am and I want to lose it,"

      Hit the gym? Not only it will make you look better but it builds confidence aswell. I did and I'm looking forward to summer and heading to the beach.

      • HighAndDry on 13/09/2018 - 13:35
        +3

        Gym makes me feel more energized too - it's a great positive cycle. Hit the gym, have more energy, keep hitting the gym.

        • dane45 on 13/09/2018 - 14:24
          +2

          +1 for the gym! Although if you're anything like I was, you might find it intimidating especially if you don't know where to start.

          If you're looking to lose weight, you may want to speak with your GP about referring you to a dietitian and exercise physiologist to get you on the right track. If that's not an option financially, a PT may be a better fit (although check their qualifications) or even just group exercise classes.

          That feeling of "work, eat, sleep, everyday is same" is one that a lot of people fall into, which is why it's important to make time for the things that you enjoy. If you want to experience something new you may want to consider travelling, or learning a new skill or hobby (taking a language class for example).

          I say all this without knowing anything about your situation of course, but I hope it helps :)

        • Homr on 13/09/2018 - 14:41
          +2

          @dane45: Further to this

          Gym is actually hard to begin with, that's why you need to start small. If you can only handle 15mins then just do bloody 15mins and go home. But come again the next day and do another 15mins, and another and another until you can do 20mins! Then 20mins will become 25, then 30, then 35. It's all about getting the routine and habit to start of with and the rest will sort itself out.

          Have a merry RU OK day!

      • realfancyman on 13/09/2018 - 14:56
        +2

        And if you can't afford a gym membership, maybe try an outdoor gym with other exercises

        • Homr on 13/09/2018 - 15:01
          +2

          Yes and there are plenty of fat burning / strength building exercises you can do at home easily.

          Google some personal trainers instagrams for some inspiration.

    • Bargainhunter83 on 13/09/2018 - 16:47
      +1

      I can understand what you must be going through. Feels like a never ending cycle. But now that the weather is improving try to do some outdoor activities. Get some sun. Socialise. When i was going through a similar struggle both with the continuos cycle and weight issues i asked my best friend to motivate me. She helped me get out. Go for walks, to the park, joined an exercise group together. Stopped drinking (not that i had a drinking porblem but i compleletly cut it out) and i was feeling better in a matter of days. I had many people give advise about loosing weight..but i did not pay much attemtion to that. Where i am from people have always jugded me for becoming fat. But focusing on getting stronger motivated me more than focusing on weight loss. And its true even a 30minute walk can help you improve your mood. Many positive benefits of physical activity..cld be anything..dancing,walking,exploring new places.. I enjoyed following dance/exercise videos on youtube..Wish you all the very best. Hope you can break your cycle.

    • HunterxHunter9000 on 13/09/2018 - 22:49
      +2

      Thank You all for the positive comments, I will start workouts at home and gradually build up to going to gym, I used to go and lose a lot of weight but work, eat, sleep made me soo tired I had to stop the gym but I will work up to making time to go even if its 15 min after work or before.

      • quaddie on 14/09/2018 - 11:03

        Track everything you eat using MyFitnessPal.

        Don't eat processed or take out crap. Cook your own food.

        Start moving more - go for a walk the weather is getting nicer.

        Keep doing this and you will succeed.

  • HighAndDry on 13/09/2018 - 13:34

    We should all recognise that our comments have consequences both positive and negative.

    Yeah I should probably keep this in mind more.

  • Bunnyburger on 13/09/2018 - 13:47
    +1

    I'm not ok. Not today anyway. So much nerve pain. I've done all I can and should short of surgery. I've said I'm in pain before but people think I'm exaggerating because I've worked so hard to regain and retain my functionality instead of lying down and rotting.

    • HighAndDry on 13/09/2018 - 13:54
      +1

      Good on you for persevering and not giving up. It's okay to take it easy now and then, so long as you keep your long-term goals in mind.

      • Bunnyburger on 13/09/2018 - 20:12
        +1

        Thanks I'll keep my eyes on the prize. I didn't skip out on working out today.

    • paraneoplastic on 13/09/2018 - 18:29

      What kind of Op did you have?

      you weren't prescribed gapapentin (Lyrica) ?

      • Bunnyburger on 13/09/2018 - 20:11
        +1

        I didn't have any operations. I was given a 7/10 rate of success and a 1/10 chance of failure after recovery. The odds didn't look good. I was prescribed lyrica, I told the neurologist it was causing me to binge eat, he said "well stop eating". At that time I had already reduced my BMI to 23 and had maintained that for the last four years (this year is the fifth meaning I beat the 95% of failed diets), I wanted to punch him in the face.

  • withoutasound on 13/09/2018 - 13:55
    +3

    At work, no one asks as they know that I am not OK so don’t want to deal with it if they ask me. Yesterday I was not ok and tomorrow I won’t be ok. This day just doesn’t mean anything.

  • AliensStoleMyMoney on 13/09/2018 - 14:03
    +3

    lost someone 2 years ago after they were being judged/hassled on R U OK day try to be a little compassionate guys

    • Homr on 13/09/2018 - 14:37

      Username checks out

    • realfancyman on 13/09/2018 - 14:58
      +3

      Very important that you don't do it just to tick off your "good deed for the day" and you actually care. Depressed people don't want to be used to make you feel good about yourself.

  • shortgum on 13/09/2018 - 14:10

    No, life has serve little purpose

    • mezje on 13/09/2018 - 14:57
      +2

      Nobody's life has one single purpose. We find purpose in everyday interactions with one another. Speak with others, interact with the world around you, you will find purpose.

      Think about what you enjoy, what you're good at, set goals to improve or do more of these things.

  • mezje on 13/09/2018 - 14:55
    +8

    I am OK now, apart from a broken collarbone! But 3 years ago I certainly wasn't.

    Outed, kicked out, lived in shitty 12 person share house, failed 2 units at uni, my cat died, all in a year. I kept on trucking got a better job, focused on study more, got out of hell hole share house and reconciled with my Dad (only family member I remain in contact with).

    If you are in the dumps there are things you can do to change it, it's hard and talking things out does help, even if it is brief interactions like the ones here and other forums.

    Speak with people, figure out what makes you most upset and work to change them one at a time - things will get better. What started a lot of this change was me actually calling the Kids Help Line who then told me to go see some sort of counselor. Uni offered X sessions free and all it took was 1 with me letting everything out to get the ball rolling.

    • realfancyman on 13/09/2018 - 14:59
      +3

      very inspiring, well done.

  • Topdog on 13/09/2018 - 16:03
    +1

    God i hate this day

  • playswithfire on 13/09/2018 - 16:07
    +5

    Thanks for asking.

    No I'm not really OK, but I have to be for my wife and daughters. Wife is not ok and in hospital. One daughter is not ok and living with my sister. Other daughter still lives with me, but has her own issues.

    Shit sucks.

  • Saeed on 13/09/2018 - 16:48

    All good, thanks for asking!

  • vicosads on 13/09/2018 - 17:03
    +3

    A day when people pretend to care about others… Zzzzzzzzzzz

    • Homr on 13/09/2018 - 17:11

      ^^winner!

    • Scab on 13/09/2018 - 17:29

      No, I think that's Valentine's?

  • pennypincher98 on 13/09/2018 - 18:14
    +2

    Well not really, but no-one will care tomorrow if I'm ok or not so I'll just keep chugging along.

    • PJC on 04/10/2018 - 12:01
      +1

      Don't ever stop chugging along.

  • Most Wanted on 13/09/2018 - 18:25
    +2

    No, I'm mentally insane after doing three pre-apprenticeships, 1 first year slave labor apprenticeship down in pinjarra, and tons of courses, and 1 year no job then 2 years no job, and now 1 year no job.

  • Lockieasy on 13/09/2018 - 19:53
    +2

    I'm doing better than last year.

    Work has picked up and I'm actually going to be able to buy a house/unit this year thanks to some inheritance and falling house prices. Then I'm going to travel overseas next year and I suppose start the dating game again…

  • Flanders on 13/09/2018 - 22:44
    +1

    Im okely dokely ;)

  • skywards on 13/09/2018 - 22:49
    +1

    Hmmm if it wasn’t for my obligation to my awesome boss, l’ll be committed to my self imposed exile to deal with some serious personal stuff. I really wished I was ok but it’ll be a long slog til I get there.

    • Wystri Warrick on 13/09/2018 - 23:31

      What's happening skywards, anything you'd like to talk about?

      • skywards on 14/09/2018 - 19:06
        +1

        I’m err going through a divorce and I hope to god it will go smoothly.

        • Wystri Warrick on 14/09/2018 - 21:52

          That's rough, can't Imagen how you must be feeling :(.
          If you want to talk about it more I'm always on Ozbargain.

  • Wystri Warrick on 13/09/2018 - 23:25
    +3

    I had just enrolled at TAFE to study IT.
    Due to mental health, other issues and other stuff I dropped out and spent the next 6 months getting back up.

    I decided I'd go back to school and complete my SACE (year 11 & 12), and decide what I want to do with my life.
    I didn't want to do IT, I had lost interest in it a few years prior and wanting to go into a field that doesn't change so rapidly (less stress).

    During the time that I was down I tried to find some meaning to life, some purpose, I read a bit about existentialism and nihilism, that didn't help.
    I found there is no meaning to life, no purpose and no point, if there is anything in/to life it's the social connections that we make.

    My life hasn't turned out the way I thought when I was younger and I'm single, no car or licence and currently unemployed.
    Mid to late last year I began drinking quite heavily, OCD and I have a lot of memories rolling around in my head.

    What helped me:
    Getting professional help
    Removed/distanced myself from the negative aspects of my life
    Supportive people
    Making friends/socialising
    Setting realistic goals
    Music
    Keeping busy
    Treating myself (Bon Jovi and Julio Iglesias concerts).
    And time.

    • bluesky on 14/09/2018 - 15:47
      +1

      I read a bit about existentialism and nihilism, that didn't help.

      Try Stoicism - it could be helpful. After all, therapies like Cognitive Behaviour Therapy, is influenced by Stoic philosophy.

      Plenty of material you can google, but some intro stuff here :

      The philosophy of Stoicism
      Stoicism 101
      The Antidote : Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking

      Glad that you are getting better, I was one who felt in my teenage years, that existence was meaningless. And a slow and arduous climb to normality.

      • Wystri Warrick on 14/09/2018 - 21:46
        +1

        Hey there bluesky how are you :).

        Thanks for the info and links I'll check them out.

        Hope you're traveling well now :).

        • bluesky on 14/09/2018 - 23:38
          +1

          Thanks WW, I am travelling pretty well now – after ditching conventional norms, and embracing a kinder, gentler philosophy on life and career.
          All the best to you on your journey as well :-)

  • kaleidoscope on 14/09/2018 - 06:49

    No… had the most horrible day at work yesterday.

  • shortgum on 14/09/2018 - 08:41
    +1

    Are we allow to ask doctor for suicide prescription in aus? canada is allowed right. rip

  • neil on 14/09/2018 - 11:12
    +2

    Thanks for all the great comments and stories everyone. While talking to someone in-person is best, please don't hesitate to send myself or others who have offered a PM. Always happy to have a chat.

  • PAOK11 on 14/09/2018 - 11:26
    +1

    I wish someone would ask me if i'm ok. My gf cheated on and i'm hurting a lot

    • mezje on 14/09/2018 - 14:37
      +1

      Are you OK? Do you want to talk about it?

      • PAOK11 on 14/09/2018 - 14:39
        +1

        Thanks :( not right now too fresh. My birtgday is on Tuesday not going to be a good one :-(

        • mezje on 14/09/2018 - 14:46
          +3

          Rough but I'm sure you can find a way to enjoy it without your girlfriend. Being deceived when you thought you had trust is a horrible feeling, surround yourself with others that you have known for a long time and do something you enjoy.

        • PAOK11 on 16/09/2018 - 10:55

          @mezje: Thanks for you kind words at this difficult time

        • mezje on 17/09/2018 - 08:21

          @PAOK11:

          PM me if you ever want to talk about things and I will do my best to reply.

  • thrillerAU on 15/09/2018 - 09:33

    This may sound strange, but playing Pokemon Go and Jurassic Park Alive and playing it properly (without cheating) where I need to walk and explore helped me when I was in a huge rutt.

    Lunch breaks at work became more interesting, weekends became more interesting because I would go to New places in search of new Pokemon/dinosaurs and incidentally when I got hungry/thirsty - simply being in an unfamiliar environment was exciting.

    Hope this helps someone.

    • Clear on 15/09/2018 - 22:49

      +1 for PokeGo especially if you get involved with all groups that still play and team up for legendary battles. It's a great way to make new friends :)

  • Marcsie on 15/09/2018 - 13:21

    I’m OK, thanks :)

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